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[quinnr]

Just did my first facepalm EVER in this game...
Was making a death trap to flood my place if ever need be...which would be never, so I was mining it from above and missed...and it flooded my fortress...:facepalm:

I had the floodgate set up (my first floodgate ever!) and everything...IT EVEN HAD A LEVER! Fail.

[XSI]

I just had a facepalm moment

Right under my magma cistern there was a single tile of gold ore, which I want.

Well, no problem, I'll just selectively cave in the place around it so that my magma forges keep going, and the extra magma can be drained into the ocean. And look, here's a tile I can drop in the path of the magma, so it will all go the right way.

I then start channelling to get the tile attached to just a support with a lever.

I then look down to check on the gold, turns out, I channelled the gold I wanted to get the tile free, and there's now 2 levels of 7/7 magma on top of the gold ore.

*Facepalm*
(Now in ASCII form, spoilered)

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

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[KenboCalrissian]

Ugh, new facepalm...

I've been building a castle in my spare time with a way-too-easy fortress.  One of my main reasons for it is to exercise organizational skills, since my first fortress suffered from major placement problems.  I've been planning everything out as carefully as I can... three years into the project, and I reach a pretty big flaw; my planned dining hall is on the opposite side of the castle from the food stockpile.

I guess it could be worse... At least I didn't set my jewelers next to the food so I'd only get gemmed barrels (I have enough of those as it is...)

[Time Kitten]

Actually, I set my food stockpiles far from my dining room... at a far end of my fortress, protected by a finished meal stockpile so my dwarves don't munch up all the cookable veggies and meats.  then take a small stockpile from that into my dining room.  Saves me some food management headaches.

[bluea]

In a ten year old fort, I finally decided to start schmoozing the elves to see if I could get anything neat. A goblin ambush promptly appeared on top of the Elves and wiped out a caravan. But they had been happy enough that I didn't get attacked by the elves.

Part of the schmoozing was a plan to never, ever, have any loose wood for the entire spring season. Piles of Legendary Wood Burners mean this isn't all that tough.

Another aspect was always paying way, way more than necessary for the trade goods. Say 50k per caravan over and above the measly value of the elven goods.

Throw in a flat-out-bribe of 50k in goods. That's 100k per year.

So that first year after Bad Things happened to the elves, I received 100% wood. It cost me something like 300 ducks. And 100kducks in overpayment.

The very next year I received something like 7 wagons of rope reed cloth. With about three spools of rope reed thread.

So... from bad to worse. Hrrm. Redouble my efforts!

Time passes. Insert piles of money going to freaking pointy ear types here.

Cloth...Cloth...Cloth....Cloth...

Jeeze, they were really angry about losing their flipping caravan.

Cloth... Cloth....

"Hey, did you know that they consider cloth better than exotic animals in cages?"

[Ziusudra]

After seeing goblins just waltzing on in I realized I had just built cages, not cage traps. "Ugh, they don't even look the same. OK, I can fix this."

Needs mechanisms

"Oh carp!"

[Viroath]

-"Hey you mean by pressing 'z' I can actually choose what kind of cabinet goes in the noble's room?"

Wait...  You mean I don't have to forbid all masterpiece furniture of a type before building it for the masses, only to unforbid them and forbid everything else from the stocks menu then place the damned cabinet in the noble's room?

<Facepalm>

[kurokikaze]

-"Hey you mean by pressing 'z' I can actually choose what kind of cabinet goes in the noble's room?"

Wait...  You mean I don't have to forbid all masterpiece furniture of a type before building it for the masses, only to unforbid them and forbid everything else from the stocks menu then place the damned cabinet in the noble's room?

<Facepalm>

Wait, wha... facepalms too

[CobaltKobold]

Wait...  You mean I don't have to forbid all masterpiece furniture of a type before building it for the masses,

Well, that isn't entirely a bad idea- means you can avoid going through the long list if you're building in a hurry.

[KenboCalrissian]

In a ten year old fort, I finally decided to start schmoozing the elves to see if I could get anything neat. A goblin ambush promptly appeared on top of the Elves and wiped out a caravan. But they had been happy enough that I didn't get attacked by the elves.

Part of the schmoozing was a plan to never, ever, have any loose wood for the entire spring season. Piles of Legendary Wood Burners mean this isn't all that tough.

Another aspect was always paying way, way more than necessary for the trade goods. Say 50k per caravan over and above the measly value of the elven goods.

Throw in a flat-out-bribe of 50k in goods. That's 100k per year.

So that first year after Bad Things happened to the elves, I received 100% wood. It cost me something like 300 ducks. And 100kducks in overpayment.

The very next year I received something like 7 wagons of rope reed cloth. With about three spools of rope reed thread.

So... from bad to worse. Hrrm. Redouble my efforts!

Time passes. Insert piles of money going to freaking pointy ear types here.

Cloth...Cloth...Cloth....Cloth...

Jeeze, they were really angry about losing their flipping caravan.

Cloth... Cloth....

"Hey, did you know that they consider cloth better than exotic animals in cages?"

You know what's funny?  I started seizing the Elven caravans because all they were sending was cloth.  I had never seized before, so I was expecting a siege after the first time... when they came back with even more cloth, I seized again... the third time, they came chock full of stuff I actually wanted!  Not a speck of cloth to be found, but they had wood, exotic animals, wooden weapons (for sparring), booze, seeds, fruit... they even came loaded with wooden crafts.

I treated them VERY well that year, and the next was the same good stuff, then the next it was all cloth again... which I promptly seized.  Looks like with the elves, you need to do your trading with a clenched fist.

[Neoptolemus]

Biggest facepalm moment I've had is creating an underground sculpture garden with a water feature (tastefully arranged pools of water with seating next to them). The water level in the pools is only around 3 or 4 so things tend to fall in and disappear forever.

So far my dwarves have managed to lose an artifact bucket, various items of clothing and two babies down there, while two dwarves have also thrown themselves down there after going mad or depressed. The miasma that now wafts up from there is sure to upset the dozen or so dwarves I have partying in there, not to mention the unhappy thoughts from being unable to bury their mates.

Actually, I've noticed a third baby just crawling around the fortress, hungry and thirsty but no dwarf seems willing to claim it. Is this a bug or is there some serious post-natal depression hitting my fortress?

[SimRobert2001]

it means that its mother id dead.

as for mine, i built an outside drowning chamber for orcs, and when thy came, i filled it, expecting they would drown. instead, they just sat there, so i sent archers out to destroy them, completly unaware that the orcs could now climb out of the water, and slaughter my dwarves.  I built them inside from that point on.

[SquirrelWizard]

the crawling baby means that either the mother is dead, or unable to pick the child up (in jail, unconsious due to injuries)

[Yncke]

This happened fairly early during the life of my first fortress. I lost one miner to freestyle channel digging. After a while, I noticed two other miners not being very happy due to being hungry and thirsty. I didn't understand the stair system yet, and those two miners had somehow dug down a hole, with no way of getting up again. Whatever I designated, I couldn't get them to dig themselves out of it again. One starved to death, the other dehydrated.
After that, nobody did any mining anymore. Even if I made all my dwarves miners, and gave them no other jobs, they just loitered around instead of doing some honest digging.

I figured they were scared to mine because of the three miners dying in a short time span.

After two years, I was running out of rooms to fill and getting really annoyed with all those cowards. Then I realised that my fort's only three pickaxes were at the bottom of the canal or in an unreachable pit...

[TheCatfish]

My most recent fort has two.

My first was embarking on the shores of an ocean, thinking "Hmm, well it's not splashing or anything everything is fine." then after exploring the place and setting up places to mine, that I then unpaused it and saw my dwarfs washed away in rage-filled spashes.

My second was when I discovered an underground magma pipe right below part of my aquifer. I figured, "Hey I could dig a channel to right above and just drip it on the pipe to end up with obsidian" after completing the channel I then recieved hundreds of "A section of the cave has collapsed" messages. Cue savescum (Which I really didn't want to do as It had been at least a year since I'd last saved)