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[~Neri]

Granted, the horrors living in your mind are isolated from your true self and no longer hold sway over your mind, you are surrounded by loving family and friends.

I wish for an outdated and broken videogame console.

[WillowLuman]

Granted, the sensory deprivation puts you in a meditative state and in your extensive, undisturbed pondering you Figure It All Out.
Granted, it's an old CDI whose casing has been cut and twisted into a tasteful and valuable sculpture.

I wish this thread would take corruptions from the other one and uncorrupt them.

[~Neri]

Granted.

I wish for foxes.

[WillowLuman]

Granted, after years of hard work for the proper licenses and training you open a clinic for rehabilitating injured foxes and releasing them into the wild.

I wish for salsa.

[Lyeos]

Granted, you get a years supply of literally the best salsa you'll ever taste, and all future jars will only cost you one dollar, no matter what size.

I wish for death by burning.

[WillowLuman]

Granted, your self-immolation protest brings about massive societal reforms.

I wish for WWIII and IV

[Lyeos]

Granted, but both are fought with water guns and waterballoons filled with paint so as to not pointlessly waste human lives. By the time they're over, each side has forgotten their original goal because the wars were surprisingly fun!

I wish for lots of pain.

[NAV]

Granted. You are a masochist.

I wish the source code for Dwarf Fortress was deleted.

[~Neri]

Granted, the One Toad kept a backup.

I wish to be a pet.

[Roc CURIOUSBEAST_EATER]

Granted,
you get looked after extremely well.

I wish that toady locked the whole forum.

[WillowLuman]

Granted, it is for critical maintenance and upgrades.

I wish for Blue Sky studios to acquire the rights to every other animated IP

[smurfingtonthethird]

Granted, a newer forum with better features is opened.

Granted, they actually do a great job.

I wish that every living thing was actually a goat.

[IamanElfCollaborator]

Granted. Everyrthing now lives idyllic lives in pastures, being all goat-like and adorable.

I wish to be turned to stone.

[Lyeos]

Granted!

it is for critical maintenance and upgrades.

I wish my arms would explode.

Granted. You can no longer post on these forums, unless you want to type with your nose, and experience tells me that greatly reduces posting speed.

In what world is this uncorrupting that wish? At the very best, all you're doing is granting it as stated. 

[Harbingerjm]

Granted. You can no longer post on these forums, unless you want to type with your nose, and experience tells me that greatly reduces posting speed.

I wish QB would make a contract with Kevak.