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[WillowLuman]

Granted, while the lemonade would have been delicious, your life is spared.

I wish for a railroad spike through the cranium.

[~Neri]

Granted you are now a Steel Inquisitor.

I wish for lasers.

[BadLemonsXI]

Granted. It is I who does the stabbing lasers but as I have no hand and is a lemon what we get is a talking lemon trying to pick up a railroad spike lasers with there mouth (imma draw this later)

I wish for an un-dead wishing fish that wishes, wishes of evil wishes.

(andddd I gots ninja'd YAY)

[Arcvasti]

You get an immortal parrot that wishes whatever you tell it too.

I wish to be consumed with hellfire.

[flabort]

Definitely granted. Your mortal husk is consumed, and I wisk your soul away to join me in my private plane of paradise where demigoddesses attend to your every desire.

I wish to experience death for a second time.

[Lyeos]

Granted, but as you have yet to die, your second death is not only a long time coming, it means you got a second chance at life.

I wish for horrible, mind-breaking pain to reduce me to a quivering wretch.

[Scotsmen]

Granted. You are now a quivering wretch. Who constantly retches. While quivering. Quivering so hard that the vomit flies everywhere.

I wish for wishes.

[WillowLuman]

Granted, they are wishes for your wellbeing.

I wish for food poisoning.

[Tawa]

Granted. That which poisons you is only the most exquisite puffer fish, expertly cooked by a world-renowned French chef. This has also been given to you for free. You are revived by doctors after approximately seven minutes.

I wish that I would be bludgeoned to death with a platinum maul with gold and silver spikes on it.

[Scotsmen]

Granted.

I wish for grants.

[Lyeos]

Granted? They do exactly what they're supposed to. ((Methinks you needs to take a look at the OP))

I wish for all of my bones to be crushed into a fine powder before having my eyes gouged out, then be burned alive - all this without ever passing out or losing the ability to feel pain.

[WillowLuman]

Granted, your sacrifice keeps the world alive for another eon and your dust becomes a highly sought after consumable item.

I wish to be bisected vertically

[Roc CURIOUSBEAST_EATER]

(removed)

[Scotsmen]

Granted, your sacrifice keeps the world alive for another eon and your dust becomes a highly sought after consumable item.

I wish for death in my general direction.

[4maskwolf]

Granted, you are then reborn in a new body.

I wish I would die, right now, permanantly, and that my soul was whisked off to hell to be sinjected to eternal torment.