Then it doesn't really seem like it would be the same game.
I think that the best solution is to get V back.
The problem here is that Vaiolis isn't online. I'd recommend that someone(s) get a hold of him so that we can have a chat. However, we have to find him first. I know that in my case, one can google my proper (and surprisingly ironic for a DFer) name and get my address pretty easily.
So, we have to find Vaiolis's real name. I'm guessing that Vaiolis is an above-ground Bay12er, so he must have donated to Toady at some point in time. I have a suspicion that Bay 12 keeps some sort of donator records; he has to keep track of the ASCII art. If we're lucky, Vaiolis will have put in his hypothetical donations by a mailed in money order (like I do); in this case, his address might be on record.
All we have to do is, get to Toady's records (good thing that we can find his address by several means), then find Vaiolis. If we're unlucky, then we may have to deal with some sort of trap system at this point, but I'm sure that we (meaning you guys) can manage. If we're really unlucky, Vaiolis might have paid with paypal. In this case, we'll have to get the paypal info, then assault the paypal servers thingee (I'd assume that it exists somewhere). If might also become needed to get into the records of his credit card company.
I'd say that two squads with heavy weapons would probably be enough. We'll also need transportation to and from the target. I'd offer my Grand Am, but this would necessitate me cleaning my rucksack out from the back.