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Author Topic: Greatbridge of Oceans (community fort, why not)  (Read 46133 times)

Vieto

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Re: Greatbridge of Oceans (community fort, why not)
« Reply #75 on: April 06, 2009, 02:37:36 pm »

get me my tower! Lock the door, keep a few soldiers at the door, I can take the orcs!
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LegoLord

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Re: Greatbridge of Oceans (community fort, why not)
« Reply #76 on: April 06, 2009, 03:02:33 pm »

I think it's funny that the only one of the original 7 that worships a god related in any way to war is a total jerk.

Of course, this whole story is funny.
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"Oh look there is a dragon my clothes might burn let me take them off and only wear steel plate."
And this is how tinned food was invented.
Alternately: The Brick Testament. It's a really fun look at what the bible would look like if interpreted literally. With Legos.
Just so I remember

Eagle

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Re: Greatbridge of Oceans (community fort, why not)
« Reply #77 on: April 06, 2009, 03:33:16 pm »

Oh shit. We're screwed.  ;D

Lol, i like waves and eating cats. Fun.

Heron TSG

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Re: Greatbridge of Oceans (community fort, why not)
« Reply #78 on: April 06, 2009, 08:32:23 pm »

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Est Sularus Oth Mithas
The Artist Formerly Known as Barbarossa TSG

Vieto

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Re: Greatbridge of Oceans (community fort, why not)
« Reply #79 on: April 06, 2009, 08:48:10 pm »

Vieto Dives for the crossbow, and does a matrix cartwheel while loading and firing the crossbow, killing 5 orcs.
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varnish

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Re: Greatbridge of Oceans (community fort, why not)
« Reply #80 on: April 06, 2009, 09:30:15 pm »

The First Siege of Greatbridge: Run Like Hell

In retrospect, running up onto the hill was probably a bad idea, Solon thought. The orcs were there, all right, but apparently “coming up the coast” was Cazador's way of saying “Get the hell inside because they're right here!” Right here, and looking right at her. At this point, she probably screamed something like “pull the god damned lever get the drawbridge up you worthless sons of oh god wait wait for me to get back in first!”

They got the first part right.

Meanwhile:
This was it, Cazador thought. This was his chance. His chance to save the day, break the siege, and rescue their leader. He'd be a hero when this was over. He raised his crossbow, took careful aim at one of the lead wrestlers, and let fly. A miss! No matter, he had plenty more where that came from.

Er...

He rummaged frantically in his quiver. Nothing. Nothing but a roast plump helmet sandwich. “Ah, that's right. I packed my lunch in there today,” he muttered, as he watched the orcs chase Solon and some random fisherwarf over the hill. “Well, this is a bit embarrasing."

From the Journals of Solon Wardbridges, a bit later.

Ultimately, it was the brave fisherwarf's actions that saved me. (Though said fisherwarf may not have seen it that way.)



The majority of the orcs either chased after her, or felt that their time was best spent on dog killing. Still, it would have gone very hard for me had Inaluct not dug that escape tunnel. She also dug a channel into the dirt as I ran frantically to safety, effectively blocking that entrance for now. I'm putting her name up for a commendation.

All that's left now is to deal with the orcs outside the gate, and poor Cazador trapped in his tower. Easy stuff, right?



Gods.
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Katsuun

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Re: Greatbridge of Oceans (community fort, why not)
« Reply #81 on: April 06, 2009, 09:33:52 pm »

Cazadors tower shall be the death of him. Quickly, you must link it to the fortress proper!
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Quote
how would a Fortress based curse work?

Quote
Rocks fall, everyone dies.

Sans context.

varnish

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Re: Greatbridge of Oceans (community fort, why not)
« Reply #82 on: April 06, 2009, 09:40:15 pm »

The First Siege of Greatbridge, or: Cazador dies like a dwarf. Stupidly.

Cazador was infuriated, both with the orcs and with himself. If only he had remembered extra bolts, he could have been sitting happily on a pile of orc corpses, drinking in the adulation of his fellow dwarfs. Now, instead he was trapped in his own tower, forced to listen as the orcs tore apart the last of the fortresses pet dogs outside.

That's it. There was nothing left to do. If he waited much longer they'd surely come to get him. He could just see the artifact crossbow Bustedlung and a small stack of bolts outside. Time for heroism.



Busting out of the door, he was almost immediately struck in the chest by several orc arrows. Fortunately, the good solid leather armor his father had left him so long ago held strong.

It's just a pity he wasn't wearing any of said armor on his eyes, throat, legs, or arms.

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varnish

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Re: Greatbridge of Oceans (community fort, why not)
« Reply #83 on: April 06, 2009, 09:40:52 pm »

Cazadors tower shall be the death of him. Quickly, you must link it to the fortress proper!

Prophetic words, these.
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Heron TSG

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Re: Greatbridge of Oceans (community fort, why not)
« Reply #84 on: April 06, 2009, 09:43:45 pm »

arr, ye better save me artifact from dem orcses!

 :o
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Est Sularus Oth Mithas
The Artist Formerly Known as Barbarossa TSG

Vieto

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Re: Greatbridge of Oceans (community fort, why not)
« Reply #85 on: April 06, 2009, 11:31:09 pm »

 ;D

At least I won't die of starvation, or a slow, painful death.
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Red Fortune

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Re: Greatbridge of Oceans (community fort, why not)
« Reply #86 on: April 07, 2009, 05:45:17 am »

The dogs, oh no the dogs! Yeah you're doing RF right, and I think her role may be more apparent in later years. That is, if you survive. Poor Craz, he didn't even have a crossbow.
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"These humans only worship one god. Can you believe it?"
"Man, if I had to decide between the god of magma and the god of rubies, I just don't think I could handle it."

ChazzyBurger

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Re: Greatbridge of Oceans (community fort, why not)
« Reply #87 on: April 07, 2009, 06:09:17 am »

This is why the Orc Mod must be called the greatest mod of all time :D

This is a very good story, especially the part about the armour, lol
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Perpeptual Motion Machines

Dwarf Fortress' way of saying "Up Yours!" to physics

Katsuun

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Re: Greatbridge of Oceans (community fort, why not)
« Reply #88 on: April 07, 2009, 07:17:54 am »

Cazadors tower shall be the death of him. Quickly, you must link it to the fortress proper!

Prophetic words, these.

I am indeed a prophet. I now create the prophecy that when my character is born in this game, it shall die a horrible obsidian related death!

But seriously, its sad what happened to Cazador. But that's what happens when he attempts to live in a random tower.
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Quote
how would a Fortress based curse work?

Quote
Rocks fall, everyone dies.

Sans context.

Remalle

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Re: Greatbridge of Oceans (community fort, why not)
« Reply #89 on: April 07, 2009, 11:35:27 am »

Could we have a list of named survivors and deaths after sieges, if it's not too much trouble?  Thanks :)
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