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[Sean Mirrsen]

He does. A smooth, round mace is completely pointless, because it's round and smooth.

Alaskan Pollock:

A 120mm howitzer. With 120mm AP sabot rounds.

Next: Acoustic resonance.

[Strife26]

((But it could still be really heavy. Try taking a marble (smooth and round), then smack someone with it. It still hurts.))

[Sean Mirrsen]

((But it's still pointless. It has no points, see? C'mon, it ain't that hard. )

[Katsuun]

(Laughing manicely) Never thought about that!

Anyways:

Bassaphone:

This stupidly named device serves to release bass with such a low ferquency, and set to echo just correctly, so that it attracts animals of all kinds to it and allow the user to attack with them on command.

Next:DnD themed.

[Sean Mirrsen]

Spoooooky Cease&Desist.

12th level Spoooooky Wizard spell.
Casting time: 1 round.
Area of effect: infinite.
Deals an effectively infinite amount of damage to all copyrighted monsters when used in an unofficial DnD spinoff setting, and explosively disintegrates their corpses.
Limitations: can only be cast by the spooky wizard that lives by the coast.

Next: Literature

[Shoruke]

Anthem.

Reading it makes you want to hurt yourself, because it's such a terrible book. Goddammit Ayn Rand.

Next: Awesome yet unusable weapon

[The Willow Wisp]

Define unusable. Do you mean you cannot use it or you can use it but using it would kill you, thus it is deamed unusable?

[Dwarf]

Humongeous fucking gigantic ^{graham's number}graham's number yottaton TNT equivalent tachyon radiaton bomb.

When exploding, it releases <too much zeroes to display> yottawatts of energy in form of tachyon rays. These are so energetic that it rips the whole space time continuum apart - the whole world didn't even exist.

Next: Uselessly weak.

[Katsuun]

Gun-Shooting Gun:

A gun that shoots more guns. Horrible load time, does little actual damage. Cant support bullets, so you cant even use it for that. Stanard ammo cant hold bullets either. And their rubber. Yeah...

Next:A weapon so epic, it nullifies its epicness with its own epicness.

[Psyco Jelly]

Chain-cannon.

A cannon that shoots a catapult that shoots a ballista that shoots a crossbow that shoots a gun that shoots an arrow that shoots a bullet.

That bullet is moving too damn fast.

How does it's epicness nullify itself? Imagine the kickback.

[Sean Mirrsen]

Someone forgot the "next", so on the topic of Epic Epic Fail.

Enuf Dakka.

The entire universe transformed into a gun.
Absolutely powerful, except then it has nothing to shoot at except itself.

Next: Sliced bread

[RAM]

Sliced bread, dumped out the exhaust pipe of a space-ship, accelerated in the wake of a comet, catapulted around a star(now toast), propelled to relativistic speeds by a mythically unlikely convergence of electrons, compressed into hyper-dense material near the centre of a black hole, strikes earth, and begins compressing all surrounding matter into itself...

Next: Sliced bread

[Zako]

That, ladies and gentlemen, is what I call totally owned. In every aspect.

Modified toaster.

Fires minute coils of red hot wire after charging, which propel in many directions and slice living matter apart.

Warning: Do not insert dining implements into weapon.

Next: A broken weapon that still works.

[Akroma]

if you have a broken gun, do the following:

Step 1: tie the gun to a stick

Step 2: use the stick to bluedgeon your enemy to death with


next: uncomfortable yet strangely arousing

[Vlynndar]

Toaster.

Insert sliced bread.
Point at enemy.
Select crispyness.
Select crispyness of enemy.
Wait.
Win.

Warning: May cause tea parties.



Love seat.
Will make anyone feel UNCOMFORTABLY ENERGETIC.
Next: Remote control.