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Author Topic: Dwarf Hospital!  (Read 32718 times)

Kazindir

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Re: Dwarf Hospital!
« Reply #60 on: March 24, 2009, 09:24:39 am »
Quote from: Guy Montag on March 23, 2009, 09:01:11 pm
I'm just wondering if doctors will be getting moody and creating artifact splints and artifact pressure dressings or whatever the hell...

Urist McDoctor has been taken by a macabre mood.

...

... a dwarf bone splint. All craftdwarfship is of the highest quality. Adorned with hanging rings of dwarf leather, it menaces with spikes of soap.

:o
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scribbler

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Re: Dwarf Hospital!
« Reply #61 on: March 24, 2009, 11:15:53 am »
That's it.
Doctor McMuffin is taken by a fell mood.
Doctor McMuffin kills Ewan McRedshirt.
Doctor McMuffin fashions an exceptional bandage for McGuffin. On it are pictures of goblins and dwarves. The goblins are shooting the dwarves. This refers to the near death of McGuffin when a goblin shot him with a crossbow.
...
McGuffin is healed.
The exceptional bandage is removed, Doctor McMuffin flys into a fit of rage.
Doctor McMuffin kills McGuffin.
McGuffin is buried in a fell casket. On it are pictures of doctors and dwarves. The doctors are killing the dwarves.
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End the slaughter of dorf kittens!
No self respecting beard wants to wear his pet as clothing! Dorfs need population control for pets and bad thoughts from products made from the animals they choose to bond with.
---------
"There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats."
-Albert Schweitzer

Musluk

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Re: Dwarf Hospital!
« Reply #62 on: March 24, 2009, 11:19:01 am »
Quote from: Kazindir on March 24, 2009, 09:24:39 am
Urist McDoctor has been taken by a macabre mood.
...
... a dwarf bone splint. All craftdwarfship is of the highest quality. Adorned with hanging rings of dwarf leather, it menaces with spikes of soap.

:o

On the splint there is an image of Dwarf in Dwarf Chunks. The dwarf is in a fetal position.
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Fe3g12 - the fourth iron ore.
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Willfor

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Re: Dwarf Hospital!
« Reply #63 on: March 24, 2009, 11:42:30 am »
Dwarves could sign each other's casts in something like engraving. That would be interesting.
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In the wells of livestock vans with shells and garden sands /
Iron mixed with oxygen as per the laws of chemistry and chance /
A shape was roughly human, it was only roughly human /
Apparition eyes / Apparition eyes / Knock, apparition, knock / Eyes, apparition eyes /

scribbler

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Re: Dwarf Hospital!
« Reply #64 on: March 24, 2009, 03:09:39 pm »
WAIT!
If a cast is masterwork quality... Then the dwarves would never want to take it off! They'd wear their bandages forever rather than damage them by cutting them off.
On the upside, we no longer need a legendary dining room. They can admire their catheters.
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End the slaughter of dorf kittens!
No self respecting beard wants to wear his pet as clothing! Dorfs need population control for pets and bad thoughts from products made from the animals they choose to bond with.
---------
"There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats."
-Albert Schweitzer

LegoLord

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Re: Dwarf Hospital!
« Reply #65 on: March 24, 2009, 06:07:58 pm »
Quote from: Kazindir on March 24, 2009, 09:20:01 am
Quote from: Aqizzar on March 21, 2009, 07:45:19 am
I love how in the dry run, the doctor inspected himself instead of the patient.  "Well, I don't know about you, but I feel great!  Buck up me'boy, it's too nice a day to sulk about."

But yes, this is totally awesome.  With all this new room/item/worker/skills interaction going on, healthcare will be the new cornerstone industry of dwarf fortresses for a while.  Can't wait to see it all extended out to other jobs, but for now, DF is going to look a lot like Theme Hospital.

Oh god, if dwarves start getting nauseous....mexican waves of vomit spiralling around the underhalls. :o
Oh, come on now.  Dwarves won't look so disgusting people will vomit at the sight of them.

Oh.  I think you mean "nauseated."  :)
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Quote from: Vlynndar on April 02, 2009, 03:36:26 pm
"Oh look there is a dragon my clothes might burn let me take them off and only wear steel plate."
And this is how tinned food was invented.
Quote from: Vester on October 10, 2009, 10:10:11 pm
Alternately: The Brick Testament. It's a really fun look at what the bible would look like if interpreted literally. With Legos.
Just so I remember

Boksi

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Re: Dwarf Hospital!
« Reply #66 on: March 24, 2009, 06:10:33 pm »
What about when I mod in an illness that causes uncontrollable projectile vomiting, is highly contagious and is transmitted through vomit?
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Quote from: PTTG?? on April 15, 2010, 07:32:32 pm
[BODY_DETAIL:NAIL:NAIL:NAIL]
[HAMMER:HAMMER:HAMMER]

[TSU_NOUN:nose]
[SUN_TSU_NOUN:art:war]

shadow_archmagi

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Re: Dwarf Hospital!
« Reply #67 on: March 24, 2009, 06:30:27 pm »
Quote from: Boksi on March 24, 2009, 06:10:33 pm
What about when I mod in an illness that causes uncontrollable projectile vomiting, is highly contagious and is transmitted through vomit?

Only if you use the Throwing rules for the vomit projectiles.
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Quote from: Il Palazzo on October 20, 2008, 05:21:18 am
invention is every dwarf's middle name
Quote from: EvilCheerio on October 20, 2008, 05:24:46 am
that means that somewhere out there theres a dwarf named Urist Invention Mcinvention.

woose1

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Re: Dwarf Hospital!
« Reply #68 on: March 24, 2009, 06:35:52 pm »
Quote from: shadow_archmagi on March 24, 2009, 06:30:27 pm
Quote from: Boksi on March 24, 2009, 06:10:33 pm
What about when I mod in an illness that causes uncontrollable projectile vomiting, is highly contagious and is transmitted through vomit?

Only if you use the Throwing rules for the vomit projectiles.
Oh god. Dwarven hell.
Wait.... dwarven hell would have cats in it.
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Guy Montag

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Re: Dwarf Hospital!
« Reply #69 on: March 25, 2009, 12:09:09 am »
Yeah, if a soldier had a Masterwork splint applied to their fracture, the doctor would tantum and destroy his hospital if it was ever removed.

Logan Gearfeilds, Champion removes OFeather Wood SplintO
Urist mcDoctor throws a tantrum!

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The Doctor

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Re: Dwarf Hospital!
« Reply #70 on: March 25, 2009, 02:35:05 pm »
I wonder, if a legendary doctor could make someone BETTER then healthy?
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PTTG??

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Re: Dwarf Hospital!
« Reply #71 on: March 25, 2009, 02:58:45 pm »
Quote from: DoctorZ on March 25, 2009, 02:35:05 pm
I wonder, if a legendary doctor could make someone BETTER then healthy?

You mean Dwarven Steroids?
I thought dwarves where already 'roided-up. Which would explain the omnipresent beards.
So a Legendary Doctor would apply Steroid2s.
This just might work!
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Kazindir

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Re: Dwarf Hospital!
« Reply #72 on: March 25, 2009, 03:02:40 pm »
Quote from: LegoLord on March 24, 2009, 06:07:58 pm
Quote from: Kazindir on March 24, 2009, 09:20:01 am
Oh god, if dwarves start getting nauseous....mexican waves of vomit spiralling around the underhalls. :o
Oh, come on now.  Dwarves won't look so disgusting people will vomit at the sight of them.

Oh.  I think you mean "nauseated."  :)

Nauseous  ;)
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Aldaris

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Re: Dwarf Hospital!
« Reply #73 on: March 25, 2009, 03:15:51 pm »
All the theme hospital references...
When will Toady implement the anti/vermin shotgun?
Or portable magma bombs...
Actually, the shotgun in a fortress...
Urist cancels job; interupted by =Floating Shotgun=!
Urist has gone berserk!
Urist mcIgor, doctor, has been struck down.

And speaking of doctors, when is somebody going to mod in Gallifreyans?

And then there´s the whole Frankensteining, maybe as an init setting?
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Quote from: Little on January 23, 2010, 11:38:18 pm
but Baron Aqizzar had the firm advantage, battering Cthulhu with his Mighty Chin.
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Omnidum

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Re: Dwarf Hospital!
« Reply #74 on: March 25, 2009, 04:33:52 pm »
I hope they recommend everything with "Ice, compression and elevation".
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Quote from: Akroma on March 27, 2009, 07:27:35 am
this topic is about guys punching themselves in the balls, and nothing else
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