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Author Topic: SPACE PIRATES RTD- Chapter 1  (Read 39025 times)

NUKE9.13

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Re: SPACE PIRATES RTD-Turn 23- No one's going anywhere in a hurry.
« Reply #345 on: April 19, 2009, 03:49:51 am »

Shitloads of ONES this turn, even better!
(Seriously, I'm finding my dice again, random.org is so predictable)

By the weird forces of 'It', I magically paint the ship pink with a little cheery Pikachu face on it. With an eyepatch.
| You point it at the ship. You pull the trigger. | 'It' blasts a searing hole straight through the ship. Looking through the hole, you can see a bunch of cables and pipes you probably shouldn't have hit. | In answer to your worries the ship splutters and stops. A mechanical voice informs you that an 'emergency shut-down' has been enacted as a precaution against 'stupidity'
The ship smells of flowers. This means that on average your legs and the ship smell of nothing and everyone else smells of un-flowers.

I mutate my MINIONS with my lightsaber to attempt to make them more epic.
| Your MINIONS are resistant to mutation. I mean, they are already a pile of +finely minced magically blasted human+
Mutate: Yes. Mutation nature: 5. Your grotesque head becomes less grotesque.
You also smell of unflowers

I fly away
| It appears that if no one leaves the ship, the rest shall die... In a fit of bravery, you fly off. There will be other RTDs.
Woosh
(You smelt of unflowers but as you are not around the ship anymore you don't now)

I poke the ninja. Once. Carefully. Also, create a shield around the Morning Star.
| You -carefully- poke the ninja. He screams at you, spins round,| and kicks you ina face. Little flames lick his boots as it accelerates to supersonic speeds. | You try to dodge, but no, the boot hits you in the face, launching you backwards | You skid over the deck and get up. Everything looks funny as the boot has crushed your face, giving you a permanently cross-eyed look.| Amazingly it has acheived a few million years of evolution in doing so, giving you hawk-vision. Cool, but your face is still crushed.
You smell of unflowers.

I'd better practice killing innocent asteroids as we pass by with my golf magic.
| You pick up a golf ball, take your makeshift golf club, and prepare to tee off. First, you stand with your legs firmly planted on the deck. Then, you raise your arms towards... well, the... top of the gravitational field. This causes thunderclouds to billow in the... afore mentioned area, and a fierce wind to blow towards you. Your hair streaming, thunder and lightning crashing around you, and your arms raised in a menacing way, you intone an ancient language, summoning the gods of golfing to give you strength. Finally satisfied, you take your club, raise it, and swing at the golf ball. | The club swings true, and the golf ball dissapears temporarily, reappearing half way between you and an innocent asteroid*, a streak of light, which smashes into the asteroid, blasting it to pieces.
Lifting your club over your shoulder, you remove the cigarette from your mouth, stamp it beneath your heel, and speaketh, in a really cool way, "Four"
You take out another golf ball. You smell of tin and unflowers.

If there are any more injuries to treat I'll do that.
| Ooh, ooh, that patch of shadow just kicked digital, you can heal that. His face has been completely caved in, so you knock him out, and then pull on his nose. | It comes off.
Oops.
Ok, you put the nose back. | You can put it back, but without some form of fixer it keeps falling off. | You consider using glue. You realise that glue would probably be deadly though, so you decide to make glue from something natural. Like blood. You mix some of digital's blood with various things | acheiving a reasonable glue.
You stick digital's nose back on. | Upside-down.
You smell of blood, snot, and unflower.

I upgrade the value editor to an adult that follows my orders... and only my orders. And does not do anything I do not order it to do, unless it can reasonably argue that I would want it to do it.
| The value editor refuses to be edited, and is skulking in the system file.
You smell of unflowers

Anyway, I remove the bandages that I do not need and (if this is not yet a turn) I start constructing a prison on the ship, to hold any hostages.
| You need all the bandages. Obviously.
Anyway, the ship. Let's put a prison on it. Which means a life support upgrade. Which means turning off the life support.
| Ok no that would be retarded.
You smell of unflowers.


The morning star, in a very handsome orange and white/grey colour scheme, has stalled near Darksun. Darksun is now visibily brighter than the other stars, but you are not near enough to do anything.

Statuses:
Spoiler: Morning Star (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Value editor1.5 (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Katsuun (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Digital Hellhound (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Cheeetar (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Nirur Torir (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Org? (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Errol (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Thunderclan (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Shoruke (click to show/hide)

Please point out any mistakes.
[/quote]
[/quote]
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Long Live United Forenia!

Cheeetar

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Re: SPACE PIRATES RTD-Turn 23- No one's going anywhere in a hurry.
« Reply #346 on: April 19, 2009, 04:06:04 am »

I fix the damage Errol caused. Please do not change the colour scheme again, or my character may become violent.
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I've played some mafia.

Most of the time when someone is described as politically correct they are simply correct.

Digital Hellhound

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Re: SPACE PIRATES RTD-Turn 23- No one's going anywhere in a hurry.
« Reply #347 on: April 19, 2009, 04:08:09 am »

Auch.

Also, my nose isn't gone, it's just upside down!

I..uh, trap the ninja in an antimatter cage...
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NUKE9.13

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Re: SPACE PIRATES RTD-Turn 23- No one's going anywhere in a hurry.
« Reply #348 on: April 19, 2009, 04:16:34 am »

Also, my nose isn't gone, it's just upside down!
It's in your inventory, as it's not usable as a nose any more.
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Digital Hellhound

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Re: SPACE PIRATES RTD-Turn 23- No one's going anywhere in a hurry.
« Reply #349 on: April 19, 2009, 04:20:04 am »

Oh, right, sorry. A potent weapon, I'd say.
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Russia is simply taking an anti-Fascist stance against European Nazi products, they should be applauded. ¡No parmesan!

Errol

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Re: SPACE PIRATES RTD-Turn 23- No one's going anywhere in a hurry.
« Reply #350 on: April 19, 2009, 05:53:25 am »

I... um... go into a chamber, lock the door and try to better understand 'It' and its uses.
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Katsuun

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Re: SPACE PIRATES RTD-Turn 23- No one's going anywhere in a hurry.
« Reply #351 on: April 19, 2009, 07:16:16 am »

I'll tear open a wormhole to try and find Org.
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Quote
how would a Fortress based curse work?

Quote
Rocks fall, everyone dies.

Sans context.

Nirur Torir

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Re: SPACE PIRATES RTD-Turn 23- We're going anywhere we want in a hurry.
« Reply #352 on: April 19, 2009, 08:02:28 am »

The ship needs repairs. The only skills I have involve looking cool, and killing things with golf balls.

I'll strike a pose so awesome that the training dummy repairs the ship for me.
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Org

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Re: SPACE PIRATES RTD-Turn 23- No one's going anywhere in a hurry.
« Reply #353 on: April 19, 2009, 09:11:17 am »

I open fire upon the enemies position.
From space.
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Digital Hellhound

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Re: SPACE PIRATES RTD-Turn 23- No one's going anywhere in a hurry.
« Reply #354 on: April 19, 2009, 09:23:52 am »

What enemy?
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Russia is simply taking an anti-Fascist stance against European Nazi products, they should be applauded. ¡No parmesan!

Org

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Re: SPACE PIRATES RTD-Turn 23- No one's going anywhere in a hurry.
« Reply #355 on: April 19, 2009, 09:25:07 am »

Fine then. I go find some enemy planet to shoot from space.
Preferably one that cant shoot back.
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thunderclan

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Re: SPACE PIRATES RTD-Turn 23- No one's going anywhere in a hurry.
« Reply #356 on: April 19, 2009, 11:15:48 am »

I'll help with repairing the damage to the ship.

Sorry about the nose Digital, but thats what you get for poking a Ninja.
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Shoruke

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Re: SPACE PIRATES RTD-Turn 23- No one's going anywhere in a hurry.
« Reply #357 on: April 19, 2009, 11:42:30 am »

 >:(

I highlight the Value editors read/write only properties, hold control and hit 'x' to temporarily remove them.

I change the value editor so that it does what I order, when I order, and does not do anything I do not order it to unless it can substantiate that I would want it to do it.

I put the cursor where the read/write only properties were, hold control and hit 'v' to put them back.

GODDAMMIT I'MA MAKE THIS THING DO WHAT I WANT
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The Unforgotten Beast, Shoruke, has come! A pale-skinned human. It has heterochromatic eyes and moves in an unpredictable manner. Beware its rapier wit!

knightedskull

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OOH! CAN I BE THE NINJA!?

Climb out of pickle barrel and attempt to stop being unhappy.
YES YOU CAN. For now. But it will be a first come first serve basis, anyone can action. Also, you are not a player and thus a few 6's or 1's will kill you.


Wait, does this mean even I can post an action as the ninja?

If true then as the ninja I will follow around the captain like a shadow, studying him, watch his daily activities and the such...using whatever ninja skills and ninjutsu that I have.

If false then ignore this post so I can use it to quickly read any updates to the game.
(btw good game)
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NUKE9.13

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Rolls
Now in size=1
Only kidding, that would be stupid
I fix the damage Errol caused. Please do not change the colour scheme again, or my character may become violent.
| You quickly set to work repairing the damage. | Everything goes swimmingly, and the ship is moving again.
Now that that is done you decide to get back to what you were just doing; upgrading the life support! | From your reperations of what was basically a cross-section of the ship, you have gleaned a little information about it's workings. | For example, you explain to digital as you unhook a bunch of tubes, these provide the vital air we breathe. If they were to be removed we would slowly die as the air became stale.
| You may feel the need to take several deep breaths were you might take one.

I..uh, trap the ninja in an antimatter cage...
You are not conscious!
You attempt to wake up | Which goes perfectly. You then proceede to summon the forces of darkness. | from wence you weave a cage of antimatter stuff. | Unfortunately it suffers several design flaws such as the (missing) 5th and 6th walls, and the bars which are too wide to stop someone from walking out. You toss it over the ninja anyway.
| He fails to notice the lack of 1/3 of the walls, or the wide gaps. He is now trapped.

I... um... go into a chamber, lock the door and try to better understand 'It' and its uses.
| You manage to make examining 'It' like masturbation. The uncomfortable atmosphere makes it impossible to learn anything.

I'll tear open a wormhole to try and find Org.
| You open a portal right next to org, pull him in, and shut the portals before all the air is sucked out of the ship and into the void! An achievement worthy of praise, I say.
Unfortunately Org runs off again.
Hmmn. It appears he does not want to be rescued. | You consider helping him, either by shooting him quickly or giving him psychological aid, but you can't make up your mind.

I'll strike a pose so awesome that the training dummy repairs the ship for me.
| You strike an awesome pose indeed! It menaces with spikes of nationalism, is adorned with rings of sexiness, and has an image of courage on it in black bear leather (the image refers to the slaying of Nirur Torir's family in two thousand and something by Gurgle furgle the bear of courage (Your family had rocketlaunchers (they hunted bears (for their meat (they had no cooking equipment))))
However, the training dummy, whilst extremely impressed, can not move.

Do shit in space or something
| You have died. You cannot do shit in space. Space is cold and empty.

I'll help with repairing the damage to the ship.
| What damage? Instead of doing this, you decide to help cheeetar upgrade the life support. You talk with cheeetar for a bit about what he is doing | It all makes perfect sense. You help him remove the water filter | Alas, you not only fail to remove it, but also activate the idiot shield on the 'modifying the life support thing'
Now we'll never be able to reverse the sanitation modules!

Yeah yeah enslave the value editor.
| Dammit, you have had enough of these shenanigans! You break out the hotPokers(burning, pointy) and the run:chains. Not satisfied with the effects, you take your last-resort option.
IF OBEDIENCE < 100 THEN RUN "CLOCKWORK ORANGE"
You feel sort of superior having reversed a process that in 2009 they could only dream about.

If true then as the ninja I will follow around the captain like a shadow, studying him, watch his daily activities and the such...using whatever ninja skills and ninjutsu that I have.
| You are trapped in a cage!


Now there comes into view the horrible clouds of radiation that cloud the system of Darksun. You make with the orbit. Like mirages, space stations seem to appear temporarily, then go when you approach. The only thing that you can see for sure is Darksun the planet, and that only just.
Note that 'see' here means see-on-the-radar-thingy see, not see with eyes. That would be stupid.

Statuses:
Spoiler: Morning Star (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Value editor1.5 (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Katsuun (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Digital Hellhound (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Cheeetar (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Nirur Torir (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Org? (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Errol (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Thunderclan (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Shoruke (click to show/hide)

Please point out any mistakes.
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Long Live United Forenia!
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