This took long enough now that I no longer have holidays. But I'll get the turn up today, preferably now.
Yanlin (AI) - Learn about meme lore. (5+1=6)
In order to be more efficient at memetic mutations you decide to implement the entire world's meme knowledge into your brain. Despite the circumstances you fully manage to achieve your target, and now you possess Legendary knowledge of memetic mutations. Unfortunately, a lot of parts feature /b/, and you now need to perform a Sanity Check each turn. Have fun.
Org - Force out Kashyyk in the Kobold's body. (5)
Deciding that the presence of Kashyyk in your body is troublesome, you simply push him out. Ahh, that hangover got much better. Kashyyk's ghost chose to possess the nearest unclaimed humanoid, which happened to be the discarded Kobold. He still needs to grow used of the new body though.
Kashyyk - Go into castle with the intent of finding the summoning chamber. (2-1=1)
Because you can't control yourself in your sorry state you fell flat on your face. Org had a good laugh though.
Cheetar - Follow thunderclan in the hope of getting inside. (1)
You decide to follow thunderclan through the needlessly complicated keep. Sure enough, you lose his trace somewhere after the second turn, and take the wrong directions. After a lot of time you ended up in the subterrean dungeon.
Boksi - Translate a suitably short part of text. (1+1=2)
You don't know where to start. You turn page after page but can't make out anything. Then, you notice the dictionary standing on its shelf and curse yourself. (3) You try to get it but can't reach it. Just after turning it falls down, leaving it in a somewhat dusty state. You dust it off and take it.
thunderclan - Find an archery range or something in order to practise fire magic. (5-1=4)
You manage to find an archery range out of pure luck, and you think you can get out safely again. The archery targets are made of stone so you can target them safely with fire magic, and there is ammo lying all over the ground.
Nuke (AI) - Fill castle with monster cakes. (3+1=4)
You do so, filling the castle with Gooncakes, Gooncakes MKII, Ninjacakes and Goddamnedbatcakes. You feel you could have used more varieties but are too exhausted to do anything more. You feel better at Cake Magic.
wehtamjd92 - Craft dwarves from the earth they all come from and form your very own army! (6)
You make a crude dwarven statuette from mud and animate it with a spell. Then you get an idea and instruct the statuette to craft dwarves like itself. The statuette complies and makes a slightly better dwarvette. You get a feeling that you saw that before, but dismiss it. Every turn, the amount of dwarves will double.
While your golems build industriously, you set yourself on the task to build a clay dragon. It will be glorious! (2) You can't figure out how to solve that problem with the gravity though.
Statuses
Yanlin
Status: Standing upright. Unharmed.
Location: Dwarven village in Myrror.
Equipment: Typical dwarven clothing. A pig tail sock. A shiny sword.
Items: Shred of black cloth. Dwarven cheezburger, Fine Meme.
Skills: Comedian, Mechanic, Legendary Memetic Mutator, Cook.
Abilities: Agile. Commander of 30 well-equipped dwarves.
Effects: Has /b/ burned in his mind.
JP: 6
Kashyyk
Status: Prone, unharmed (except for his pride).
Location: Clearing.
Equipment: Naked, thanks to thunderclan.
Items: Bottle of Wow-wow sauce.
Skills: Sun Mage, Axedwarf, Animal Trainer, Dabbling Swordsdwarf, Alchemist.
Abilities:
Understands the concept of flying, Tough, Deep Trancer,
In a kobold's body.
Effects:
Hangover.
JP: 1
NUKE9.13
Status: Standing upright. Unharmed.
Location: Clearing.
Equipment: Typical dwarven clothing.
Items: CakeXBow materials.
Skills: Adept Cake Mage, Cook, Crossbowdwarf, Liar.
Abilities: Tough.
Effects:
Difficult to notice.
JP: 8
Cheetar
Status: Standing upright. Unharmed. Unusually small. Very pink skin.
No beard.
Location: Keep. Completely lost.
Equipment: Typical dwarven clothing.
Items:
Rapier,
Pointy Stick.
Skills: Speardwarf, Animal Tamer, Rapier User, Skilled Mason.
Abilities:
Big Eater, Strong,
Death Of A Thousand Cuts.
Effects: Stout.
JP: 2
Boksi
Status: Standing upright. Unharmed.
Location: In the tower, highest room.
Equipment: Typical dwarven clothing. Wizard hat.
Items: Dusty rune-to-dwarf dictionary.
Skills: Wrestler, Mason, Skilled Ki User.
Abilities:
Hadouken, Strong.
Effects: None.
JP: 2
thunderclan
Status: Standing upright. Unharmed.
Location: Clearing.
Equipment: Typical dwarven clothing.
Items: Two silver coins, twelve copper coins, toy hammer, dirt, -xIron short swordx-, disintegrating leather armor, large adamantine dagger, =<<=narrow giant cave spider silk loincloth=>>=, masterful narrow carp leather sandals.
Skills: Swordsdwarf+, Wrestler, Fire Mage, Searcher.
Abilities:
Fire resistance, Agile.
Effects:
Has seen it all. Memorized castle layout.
JP: 6
wehtamjd92
Status: Standing upright. Unharmed. 'Owns' 2^1 clay dwarf golems.
Location: Somewhere near the portal.
Equipment: Typical dwarven clothing, except for the thong.
Items: Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch, 50 gold coins.
Skills: Siege Operator, Siege Engineer, Weaponsmith, Furnace Operator, Golem-maker.
Abilities:
Iron-infused beard,
Moonwalker,
Strong, Tough.
Effects: None.
JP: 8
Org
Status: One hand has very long and sharp fingernails. Standing upright. Unharmed.
Equipment: Typical dwarven clothing.
Items:
Set of leather armor, Iron battle axe, two dozen pebbles.
Skills: Wrestler, Shield User, Mekboy, Thrower.
Abilities: Very Strong, Tough.
Effects: Can smell armor.
JP: 2
Background roll (2) Repeat goggles joke if necessary.
Random event roll (4) Nothing happens, it stays rather calm.
Dwarven caravan is scheduled to arrive in 2 turns. You'd better build a trade depot.
Tiny speck in the air, arriving in about 4 turns.
My eyes! Ze dwarves do nothing!
Monster compendium:
NagaFire ElementalKobold ThiefGooncakeGooncake MKIINinjacakeGoddamnedbatcakes.Spell Compendium:
HadoukenCakesphere
DisintegrateLightning Bolt
Author
Topic: RTD - with cheese - Dead (Read 28155 times)