To celebrate the fact I got a snazzy new avatar, I'll post the turn. Soon enough.
Yanlin
Attempted Action: I summon my great powers of awesomeness to smite all those who oppose me. (2)
A weak energy extends from your palms. Everyone in the room gets minor discomfort. Apparently there were too many targets.
Kashyyk
Attempted Action: I work out how to control the number of clones created, using mah trance skillz!
If possible I also wake up. (1)
You only succeed in somehow removing your ability to stop the uncontrollable reproduction. Penalty changed to -2. Also, no waking up for you.
Oh, and a small hint - as long as he trances, he has -2 to all dodge rolls, and -1 to damage rolls.
NUKE9.13
Attempted Action: I cast 'Grandma's Saltpetre Spongecake' against cheeetar and/or boksi.
(3+1=4)
You target Cheeetar and perform a casting of Grandma's Salpetre Spongecake above him, intending to have the horrible thing strike him. (1) Cheetar is not even noticing the quite heavy cake falling towards him! (1) Cheetar collapses to the ground, and it isn't a pretty view. He is now collapsed on the ground with some quite severe bone damage. -1 to all actions. And a -1 against fire damage, due to the saltpetre.
Cheetar
Attempted Action: Again, two strikes to Squeegy. (4-1=3)
Cheetar struggles free of the Spongecake. One foot remains buried. He mutters some insults under his breath.
Boksi
Hey Squeegy! HADOUKEN! (4)
You focus your ki and, to your astonishment, manage to produce an admittedly rather slow-moving fireball. Apparently Hadouken's aren't unheard of in this universe. (4+1=5) Squeegy dodges without problems.
thunderclan
Attempted Action: I'll slash someone with my flaming sword. (6)
Because you can't decide, you slash everyone in sight. This means: Boksi, Cheetar, Nuke and Squeegy will be attacked. (6) (2-1) (2) (2) While Boksi manages to dodge in style, the others aren't so lucky. (6) (5+1) (4) Cheetar parrys, Nuke simply stands there and lets his plating absorbs the blow, and Squeegy only receives some small burns. Disappointed, you throw a fireball at Nuke. (1) Nuke uses his usual tactic of letting his plating do the dirty work. (2+1) However, some plating melts. The fire resistance is reduced to merely statistical.
wehtamjd92
Attempted Action: I go through the door and explore whatever lies behind it. (3)
Deciding to forgo the usual trouble, you approach the door and open it. You enter. Suddenly, there's a flash of light, and you find yourself in a wide corridor of sorts. Weird floating machines with an energy shield and spotlights patrol the room. You see some.. weird rocks on the ceiling. Due to your gazing you completely forget to do anything exploratory.
Org
Attempted Action: I join squeegy in his attempts to do goodz. (4-2=2)
You stand up and lean against the wall, panting heavily. You try to heal yourself, but are simply too exhausted.
Squeegy
Attempted Action: I summon additional raeg by imagining that Cheeetar has donated $1 less than Toady needed to live and produce DF 1.0, then crush him! (1)
You suddenly, in all clearness, see that you're in the future and Toady already completed DF long ago, and it being a magnificient, exceptional game. You collapse from information overload.
Background Roll (4): The spongecake develops a life of his own! He appears to change into a roughly humanoid figure, or rather you see he already was. The figure is mostly green, with two long ropes protuding from his body and a weird flower on his head. He currently holds these in his arms. He stands up and calls: "Who dares to suddenly teleport Wire Sponge? I'll kill you dead!" You hear a faint "You're standing on my foot!" from Cheeetar.
StatusYanlin
Status: Standing upright. Light bleeding.
Location: Computer terminal room.
Equipment: Partly brown pants.
Items: Shred of black cloth, Throwing Fake Battle Cake in the face.
Skills:
Novice Awesome,
Dabbling Farter,
Dabbling Gravity Defier.
Abilities:
Can walk on every vertical surface,
slightly impervious to blunt weapons,
Dabbling Cheese Mage.
Effects: None.
JP: 2
Kashyyk
Status: Hovering 50cm above ground in a meditating fashion. Unharmed.
Location: Toilet room.
Equipment: Pants,
Steel hand-and-a-half sword.
Items: Nothing of note.
Skills:
Novice Searcher,
Novice Sun Mage,
Novice Awesome.
Abilities:
Understands the concept of flying,
Uncontrolled Cloning.
Effects:
Trancing.
JP: 0
NUKE9.13
Status: Standing upright. Unharmed.
Location: Computer terminal room.
Equipment: Pants.
Items: Nothing of note.
Skills:
Novice Cake Mage, Dabbling Fake Cake Summoner,
Dabbling Decorative Cake Icer.
Abilities:
Infused with the essence of cake,
menaces with spikes of icing, plated with plates of icing, layered with layers of jam.
Effects:
JP: 3Cheetar
Status: On the ground.
Wounded.
Location: Computer terminal room. Wire Sponge on the foot.
Equipment:
Naked,
cool rapier.
Items: Torn trousers, worn t-shirt.
Skills:
Novice Materialless Constructer, Dabbling Dimension Mage,
Novice Rapier User.
Abilities: Nothing of note.
Effects:
Black Hole Trauma.
JP: 0
Boksi
Status: Standing upright. Unharmed.
Location: Computer terminal room.
Equipment: Pants.
Items: Nothing of note.
Skills:
Novice Kicker, Dabbling Dodger, Dabbling Blocker,
Dabbling Ki Dissector.
Abilities:
Hadouken.
Effects: None.
JP: 2
thunderclan
Status: Standing upright. Unharmed.
Location: Computer terminal room.
Equipment: Pants,
Blood-smeared cleric's robe,
!!short sword!!,
spiked boots, Blood spatterings.
Items: Six bricks,
two flies,
a Cleric's corpse,
three torches (-2 to damage, fire roll),
Nunchaku, three throwing cakes,
an Halberd,
a spiked wrecking ball on a chain ,
a Staff of Cheese Summoning,
a Knife of Stabbity Fun,
a repeater crossbow.
Skills:
Dabbling Dodger, Dabbling Puncher,
Novice Fire Mage, Dabbling Searcher.
Abilities:
Fire resistance.
Effects:
Smells,
Has seen it all.
JP: 5
wehtamjd92
Status: Standing upright. Unharmed.
Location: Spotlight corridor.
Equipment:
Chainmail bikini.
Items: Pants.
Skills:
Novice Spearman,
Dabbling Macebeard User, Dabbling Puncher.
Abilities:
Mace-beard,
Drunk-Fu,
Moonwalker,
Style of the three-headed monkey.
Effects: None.
JP: 6
Org
Status: Leaning to the wall. Several cracked ribs.
Location: Computer terminal room.
Equipment:
Power Klaw, Underwear trousers.
Items: Nothing of note.
Skills:
Dabbling Puncher, Dabbling Dodger,
Novice Improvised Material Crafter, Dabbling Death Mage.
Abilities:
Very Strong.
Effects:
Exhausted.
JP: 2
Squeegy
Status: Standing upright. Unharmed. Misses some teeth.
Location: Computer terminal room. Near Boksi and Cheetar.
Equipment: Pants,
Iron war hammer,
stench flavored cheesecake warhammer, covered in (have no effects):
Sword-chucks, three spears,
an ice gun,
an harpoon ,
a Staff of Venom,
an Enchanted Throwing Stick.
Items:
Skills:
Proficient Decorative Cake Froster, Dabbling Searcher,
Proficient Cake MageAbilities:
Learner,
Covered in Weapons,
BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD.
Effects:
Made an artifact,
Dazed.
JP: 1
NPCs:
Wire Sponge
Status: Humanoid. Slightly taller than two metres. Green, has two vines in his hands. Vines are connected to body. Weird flower on head. Hostile.
Location: Computer terminal room.
Abilities and skills unknown.
ArtifactsDeliciouspain the Icing of Spikes, an Artifact Cake (Squeegy)
A cake which is adorned with hanging rings of frosting, menaces with spikes of icing and is encrusted with icing. There are two images on the cake. The first image is of a cake. It relates to Deliciouspain the Icing of Spikes, a dwarven wheat cake. The second image is of a dwarf and a cake. The dwarf is making a plaintive gesture. The cake is laughing. This image relates to the death of Urist Daggerheart at the hands of Deliciouspain the Icing of Spikes.
+2 to throwing damage, Irresiastable Smell (currently wrapped)