Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Katsuun]

Yes, I am somehow an epic character. 

[LegoLord]

5th Slate, Spring 109
   Gaius Boatcalm was the creator of Libash Tobat’s first artifact:  The Wayward Lancer, the turtle shell chain than partially composed the well.  He had lived in the fort nearly since it started, and had known many of the dwarves who fought and died over the years very well.  He was currently in the craftdwarf’s shop, carving a new creation.

   He had before him turtle shells and the skeletons of a skakdi and a goblin.  From the skakdi skeleton, he made a pair of gauntlets, grinning every time he chipped into the bone, cutting them into small plates and fastening them together with the sinews.  With the goblin skeleton, he constructed a pair of greaves.  Finally, with the turtle shells, he constructed a suit of plate mail - something never before attempted.

   He donned the armor, starting with the plate mail.  “The nobles and weavers will look up and shout ‘Save us!’” he pulled on the gauntlets.  “And I will look down,” he fastened the greaves.  “And I will cackle: ‘Ahahah!  Look at them idiots squirm!’” He then left to find Bubbles’ old copper mace and the pieces of armor he could not make himself.

* * * * *

12th Slate, Spring 109
   “Wroooaaaarrrgh!”  Erush the elite marksman shouted as he charged a child in the hallway leading to the arena.  He had been driven berserk by the recent killing of his friends and his injuries; he felt he needed to hurt things.  Fortunatley for the child, a member of the fortress guard was passing by and threw Erush into the wall of the hallway by his left arm and swiftly beat the crazed dwarf to death.  Now only one marksman remained, stricken by meloncholy at the news of Erush later that day.

[Mook]

Gaius is a dwarven Rorschach?  Awesome!

Now let's just hope he survives a few battles before meeting his doom.

[LegoLord]

Yeah, I saw that movie yesterday.  Different from the graphic novel, but just about as close as a movie of it could get.

One important distinction though:  Gaius laughs (and likes pain).

22nd Slate, Spring 109
   “OH ARMOK I’VE BEEN POPPED!!” Astesh the leatherworker shouted just outside his workshop, his voice resonating with itself.  Several dwarves looked at him, and he looked back through squinting eyes.  He then muttered: “Oh.  Hm.  Well, guess it’s time to get to work, then.  What am I . . .” he searched his pockets and found an I.D. tablet.  “Ah, a leatherworker.  Oh well.  Gotta do the best with what I’ve got.”

   He searched through several stockpiles and gathered at his workshop the following: two bolts of Giant Cave Spider chitin, a stack of alligator leather, two goblin skeletons, some clear plastics, a bolt of cave spider silk cloth, some pig iron, and some basalt blocks.  He then set to work.

   “With this squint, no one will know I’m possessed.  Er . . . possessing.  Whatever.”

[LegoLord]

6th Felsite, Spring 109
   “Argh!  That wasn’t what I meant to do!  I was trying to make a shield!” Astesh the leather worker cried.  He held the product of his toil in front of him, frowning.  “Oh well.  I guess it’s time for me to go.  Armok help these dwarves."

[thunderclan]

That is a great name for something made of Spider Chitin and Silk

[LegoLord]

Yeah, sometimes it seems like the RNG is almost sentient.

11th Felsite, Spring 109
   Katsuun stormed into the dining hall and bellowed, “EZUM!”

   “Oi!  Why’re ye bein’ so loud, eh?  I kin hear ye, ye know.  I’m right next ta ye.”

   Katsuun lowered his voice immediately, “Are you mad?!  Why haven’t you stopped Uvash from searching for Adamantine?!  I told you what that would bring!”

   “Ye said ye were tryin’ ta lure the Queen ‘ere, aye?  Well, there ye have it.  We find the blue metal, she comes here.”

   “But if you find it there will be nothing to stop her from ordering the miners to dig too deep!  Her greed and selfishness know no boundaries!”

   “Aye, I’ve heard this ‘afore.  Fra’ what I read ‘bout Adamantine, we’ll have two or three stories of minin’ ‘afore we hit any pits.”

   “But those are old stories!  You can’t seriously be risking the fate of the mortal world on something like that!”

   Ezum shrugged.  “Well ye don’ seem ta be gettin’ much done yer way.  So we’ll do things my way.  Screw yer Order.”

   “I cannot allow that.  If you don’t hold back, I will have to kill Uvash.”

   “Too late fer that.  He’s already found it.”  Ezum said with such finality that Katsuun’s jaw dropped, as did his hammer.

   “You can’t be serious . . . I’ve been staying up late nights to make sure he wouldn’t able to do that . . . he should be off-course . . .”

   “Ye fergot about the other miners.  I had ‘em start workin’ with ‘im.  Aye, don’ look at me like that.  I kin tell it was yer hammer that’d been beatin’ Uvash over the head.  Yer on thin obsidian, Katsuun.  Now get outta here, I’m tryin’ ta eat.” With that, Katsuun left, scowling.

   “You don’t know what you’ve just set in motion Ezum.  May the Demons send you to a special level of their Hell.”

[Heron TSG]

Aw, I was hoping for some epic platemail from bubbles. Either way, bubbles should possess the scariest animal we have. (one that would kick the most ass in combat)

[LegoLord]

Yeah, there are also some ways in which the RNG seems almost like pond scum.

10th Hematite, Summer 109
   The alarm bells sounded throughout the halls of Libash Tobat as the Human diplomat Iguk Calmaunt arrived at the entrance.  He was not the cause for the alarm.

   “Oh shit.”  He said, breaking into a run for the entrance.  The drawbridge rose as he made it into the depot chamber.  There were no merchants this season.

* * * * *

   Zasit Galleywindy The Moral Songs stood in the barracks for the first time in a few years.  He watched as the diplomat ran into the fort, a squad of skakdi swordsmen not far behind.  He chuckled.  Four of them were caught in traps and the rest decided to start fleeing.  Of course, he knew, there would be more, but there was at least one squad they need not worry over. 

   A squad of bowmen and spearmen arrived, and would soon be within firing range of the Ussal Crabs chained at the entrance.  Zasit signaled to the other warriors in the room to go inside the trade depot chamber.

   The drawbridge was lowered, and dwarf charged at skakdi.  Zasit quickly gained the lead, eager to fight once more.  He paused briefly before reaching his opponents. “Oh shit, not again.” he said as his eyes glazed over.  Then he said, “Damn, no mace with this guy.  Gotta pop these with my bare hands then.”  He then jumped into the swarm of spears, followed by the remaining champions of Libash Tobat.  Gaius stood watching from behind a statue in the depot chamber.

   A copper spear came at Zasit, who said, “Shit, where’s this guy’s shield?!”  The spear struck him in the upper body.  Two more spears struck him, one sticking in his left upper leg, another in his right hand.  Another blow struck in the chest.

   The glaze lifted from Zasit’s eyes.  “Just a little rusty . . .” he muttered before falling to the ground, eyes still open, not moving.  Sheena then swung her spear into the crowd, knocking all the skakdi to the ground.  The other wrestler started grabbing and throwing skakdi warriors at random.

   “Slay them all!  We shall not fall!”  Sheena shouted with malice.  She was vaguely aware of fortress guardsmen joining in.  Another bowmen squad arrived as the spearmen fled.  There was a flurry of arrows that drifted into the main halls, striking a furnace operator and killing a royal guard.  Sheena charged at them with lightning speed, felling several in a short time.  She chased down those that fled, killing all but one.  Another ringing of the bell sounded the end of the siege.

[LegoLord]

17th Hematite, Summer 109
   Ezum grumbled as she walked between the furnaces of the workshop sector.  She arrived at a glass furnace occupied by Barbarossa, the Grand Master Glassmaker. She frowned as she approached him.

   “Barbarossa, I’ve got some bad news fer ye.” she said grimly.

   Barbarossa paused in his work, his face pale.  “Gaius isn’t dead, is he?  I told, I said ‘you don’t have any business in the military, just look at all those other-’”

   “No, no, nothing like that.  All yer friends are fine.  No, ye’ve been elected mayor.”

   “But I thought Fireheart’s old girlfriend was mayor . . .”

   Ezum shook her head.  “One too many mandates fer giant lion bone items.  She wouldna’ listen ta me.  Keep that in mind, Mr. Mayor.” She nodded and walked off, leaving Barbarossa to ponder his fate.

[LegoLord]

18th Hematite, Summer 109
   Omnidum sat at a pump in the barracks, exercising.  She enjoyed working out at the gym.  She was working to further improve her strength when Ezum yanked her off the pump.

   “Here is yer crossbow!  Here is yer buckler!  Ye have Morul’s old office!  Get to work!”  Ezum shouted.

   “What?!” Omnidum shouted.

   “Yer the captain o’ the guard now, ye idiot!  Hop to it!  Ye need trainin’!”  Omnidum ran automatically for the archery range, her survival instincts working for her.  Not being Captain of the Guard was clearly not an option.

[Heron TSG]

I was hoping my namesake would live for the whole life of this fortress, but now he has become mayor! Well, hopefully he's not too demanding.

[LegoLord]

1st Malachite, Summer 109
   “Some migrants have decided to brave this terrifying place, knowing it may be their tomb.” Tenth reported to Ezum in her office.  “I saw them when I went to put a new sock in my cabinet.”

   “Terrifyin’?  Only a danger here if yer in the military.  Well, also if yer a noble.  But most people ain’t nobles.”  She stroked her beard thoughtfully.  “Ain’t it a given that where ye live is gonna be yer tomb?”

   Tenth looked uneasy.  “Well, yeah, but I am a noble, and I’ve heard you talking about Lord Lego.  I’m glad I’m not him, that’s for sure.”

   “Go an’ give ‘em a tour,” Ezum said, ignoring Tenth’s complaint.  “Shouldn’t be too hard fer ‘em, if memry o’ the mountain homes serves.”

* * * * *

   "Okay everyone," Tenth hollered, "Follow me for the tour!  This is the entrance, obviously . . ."

You heard the Dungeon Master, follow him for the tour.

[Heron TSG]

So on the matter of the Entombment of Bubbles, can he get a copper sarcophagus so we can remember he slaughtered people with a copper mace? 

[LegoLord]

Er . . . well, I hadn't been expecting his death, so he had no tomb.  He's already been interred.