It probably would have been a better idea to show your friend the scene in the LN rather than the anime one, since Frumple was speaking specifically about how it was worded and stuff.
Mm. Yeah, more or less. My primary complaint, really, would be drawing direct parallels to
torture. As I've noted, I've ran into outright torture in fiction significantly more than I would like to, and ZnT's prose (even the animated stuff, for that matter) does not mimic it, or particularly lean towards that. It does have shades of your average dysfunctional romance relationship (i.e. abusive as goddamn), but it doesn't nearly go that far, and is on the net (
especially on the net, as the frequency is somewhat muted for much of the series) what I'd call fairly normal for the genre. If you want to see
abnormal, you look to something like Domina no Do. Or probably don't.
To the more general discussion, don't mistake things -- most everything that involves a tsundere character displays characteristic abuse patterns (it's really hard to say they're actually in full out abusive relationships, though, especially in context of the shows themselves*), and anything involving that and slapstick (especially clumsily written slapstick) is going to push buttons. A lot of romcom slapstick
in general does, really.
Not stuff I'd recommend to an actual abuse victim. Fiction in general with romance involved is a freaking minefield when it comes to stuff like that.
*ZnT's actually a pretty good example of that, really. Insecurities, violence, and saito being a clumsily written harem protag aside, the main pair is written in context as more or less getting along pretty well as things progress (though that progression is made significantly harder by saito being said CWHP and louise's own character flaws) and the violent aspects just kinda' shrugged off. Relationship ends up being vaguely healthy, more or less, iirc. At least as tsundere-included anime romcom go.
The
reality, of course, is that
without mind control, a relationship like that would crash and burn like goddamn, probably incinerating significant portions of the countryside considering both the characters in question are what amounts to magical WMDs.