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Author Topic: Blockedlance - No More Stops Until Ragnarok!  (Read 432361 times)

Guy Montag

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Re: Urist Salvedangers the Dwarven Pol Pot (now with more Armok)
« Reply #435 on: May 02, 2009, 10:35:09 am »
Sure, Axe Lord Montague sounds fine. Assuming there is anybody left, it certainly looks like Blocklances is circling the drain.

There is something special about having the deranged Queen personally participate in the Dwarven Great Purges.
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MrGimp

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Re: Urist Salvedangers the Dwarven Pol Pot (now with more Armok)
« Reply #436 on: May 02, 2009, 01:11:47 pm »
Quote from: Guy Montag on May 02, 2009, 10:35:09 am
Sure, Axe Lord Montague sounds fine. Assuming there is anybody left, it certainly looks like Blocklances is circling the drain.

There is something special about having the deranged Queen personally participate in the Dwarven Great Purges.

Down the drain?  Not until I outlast Nist Akath in dwarf years.  haha  Nist Akath is at 40, Im at 28 unless you only count since the reclaim, in which case Im at 24 dwarf years.  So Ive got 12-16 years to go at a minimum before I can let these tortured dwarves rest forever.

Ill try to find an Ber/Armok worshipper for your guy, maybe I could make your guy captain of the Royal Guard?  The House of Montague.  Yeah, we need a house of Armok worshippers to balance out the Hosue of Erib!
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Thus ends the official written history of the fortress known as Boatmurdered. May their tortured souls rest in peace.

MrGimp

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Re: Urist Salvedangers the Dwarven Pol Pot (now with more Armok)
« Reply #437 on: May 02, 2009, 01:20:35 pm »
The deranged Jimm Whiskeredringed lay on the cave floor, dying of starvation.  With his last ounce of strength he carved a crude picture of Urist into the ground.  Urist...the dwarf that had killed him.  She had locked him in here and forbidden his food for just a bit too long.



Great...now who's going to pull the lever for the atom smasher?  Arrrggghh!!!

As Jimm's dwarven body gave way to death, Grigrak seperated from it.  Another vessel lost to Urist.  Grigrak floated unconsciously about the fortress, wandering towards its next host.

In other news, one of our dwarves was sentenced to impalement on spikes.  Somehow he managed to only lose an eye before running off the spikes and healing.  That sure is a whole lot of blood for just one eye.



The Eribite mayor has lost her mind along with the others.  She has sentenced Urist to 26 days in prison for violation of some stupid production order.



These Eribs love forcing Urists hand.  How could she respond with anything but violent murder?
« Last Edit: May 02, 2009, 03:53:30 pm by MrGimp »
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Thus ends the official written history of the fortress known as Boatmurdered. May their tortured souls rest in peace.

Tradanbattlan

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Re: Urist Salvedangers the Dwarven Pol Pot (now with more Armok)
« Reply #438 on: May 02, 2009, 02:02:04 pm »
Bum Bum Bummmmmmm
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Guy Montag

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Re: Urist Salvedangers the Dwarven Pol Pot (now with more Armok)
« Reply #439 on: May 02, 2009, 02:25:51 pm »
Captian of the Royal Guard would be rockin'. I picture him as a drunken, power-hungry factionalist. Like a stereotypical Soviet committee chairman.

Also, what the hell is Urist doing to all those stray animals?
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Jim Groovester

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Re: Urist Salvedangers the Dwarven Pol Pot (now with more Armok)
« Reply #440 on: May 02, 2009, 02:44:03 pm »
I wonder how Grigrak will suffer next. I can only hope it's a slow, painful death.
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Quote from: Jim Groovester on April 16, 2021, 04:58:54 pm
I understood nothing, contributed nothing, but still got to win, so good game everybody else.

MrGimp

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Re: Urist Salvedangers the Dwarven Pol Pot (now with more Armok)
« Reply #441 on: May 02, 2009, 04:02:04 pm »
Quote from: Guy Montag on May 02, 2009, 02:25:51 pm
Also, what the hell is Urist doing to all those stray animals?

Dwarven sexuality is not for us to judge!   ;D 

Besides, it happened under duress long ago while the fortress was falling apart back during the first tantrum spiral.  Queen Cog confronted her about it...I forget what page.  Page 3 or 4???  It was early on.
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Thus ends the official written history of the fortress known as Boatmurdered. May their tortured souls rest in peace.

Guy Montag

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Re: Urist Salvedangers the Dwarven Pol Pot (now with more Armok)
« Reply #442 on: May 02, 2009, 04:48:59 pm »
Ah, I forgot that she never actually got punished for that.

Better keep that stuff a state secret. Would'nt want that sort of nonsense end up in the fortress tabloids.
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MrGimp

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Re: Urist Salvedangers the Dwarven Pol Pot (now with more Armok)
« Reply #443 on: May 02, 2009, 05:02:01 pm »
Quote from: Guy Montag on May 02, 2009, 04:48:59 pm
Ah, I forgot that she never actually got punished for that.

Better keep that stuff a state secret. Would'nt want that sort of nonsense end up in the fortress tabloids.

Oddly enough she never got punished for it and it eventually went away.  She was supposed to get 126 days plus a beating.  I think it took 15 years....but its some dwarven statute of limitations I guess.
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Thus ends the official written history of the fortress known as Boatmurdered. May their tortured souls rest in peace.

MrGimp

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Re: Urist Salvedangers the Dwarven Pol Pot (now with more Armok)
« Reply #444 on: May 02, 2009, 05:02:55 pm »
25 Years!  Woo!!!



Spring of 229.  Urist has been at this fortress for 25 years.  This year will also mark the twentieth anniversary of Urist's ascension to the throne.  A grand spectacle was being planned, everyone knew it...but no one knew exactly what it was. 

In the meantime, there were gladiatorial fights put on by MadMonkey24...

http://mkv25.net/dfma/movie-1326-madmonkey24arenafight

It helped entertain the masses and remind them how awesome the fortress they lived in was.  It also reminded them just how deadly the military that watched over them really was.

Even the elven magic juju wasnt powerful enough to make us flinch.  They come against us with their fire and cannot even set our fortress abalze!  They are cut down like screaming women and children.

http://mkv25.net/dfma/movie-1327-bluebloodedelves

We also let down the drawbridge in the east to lure some elves into our cages.  We capture quite a few.  We have both goblins and elves now...I wonder who can kick whose ass?

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Thus ends the official written history of the fortress known as Boatmurdered. May their tortured souls rest in peace.

Jackrabbit

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Re: Urist Salvedangers the Dwarven Pol Pot (now with more Armok)
« Reply #445 on: May 02, 2009, 06:49:23 pm »
Goblins, duh. Even with fireballs, the elves suck plant stems.
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Aldaris

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Re: Urist Salvedangers the Dwarven Pol Pot (now with more Armok)
« Reply #446 on: May 03, 2009, 02:45:54 pm »
Cave river creatures + water + Elves + Gobbos + Booze.

The elves will shoot fire at the gobbos, causing the booze to explode into boiling liquid all over everything near 'em, the gobbos are there becasue they are gobbos, and the caver river stuff is just to make it all that more... interesting.
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Quote from: Little on January 23, 2010, 11:38:18 pm
but Baron Aqizzar had the firm advantage, battering Cthulhu with his Mighty Chin.
^Totally not out of context, promise.
The Liberal Crime Squad Community game, now with a Liberal Overdose of Liberally aplied Liberalism. -Liberally. (UBER-Hiatus, next update somewhere between now and 2012.)

MrGimp

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Re: Urist Salvedangers the Dwarven Pol Pot (now with more Armok)
« Reply #447 on: May 03, 2009, 07:52:31 pm »
Quote from: Aldaris on May 03, 2009, 02:45:54 pm
Cave river creatures + water + Elves + Gobbos + Booze.

The elves will shoot fire at the gobbos, causing the booze to explode into boiling liquid all over everything near 'em, the gobbos are there becasue they are gobbos, and the caver river stuff is just to make it all that more... interesting.

I can (and probably will) do all of that except the cave creatures.  Unfortunately I slaughtered them all.  I was gonna breed them, plus giant eagles, but I ended up slaughtering every FPS draining object I didnt need. 

But exploding booze is a must!
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Thus ends the official written history of the fortress known as Boatmurdered. May their tortured souls rest in peace.

MrGimp

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Re: Urist Salvedangers the Dwarven Pol Pot (now with more Armok)
« Reply #448 on: May 03, 2009, 07:59:13 pm »
Okay, its time to make a decision people, there is grumbling in the ranks of our military.  They feel that since NOT ONE military dwarf worships Ber Steelearthen that they have no reason to follow the Queen.  Only a few loyalists remain, joined by several cowards who do not want the Queen to hurt them.

What side will your dwarf be on???  Death in the temple or death fighting Queen Urist?  Choose now!  (your dwarf may or may not die, no matter what your choice is.  I guarantee nothing)

If you do not respond in time for 'the event' then your dwarf will be assumed to be among the traitors!!!

(Even if your dwarf isnt a military dwarf, vote anyways on whose side your dwarf is on)
« Last Edit: May 03, 2009, 08:09:47 pm by MrGimp »
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Thus ends the official written history of the fortress known as Boatmurdered. May their tortured souls rest in peace.

Madmonkey24

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Re: Urist Salvedangers the Dwarven Pol Pot (now with more Armok)
« Reply #449 on: May 03, 2009, 08:03:07 pm »
I will side with the Mad Queen.
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