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[Aqizzar]

Cheeetar, Dottering Old Woman is throwing a tantrum!
The spinning Cat strikes the Prosecutor in the torso!  It blows apart!
The Prosecutor has been struck down.
Inaluct, Judge, bangs his gavel on the dais for order!  It blows apart!
The dais has been struck down.

EDIT: Awesomesauce, sigg'd.

[Armok]

I said I was a witness but didn't get any PMs, but I DID state it in very uncrtain terms.

I'm a hobo, crazy, drunk.

[inaluct]

Okay, you're a witness now.

[Duke 2.0]

 I'm the semi-wealthy guy who undertakes in borderline illegal activities just to spite the lower-class.

 "Well your honor, while on my way to sue an orphanage for a little brat sneezing in my general direction from several yards away, I came upon a horrible sight: A homeless man! Being within a hundred feet would be horrible for my image! So while I was going through my pockets for some fake money to throw at him, I saw the defendant being murdered in the lot I was planning on demolishing and turning into a strip-mall! How can you make any profit with hobo ghosts in your strip mall? "

 I plan on doing good research for this role. Suggestions for morally questionable things would help.

[Cheeetar]

During lunch break, tell an assistant to bring you a baby.

[Boksi]

I'm a wannabe rockstar who seems perpetually drunk.

[Squeegy]

I see an open spot in the jury, I'd like to switch into it.

[Neonivek]

Ima going to drop out

[inaluct]

This means you also forfeit that argument that started this, and that 8 year old is getting the death penalty, or something like that.

Anyway, Penguin of Honor has been promoted to Ace Attorney/Head Defense.

[penguinofhonor]

I AM PHOENIX WRIGHT!

[Pandarsenic]

I plan on doing good research for this role. Suggestions for morally questionable things would help.

Class-action lawsuits.

[Squeegy]

The Jury is fairly Conservative.

Cthulu's chances are bleak.

[inaluct]

Yeah, but with Penguin of Honor, Ace Attorney (and only Penguin of Honor, Ace Attorney) on the defense, anything can happen!

Which reminds me; we need more defense people. Sort of. Maybe.

[Squeegy]

Nah, this is a rigged case, remember?

[inaluct]

Who says Cthulhu doesn't have ties to a rich family?