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[Warlord255]

Little Zefon sat up eagerly as his father came in, smiling wearily from the day's work. The candle on the table flickered in the small shift of air as the older dwarf closed the +wooden door+ behind him.

"All right, little one... ready fer yer bedtime story?" asked Goden, dropping himself into the -rocking chair- by the bedside.

"Yes, Papa, yes!" he replied, tugging his thin beard in every which way in excitement.

"Ooooookey, then. Which one'll it be tanight?" He turned to the bedside table, reaching down to run his fingers along the spines of the books, coming to rest on one. "How about 'Naps on Traps'?"

"OH BOY!" shouted Zefon.

"Alright, alright, settle down now..." With a deep sigh he cracked open the tome and leafed back to the first page, and began to read.



Everyone gets tired every now and again,
When the workday is done and the job's at an end,
But if ye've no bed and ye stop for a nap,
Remember you mustn't fall asleep on a trap.

Recall the poor story of Urist McNed,
Who hadn't a room or a bunk or a bed!
So he laid himself down on the warm floor instead,
And it popped out great sawblades that cut off his head!

Zefon applauded gleefully.

Exhausted to tears was poor Sibrek McBraid,
So she sat herself down for a few little dreams.
But the floor came alive and she found herself flayed
By a wong-tongling, whip-snapping whipping machine!

But don't think that that's all the gore that's in store,
Stay awhile and read on, as you'll find that there's more...

----

Dr. Suess style. Four lines per stanza, up to two stanzas per poster.

Do it. GO.

[Foa]

As Noble McNed went to bed, he neither notice the spider up ahead.
And poor old Ned was knocked dead in the head.
Then in the stealth of the night the cringing spider quickly got some binge.
As the spider's health died out so did the cringing dead Ned who got caught in a hinge.

As the story has unfolded, the story needs an end.
Like poor Nick the Dragon , a great one indeed, his life did, end.
With a nick in the neck, he hated the need, but he lost his lid, as it did him in.
Rampaging down the hall, as the walls knead, the Trap did him in, as did his loose lid.

[John Johnston]

When Bomrek's eyes were closed,
A flail tore off her nose!
But Cog (who stayed awake)
Escaped a sim'lar fate.

When Mosus had to yawn,
He swiftly met a saw!
But Udib slept in bed,
And got to keep her head.

[Teeto_K]

When Melbil Nilcog had patrolled too late
He found himself in need of java.
His vigilance failed on a pressure plate
And instead ended drinking up lava.

[Eldin]

Solon McMead, a brewer and baker,
Was tired after draining a tanker,
Instead of getting up to go to his bed,
He slept on the floor, and off went his head!

Solon's niece, little Urist the Miner,
Felt the winding down of her internal timer,
After channeling a moat, on her way through,
She nodded off, and was run through by a screw!

[Samyotix]

When Melbil Nilcog had patrolled too late
He found himself in need of java.
His vigilance failed on a pressure plate
And instead ended drinking up lava.

Growling and barking, wardog Sam fought
Kobolds and Goblins, like a good wardog ought
And soon was awash in blood and gob chunks
but then it happened - those filthy green punks
concussed Sam's brain with a kick to the nads (nuts?)
so Sam slept in a trap ... which ripped out his guts.

[Yag Alone]

Those are... "Beautiful as the chance encounter of a sewing machine and an umbrella on a dissection table."

[Kilo24]

Speardwarf Selsten Setnek did slink off to sleep
In a curious corridor close to a trading depot.
When the floodgate raised he was counting sheep
So he slept with the carp and the elves who were too slow.

Innok Zangin did curl up and tire
Between a ballista and several spirits of fire.
There would be two more lines to provide
But we can all guess as to how messily he died.

[PTTG??]

Quite lovely. And Dwarfy.

[Alexor]

This is UNACCEPTABLE

The poems should rhyme in the dwarven language. 

[juanoleso]

Can't sleep so here is what I came up with

Urist gathered plants as he hiked
And slept wherever he liked
Manager said "pull the lever"
And do it forever
Now urist's bed is a spike

Urist mcpeasant the poor sap
Fell sleep under a cage trap
His wife carried him slow
To the depot
Now he's slave to an elf chap

[Evaristo Carriego]

For sale: cave spider silk socks, never worn.

[JoRo]

Not trap themed, I'm sorry to say.

Bomrek McMoody cried out for shell,
but there was none to be found, on earth or in Hell.
With great heavy locks we bolted the door,
until Bomrek McMoody cried out no more.

Cog the Mason did his best,
and always built his walls from the west.
One sad day he walled himself in,
and when he was found he was just bones and skin.

[Kishmond]

They also need the same amount of syllables in each line.

[BradB]

Heh, some of these are awesome!