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[JoshuaFH]

So, lets see who's next *puts on reading glasses* hmm... Rucksackjack? best to PM him, methinks.

[LegoLord]

Slow down there, I'm not done yet.  Still got winter to go.

[LegoLord]

Okay, here's the last one.
Diary of LegoLord

14th Timber
Everyone has been upset at how there are no new clothes, as there old clothes are becoming threadbare.  Pig tails are no longer to be eaten so that there can be a sufficient supply of thread to make new clothing.

22nd Timber
A wall is being built around the interior of our moat, or at least the important parts of it.  It is to be made of rough rock, to make the fort look as menacing as the warriors within.  The unimportant parts of the moat are being floored over.

26th Timber
My ballista misfired today.  I’m told that a butcher and an engraver were killed.  Curiously, we now have exactly 125 dwarves now.  What an unusually nice, round number.  The blast shield for my siege weapon is now up for safety.

10th Moonstone
I was cutting wood today when I found a kid in my personal tree farm.  How he got there, I don’t know, and he won’t say.  He does say, however, that his name is Igor and that he wants to work for me.  I tried to play dumb, but he said that he had dug up my old diary while playing in the sand.  Then he said that every evil genius needs an Igor.  I gave up at that point and decided I wouldn’t throw him out.  He better do something useful at some point.

21st Moonstone
A goblin snatcher was caught at the gates.  Literally.  He’s stuck in the only cage trap in the area.  Lucky for us, that.  Goblins sure are stupid.

23rd Moonstone
Using the new walls as support, a fortified electrum arc is now being constructed.  To give our few marksdwarves an advantage, the fortifications will face inwards.  They won’t stop a siege, but now the can at least be of more help.

Later there was another snatcher, this time revealed by a woodcutter going out to work.  Fortunately, he took no children.

25th Moonstone
Yet another snatcher ran stupidly into the cage trap.  What is wrong with them?

15th Opal
The arch has been finished and is now being filled with combat quality ammo.  That means no bone or wood bolts, no arrows of any kind, and no darts.



16th Opal
Ambush!  They jumped one of our legendary woodworkers.  Hopefully he is smart enough to run back into the fort.

19th Opal
As it turned out, he didn’t have the brains.  He ran right for them and took a shot in the left arm.  He ran around awhile, getting chased by a duo of wrestlers, before he finally decided to face them.  He quickly cut the left leg off one and the right leg off the other before killing them both.  Kaiser tells me one of the bodies was cut in half at the waist.  Then he ran right back towards the marksmen, who shot him some more before he ran away.  They managed to get a few more shots at him.  Someone engraved a picture for me.




He was able to keep going with four bolts in him, one of which was going through his lung.

20th Opal
They finally managed to kill Mistem Relictrailed.  It’s really a shame.  I remember watching him work on that artifact birch door.

23rd Opal
The last of the ambusher was completely destroyed by the champions.  Not a single one managed to escape.  Hooray!

25th Opal
The Countess has had a baby girl.  I’d congratulate her, but she’s a noble.

Due to booze shortages, pigtails can now be brewed once more.

19th Obsidian
My personal wolf pack has grown by three pups.  Wonderful.

1st Granite, 243
Kaiser hasn’t been telling me much lately.  I’m not sure why.  Work on the wall protect my tree farm has been going slow, so I’ve made modifications to it; if I pull the lever in the Northeast corner of my room, another dwarf can build a way into my tree farm and build the wall for me without being able to get into my room.  I just hope Kaiser shows up soon to deliver the message.
Alright, here's the save.  Please don't let LegoLord starve, rucksackJack, but don't let her out of her room, either.

It's too bad there was no skeletal dragon like there was in d3c0y2's story.  That would have been fun.

[rucksackjack]

I'm sorry, folks--this rolled around at a bad time and I'm gonna have to pass the buck to the next person. Sorry for not notifying you sooner. 

[LegoLord]

Can I have another turn?

[JoshuaFH]

if koji is a no show, then it's my turn again!

[JoshuaFH]

So Qloos, is Koji a no-show? Did he PM you saying he was on it? Sorta in the dark here.

[Qloos]

Yes, your turn Chaotic.

[JoshuaFH]

Mind if I turn off temp and weather or anything else that can speed the game up? It's running a tad slow on my computer.

[JoshuaFH]

This is painful! I'm not kidding when i say the lag is bad. the game is running at about half speed the speed of previous turn. Last time it took a couple hours to get a season done, now it's taking the same amount of time to get one month done.

I'll still do it, i'm just sorry if it takes awhile to deliver the updates.

[LegoLord]

Try butchering animals.  That helped with my turn.

[JoshuaFH]

Really? cause you had alot of animals just running around. So i did that, helped marginally. Once again, very sorry if this takes awhile.

I'm doing something awesome to make up for the slowness though, it's way more awesome than than your shitty inward pointing electrum arch. Can't believe you used up all my electrum to make a crappy ammo room.

Also, i killed all your wolves lego, sorry.

[JoshuaFH]

ChaoticJosh the 2nd's journal, all of spring:

Well, Hell. Apparently the yearly raffle chose me as this hellhole's leader, again. I had abosrbed myself so diligently in my work, taking so much care of the metal production, that I had completely overlooked the horrible things the new leaders were doing!

No one's working! No one! everyone is just standing in the dining hall fucking around! What happened to the well-oiled factory that i whipped this place into?!

Looking around some more, I can see WHY no one's working, everyone's just living off the built up wealth and food! Their is nothing urgent to tend to, and this has made these people weak! The only thing that seems to still be healthy is the military, which is bigger and stronger than ever.

Within moments of declaring that i'm the new leader, someone spazes out and heads to a leather workshop. promptly producing a neat skirt. Someone's bound to probably feel pretty in it.



Goddamnit, I mean it, GODDAMNIT! I step outside, and theirs something new hanging over the entrance. Glaring brightly as it reflects the sun, i walk up to get a closer look, and on closer inspection i found it to be a giant hollow arch filled with iron bolts, with firing peepholes made on the wrong side! worst part though? It's made entirely of electrum! MY ELECTRUM! I can just tell that that loony-bin Legolord must have made this, seeing as how he's locked himself up in what appears to be an entirely new section of the fort, and also the arch has "Legolord's property, no touchy" written all over it. My hard sweat and tears went into making that electrum! I issued the orders and unearthed the ingredients! I made the finely oiled machine that smelted it! and he squanders it all on a collossal waste of space! What do we need something like this for? we only have one marksdwarf anyhow!

I'm gonna get back at that lunatic! I'm gonna get back at the lousy nobility that sent me to the madhouse to suffer! Yeah! i'll show'em! As long as i'm the leader, no one'll even question me! the lemmings! I'll have'em all build me a grand monument! So grand it'll overshadow everything done in this fort thus far! and i'll live like a king for the rest of my days within it. That'll show'em, i'll be the happiest little bastard those nobility ever saw!

I have something like 15 new mason's workshops built outside, and i order all the lazy assholes milling around that they're masons now! GET TO WORK! this monument isn't gonna be made outta fucking raw stone! it'll be made of blocks! fine blocks! the entire thing!

When everyone walks outside, i must have underestimated how long they've been down there as they start puking all over the place. disgusting!

I've decided that what we're building is a tower! I look at the sky and wonder how high i can build it! it simply must be the tallest tower that dwarf-kind can build! This is for ME, and it must be the tallest by far in order to overshadow everything else in this fort!

It's the 20th, and the elves have arived, we give'm some food in exchange for their cloth and other knickknacks. That's not exciting though, what is exciting the biggest goddamn set of ambushes i've ever seen has just been dealt with rather swiftly by our resident champion-squad.

I was under the impression that those gobbo fuckers would only send 4 squads at any one time, some sort of internal bureaucracy thing, but I'll be damned, FIVE squads showed up for this mother. They were all slaughtered, but the number of'em is just amazing! I stepped outside just to count the corpses. TWENTY-FUCKING-EIGHT! Twenty-eight ambushers were slaughtered! ha ha ha! Not a single one escaped too!

Heres something of a drawing of only a fraction of the carnage:


All my attention goes towards the tower! It will be finished promptly! I demand it!

however, horns from the east ring out. Signifying the arrival of blasted noble! I spy out from the highest vantage point and can clearly see from the pattern on his clothes that it's only the philosopher, the biggest pussy of all the nobles. For a moment, i was worried.


Work on the tower is going so smoothly! This will be no barren tower! it will be the best furnished building in this craphole! Their will be statues on every floor! and my bedroom will be on the highest floor! It will have windows too! Yes! a magnificent view of all the land! I'll have the best view in the entire dwarven kingdom! Even the king will envy me! I'll show him!

HA! Spring is almost done, and the tower is almost complete, It still needs to be furnished, but here we can see some dwarves finishing up the roof!


Is this the end of my monument? HELL NO! I'll build a second adjacent tower! Why? because when it's viewed from afar, it'll look like a "II"! get it?! That way, everyone'll know i built it, cause Chaoticjosh the 2nd built it cause it clearly looks like a "II" from afar! If i'm ever blessed with children, i'll let them live in it too!

[LegoLord]

Spot!  NOOOOoooooooooooo!  Oh hey, wolf meat!

Just to explain the arch, the idea is that goblins are allowed to pass under it, and are shot before the can fire back.

You'll never overshadow my arch, Josh.  Its shine goes for miles 

[JoshuaFH]

I might have to ask for some extra time, Qloos.

Alot of interesting things are happening though, it'll be worth the wait.

and to retort to Lego, I like how you've obsoleted the extensive and effective protective walling that the fort has with a plan that only works if you let the goblins into the fort.