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Author Topic: Your best artifact ever  (Read 304657 times)

PoodleIncident

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Re: Your best artifact ever
« Reply #1110 on: April 17, 2012, 04:57:58 am »
My best artifact... is something boring, I don't remember. What was impressive was the dedication behind it. Oddom O., crawled back and forth, across the entire fortress 4 times to achieve his vision...with a broken spine. He's never moved again, he just lays on a bed, quadriplegic.
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Schizotek

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Re: Your best artifact ever
« Reply #1111 on: April 17, 2012, 05:03:58 am »
Quote from: PoodleIncident on April 17, 2012, 04:57:58 am
My best artifact... is something boring, I don't remember. What was impressive was the dedication behind it. Oddom O., crawled back and forth, across the entire fortress 4 times to achieve his vision...with a broken spine. He's never moved again, he just lays on a bed, quadriplegic.

Have you read "Pain God" by Harlan Ellison? I suggest you do if you haven't.
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Imagine the will it took to create a fortress like this. And what have you elves built? Nothing. You can only loot and break. You're not dwarves!! You're just termites at Versailles.

It's not that I don't suffer, it's that I know the unimportance of suffering, I know that pain is to be fought and thrown aside, not to be accepted as part of one's soul and as a permanent scar across one's view of existence.

Vrakanas

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Re: Your best artifact ever
« Reply #1112 on: April 17, 2012, 12:57:45 pm »
My dwarf just went all Legendary Clothier.

He made a leather and sheepwool vest.

It showed a serpent rising out of the ground and attacking a dwarf.

Some little part of me wants to put it on and run around shouting "tunnel snakes rule!".

But I wont. That's my new sherrif's job.
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Quote from: SRD on April 23, 2012, 01:34:11 am
Must've been a menacing wooden dildo trap.

Morpha

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Re: Your best artifact ever
« Reply #1113 on: April 22, 2012, 02:39:25 am »
Quote from: Vrakanas on April 17, 2012, 12:57:45 pm
My dwarf just went all Legendary Clothier.

He made a leather and sheepwool vest.

It showed a serpent rising out of the ground and attacking a dwarf.

Some little part of me wants to put it on and run around shouting "tunnel snakes rule!".

But I wont. That's my new sherrif's job.
"McDoyle rules!"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CsNgRmsx-14
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Quote from: Gerottomo on May 03, 2012, 04:34:11 pm
That should be a new type of project, making a rug design in dwarf fortress (With accurate coloring)
"And so, after many deaths and much sacrifice, someone turned their fortress into a fully functioning self aware carpet that actively sought after sources of fresh blood."

The Giant Bat who decided an axe made a better weapon than claws:
http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=108229.30

allison

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Re: Your best artifact ever
« Reply #1114 on: April 22, 2012, 06:52:36 pm »
So I had a 4-year-old make a bracelet. Nothing really special, but...

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Orky_Boss

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Re: Your best artifact ever
« Reply #1115 on: April 22, 2012, 09:38:30 pm »
Quote from: allison on April 22, 2012, 06:52:36 pm
So I had a 4-year-old make a bracelet. Nothing really special, but...

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

That's definetly a d'awwwww moment if I ever saw one.

As for mine, they all tend to suck in terms of utility, so none spring to mind.
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Quote from: AWdeV on April 11, 2012, 04:06:39 pm
Shit! He's flatlining! Quick, get the Doctor in!

Doctor: Nah, I'm on break.

GavJ

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Re: Your best artifact ever
« Reply #1116 on: April 22, 2012, 09:54:35 pm »
This one!  Multiple pages of obsidian cabochons and pictures of itself.  Worth only a million or something though.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Cauliflower Labs – Geologically realistic world generator devblog

Dwarf fortress in 50 words: You start with seven alcoholic, manic-depressive dwarves. You build a fortress in the wilderness where EVERYTHING tries to kill you, including your own dwarves. Usually, your chief imports are immigrants, beer, and optimism. Your chief exports are misery, limestone violins, forest fires, elf tallow soap, and carved kitten bone.

SRD

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Re: Your best artifact ever
« Reply #1117 on: April 23, 2012, 12:20:40 am »
A shell hammer.
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Quote from: LoneTophat
EDIT: HOW DO I STOP THE BLEEDING!
SUPEREDIT: Nevermind. Bled to death ._.

Gamerlord

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Re: Your best artifact ever
« Reply #1118 on: April 23, 2012, 12:31:07 am »
Breastplate, helmet, greaves and 2H sword. All adamantine, all artifact, all from the same 7-person family of smiths, and one of new children from the family is being trained in swords. This child will be epic.
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JimDale

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Re: Your best artifact ever
« Reply #1119 on: April 23, 2012, 12:44:07 am »
Quote from: GavJ on April 22, 2012, 09:54:35 pm
This one!  Multiple pages of obsidian cabochons and pictures of itself.  Worth only a million or something though.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
The best part has got to be the image of the elf in fetal position in elf leather. Haha.
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SRD

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Re: Your best artifact ever
« Reply #1120 on: April 23, 2012, 01:34:11 am »
Must've been a menacing wooden dildo trap.
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Quote from: LoneTophat
EDIT: HOW DO I STOP THE BLEEDING!
SUPEREDIT: Nevermind. Bled to death ._.

Vrakanas

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Re: Your best artifact ever
« Reply #1121 on: April 23, 2012, 06:43:17 pm »
Quote from: SRD on April 23, 2012, 01:34:11 am
Must've been a menacing wooden dildo trap.

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Quote from: SRD on April 23, 2012, 01:34:11 am
Must've been a menacing wooden dildo trap.

CarpeDiem

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Re: Your best artifact ever
« Reply #1122 on: April 23, 2012, 10:27:33 pm »
Just got a solid gold anvil with some silly clear zircon decorations, I just thought it was cool because its an anvil... and its gold...
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floundericiousWA

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Re: Your best artifact ever
« Reply #1123 on: April 24, 2012, 12:53:16 pm »
Quote from: Gamerlord on April 23, 2012, 12:31:07 am
This child will be epic.
...decapitated by a novice goblin lasher equipped with a copper whip.

Sorry, just had to go there :-P 

Nice use of candy!!
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Ozfer

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Re: Your best artifact ever
« Reply #1124 on: April 24, 2012, 11:16:59 pm »
A hunter was crippled fighting a tiger, and his buddy carved it into a shield for revenge. It made me chuckle.
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