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[GlyphGryph]

Please?

I'm just tired of messing with settings, trying to get mods to work, so on and so on, and then NOTHING BAD HAPPENS. EVER.

Who do I have to kill to get someone to try and kill me!?

I haven't even gotten a siege, despite having absurd amounts of wealth, a population of 100+, and a seven year fortress in a terrifying biome that is apparently bereft of monsters?

What am I doing wrong that everything consistently goes right?

[Captain Mayday]

Lack of monsters: Is your world still containing megabeasts?

Lack of sieges: When embarking, is your chosen civ at war with anyone?

Finally, have you tried my Legendary Lands mod? It really should make the game much harder, and it has a self installer.

[Doppel]

In my latest fort the human liaison (spellcheck?) didn't have any legs (or close to) so apart from taking literally ages to reach my fortress entrance, he also then got captured in one of my cagetraps which made him go berserk and not much later simply die, the next year, before even having seen a single goblin ambush, the humans sieged me (some cage and weapontraps were enough to break them though, then again, traps are simply overpowered/unbalanced no matter the situation). So, i guess its mostly down to luck.

[Maggarg - Eater of chicke]

replace goblins with steel colossi.
giant fire breathing flying steel colossi.

[Zorgn]

replace goblins with steel colossi.
giant fire breathing flying steel colossi.

These are the things nightmares are made of.

[IndonesiaWarMinister]

replace goblins with steel colossi.
SKELETAL giant fire breathing CAMEL flying ADAMANTINE colossi SPIDER.

Fix'd

[peekama]

There was a race of goblins somebody posted in the modding forums. So much worse than ender's goblins.  If you can find those you won't be worrying about the game being easy anymore.

[Maggarg - Eater of chicke]

replace goblins with steel colossi.
SKELETAL giant fire breathing swimming  CARP/CAMEL/UNICORN/ELEPHANT flying ADAMANTINE colossi SPIDER/CAT.

Fix'd

Fix'd

[DJ]

Embark in a tropical terrifying swamp with a major river. Don't bring any stone. Everything must be aboveground, except for wine cellars.

[Ike]

SPIDER/CAT.

Something about Spidercat fills me with glee.  I need to go mod cats to have eight legs, eight eyes and shoot web.   

[Warlord255]

Game needs to be harder, period.

[Yanlin]

Spider cat, spider cat. Does whatever a spider cat does. Can it breed, till you lag? Yes it can. It's a spider cat. Yay he is the spider cat.

[Dogman]

Embark in a tropical terrifying swamp with a major river. Don't bring any stone. Everything must be aboveground, except for wine cellars.

To expand on this, only farm wheat crops and use cows/goats for livestock. Use the wheat for either beer, or refine it into flour and only cook biscuits with it.

[GlyphGryph]

Man, the Legendary Lands thing looks like just what I'm looking for... just sucks I can't seem to get it to work on my temperamental piece of crap computer. I'm gonna keep trying and tweaking things though.

Now, replacing goblins with colossi... that seems like it might be a decent idea...

Actually, does any know what the requirements ARE for a goblin siege? Because I've met every one I could find anywhere, and I've still got nothing but ambushes.

[Lord Licorice]

I've yet to do this on my own forts, but if you remove the [SNATCHER] tag from goblins, they siege instead of sending ambushers to steal children.  As others mentioned, though, if you're not seeing any goblins at all, it's possible they've been wiped out and/or you're not at war with anyone.