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Author Topic: HELLSCAPE  (Read 9298 times)

inaluct

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Re: HELLSCAPE
« Reply #15 on: October 05, 2008, 07:09:12 pm »

I embarked on it in that huge evil desert, and I got a really good embark scenario.  :(
I was hoping I would get jumped by flaming skeleton camels instantly, but nooooooo.
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StrayCat

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Re: HELLSCAPE
« Reply #16 on: October 05, 2008, 08:09:25 pm »

I've seen zombie horses, zombie gorillas, and quite an entertaining scenario involving a skeletal giant eagle that at all of my dwarves six z-levels down. No flaming zombie camels, though. Underground skeletal giant eagle, I hear some voices ask? Well, this is how it went.

See, I was on my fourth fort here, and I was quite annoyed by this time with being swarmed to death in multiple forts, granted though, I did tap into a volcano to see what was inside the first one.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I'd made a large circle about my initial camp in a terrifying mountain scorching volcano location, and I channeled, over, and over, and over again this perimeter. Aaaand whilst underneath (everyone was moved underground into rooms and removed the staircase to the surface so the only thing coming down would be in for a drop first) and lo and behold, I get a message about one of my miners. Being struck down. One of my two miners. Which was all I had. I zoom on over, and HOLY F***ING S***BALLS there's creatures here than can FLY. My ambuser can't do jack. Doesn't even hit it. And after the ambusher falls, everyone else gets picked off, with no where to run, and no where to hide. I can't wait to do that again.
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It takes a dwarf to use magma for snow shoveling

inaluct

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Re: HELLSCAPE
« Reply #17 on: October 05, 2008, 08:37:53 pm »

I keep getting normal camels...
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Erom

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Re: HELLSCAPE
« Reply #18 on: October 05, 2008, 10:10:25 pm »

Underground skeletal giant eagle, I hear some voices ask? Well, this is how it went.

I've had a giant eagle come down a stairwell before. Terrifying.
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StrayCat

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Re: HELLSCAPE
« Reply #19 on: October 05, 2008, 10:25:59 pm »

Inaluct: Wait a season. The gorillas swarmed me in summer, though I had seen (and ordered my dwarfs to do tasks far away from them immediately because I know undead doth not a friend make and I don't know how to keep my dwarfs away from certain areas) the  little- scratch that, BIG- buggers aforehand.

Erom: They can use STAIRS? Good GOD I'm tempted to start a mountain fortress in a high savage region now. Oh man, I've already got three forts running...
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It takes a dwarf to use magma for snow shoveling

Jetman123

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Re: HELLSCAPE
« Reply #20 on: October 06, 2008, 01:49:33 am »

One day, the Imperial Guard will suddenly appear on your planet and start conscripting your dwarves as the Dwarven Desert Brigade, as a Deathworld brigade. :D

I want to see a picture of a lasgun-toting, flak-jacket armored dwarf now.
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When dwarves want to commit suicide, then by Armok, they _will_ commit suicide, even if they have to spend the rest of their lives working at it!

StrayCat

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Re: HELLSCAPE
« Reply #21 on: October 06, 2008, 05:27:33 am »

Games Workshop: Feature Exists: Squats

OshilolnvmguiyzkkjoolaevenowLEAVE!!!1!
(Oh shoot, whoops, not what we wanted, really. Right, could you look that way for a few years? Thanks!)
KK, gaot eit!
(alright, got it!)
Feature Exists: Tau

(Oh, what, you didn't notice? They've cut off their beards so the Imperium doesn't swear itself into them "For the Greater Good of our Asses Not Getting Handed To Us By Their Beards", the Tyranids don't automatically leave the galaxy, the necrons go back to sleep, the eldar kill themselves because they can't let chaos eat them anymore, because CHAOS ITSELF would turn inside out and devour itself rather than contemplate those beards for another moment. The space beards would even make the ork boyz stop fighting across the galaxy.

Just to be sure no one suspected them, they painted themselves blue as well. They even lopped off a finger, even though that wasn't to disguise themselves. That was to make things more interesting.
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It takes a dwarf to use magma for snow shoveling

Jetman123

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Re: HELLSCAPE
« Reply #22 on: October 06, 2008, 05:41:39 am »

Games Workshop: Feature Exists: Squats

OshilolnvmguiyzkkjoolaevenowLEAVE!!!1!
(Oh shoot, whoops, not what we wanted, really. Right, could you look that way for a few years? Thanks!)
KK, gaot eit!
(alright, got it!)
Feature Exists: Tau

(Oh, what, you didn't notice? They've cut off their beards so the Imperium doesn't swear itself into them "For the Greater Good of our Asses Not Getting Handed To Us By Their Beards", the Tyranids don't automatically leave the galaxy, the necrons go back to sleep, the eldar kill themselves because they can't let chaos eat them anymore, because CHAOS ITSELF would turn inside out and devour itself rather than contemplate those beards for another moment. The space beards would even make the ork boyz stop fighting across the galaxy.

Just to be sure no one suspected them, they painted themselves blue as well. They even lopped off a finger, even though that wasn't to disguise themselves. That was to make things more interesting.

... I understood 50% of that. However, I laughed 150%. xD

What did you mean with the first part, though? I haven't heard of "Squats". Then again I'm a newcomer to 40k.
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When dwarves want to commit suicide, then by Armok, they _will_ commit suicide, even if they have to spend the rest of their lives working at it!

Osmosis Jones

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Re: HELLSCAPE
« Reply #23 on: October 06, 2008, 08:34:38 am »

A race of mutant humans (they evolved into dwarves basically) that kept their technology when the rest of humanity regressed. They got booted a few editions back.
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IndonesiaWarMinister

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Re: HELLSCAPE
« Reply #24 on: October 06, 2008, 09:30:41 am »

Take a squat figure into a Games Workshop press release and you're getting hammered by the Space Marine Cosplayers.

DAMN IMPERIUM!! US DESERT EAGLE REPUVLIK WILL DESTROY YOU!!! FOR SURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!.

BTW, try swapping Star Trek chars to Warhammer. They're gonna be destroyed INSTANTLY.
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Aqizzar

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Re: HELLSCAPE
« Reply #25 on: October 06, 2008, 04:43:09 pm »

A race of mutant humans (they evolved into dwarves basically) that kept their technology when the rest of humanity regressed. They got booted a few editions back.

"Booted" isn't quite strong enough.  They've been specifically described as being eaten by the 'Nids, or Chaos, or basically killed with fire and purged from any official memory.  When Games Workshop had real forums, people would get banned for just mentioning the Squats in any way.
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And here is where my beef pops up like a looming awkward boner.
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Gantolandon

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Re: HELLSCAPE
« Reply #26 on: October 06, 2008, 04:57:36 pm »

Quote
Code: [Select]
17: Snukangana, "The Passionate Holes", a cave

Wow... just wow... ;D
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Old-Man-Gator

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Re: HELLSCAPE
« Reply #27 on: October 06, 2008, 06:00:50 pm »

Hive fleet Kraken (?) ate the Squat homeworlds after an ork Waaaagh went through. Or perhaps it was the other way around.

Chaos had not very much to do with it.

Actually it was solely the tyranids of Hive Fleet: Plot Device. The orks are INNOCENT!
« Last Edit: October 06, 2008, 06:04:58 pm by Old-Man-Gator »
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StrayCat

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Re: HELLSCAPE
« Reply #28 on: October 06, 2008, 08:07:34 pm »

Hive fleet plot device my ass, Hive Fleet "We're Just Getting Goddamned Started" seems more apt. And there's been hive fleets before that, just oooold gene-stealer 1st edition RP and book stuff though. I'm talking Rogue Trader here. Ouroboros is one of the early ones I remember. The 'nids only started getting really noticed with Hive Fleet Behemoth.

That's because they bitch-slapped and cage-stuffed the Ultramarines. All of'em. They entirely wiped out First Company, their veterans- keeping in mind an ultramarine veteran is hundreds, maybe a thousand years old or more, and sometimes encased in a sarcophagus on legs carrying enough weaponry to take over a small country all by it's lonesome. On the Smurfs home-f***-planet. In the middle of a WARP STORM that killed most higher coordination between the fleet. The only reason the ultramarines haven't been utterly annihilated is that during the space battle above the Smurfs home planet, the crazy loons sent their flagship into the heart of the fleet and blew their ship to kingdom come, completely severing the Norn Queen's mind link between every tyranid.

And by the by? That fleet isn't stopped. Oh no. None of the Hive Fleet's've been stopped. They've just been slowed down, a bit. And these "Hive Fleets?" Call'em what you want, they aren't the real trouble. They're a combination of scouting party, vanguard, and colonists. And their -real- fleet, one most likely big enough to FILL all the space in a quarter of the galaxy. And that fleet, that devourer of galaxies?

They're running from something nastier than them.

Oh God I Love 40K.

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It takes a dwarf to use magma for snow shoveling

IndonesiaWarMinister

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Re: HELLSCAPE
« Reply #29 on: October 07, 2008, 06:40:37 am »

SO!
Remembah!
THERE IS ALWAYS A BIGGER FORCE, CHASING ANOTHER!
all is doomed
...
...
...
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