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[Zako]

Hells yeah! Thats REAL metal!

I'm proud of that!

[CaveBacon]

Warlord's Log:12th of Felsite 301
Our request for aid from our allies has proven fruitful.
The humans have sent one soldier already, and have alerted us by messenger-bat that two more are on the way.
We have hired Zak, the Dwarven Mercenary, whose steel armor and axe will prove invaluable.  His axe has some strange rippled patten on it though, hope it's not faulty metallurgy.
One of our number has risen to defend us against the Elven menace. Ko the macelizard seems to be a decent warrior, but as of yet, I haven't seen him do anything aside from brag about how many leopards he's killed.

We had a bizarre development today,
We spotted a humanoid figure approaching the town, holding something in the air.  Thinking it was another of our human allies, I rushed out to meet him, only to find that he was an elf, holding the severed head of one of his comrades.  "Hey!", he shouted, a gleeful smile on his face, "I heard you guys are going to kill a bunch of Elves!!! I'd like to help!" The degree of enthusiasm with which he pronounced the phrase "kill a bunch of Elves" convinced me not to order the markslizards to turn him into a pointy-eared pincushion.  I asked him what in the name of Death (which is life, in a word) was going on.  His response rendered me more surprised and confused than I was before I'd asked.

His story is that he was betrayed in some way by his people (he wasn't too specific), and upon finding a copper whip on an old battlefield (from one of General Quenir's raids, no doubt), decided it was time for some payback. He killed a guard in the wilderness, whom he then decapitated. With a whip. He then headed to the forest retreat of Blossommagic to try and kill everyone there.  After being pursued by a berzerk clothier and having several of his teeth shot out by an archer, he discovered that his revenge would require some reenforcements, so he ran away and came here looking to help us.

It turns out that the elves have heard tell of our plan, and are mustering their defenses.  That's the best intelligence we could get out of him. He just kept talking about which methods of torture he would like to inflict upon his fellow elves . He carries no less than 35 elf bones with him at all times (despite his apparent insanity, and inherent elfiness, I'm kinda starting to like him). As for the possibility of him being a traitor or spy planted by the elves, I find it remote.  No-one in their right mind would send such an unstable person as a spy, although these are elves we're talking about.
Zak doesn't trust him, and I'm not sure I do either but I'd best let him come along with the warband, rather than leaving him in town, for the sake of the peasant's safety.

[Flintus10]

i hope it is not too late to request someone

name:Flint
Proffesion:Marksdwarf
Personality:Flint is a blood thirsty marksdwarf who arfter going insane seeing his companions peppered with elven arrows in previous wars seeks a bloody revenge by what he sees(but nobody else does) as an ironic punishment for them using his own ranged weapons

[CaveBacon]

Here's Ee'nutcase's stats:




Here we get the whip.


Ee'nutcase was by far the most interesting adventurer to set up.

We now have (after Vactor, Rafal, and Shoruke are set up) a full warband.  Don't worry if you still want to join, the elves and their archers will provide us with plenty of fatalities.

Vactor and Rafal are built, and I'll get them to the town and post their stats tomorrow, along with Shoruke, then we'll start raiding the elves.

[Sparrow]

Ima be a dwarf boltslinger.

Name:Sparrow
Proffesion: Marksdwarf.

[Tafferling]

Ee'nutcase was by far the most interesting adventurer to set up.

Glad to have contributed!
The missing teeth were genius, and how on earth did you find a copper whip?On the ground?In the middle of an elf encampment??...

Oh god ...a COPPER whip... I'm going tO KILL ALL YOUR SUPERFICIAL DERM CELLS YOU HATEFUL ELVES! Before being overpowered by a thresher...

[WorkerDrone]

Stryke "Here I come to save the day-*OOF!*" *Arrow in the arse* "Damn! I told you this would happen!"

Stryke, Human Swordsmen has bled to death!
The dwarf misses!
The dwarf misses!
The fracking dwarf misses already!
The Macelizzard has been struckdown.
It is afternoon.

[CaveBacon]

The copper whip is from one of my previous raids against the camp, with my adventurer leadinng a warband of lizardmen.  The elves killed a few lizardmen lashers, and their gear dropped on the ground.

(Lizardmen build everything out of copper, by the way)

Oh, and that isn't an elf encampment anymore, there aren't any elves left there except for one peasant who told me about how his uncle married an unknown creature.
But don't worry, there are two more elf encampments left for this civ, that should give us plenty of entertainment.

[WorkerDrone]

Or death. Don't forget the death.

[CaveBacon]

Yeah, perhaps that phrase is more accurate if you replace "entertainment" with "fun".


I have the warband all retired in the same town, I have stat/inventory screenshots for Vactor, Rafal, Shoruke, and the warlord, and I'll post them if anyone's interested in seeing them.

[CaveBacon]

Warlord's Log: 4th of Sandstone 301
The door to the Mead hall burst open, and a armored human strode through, wielding a shield in one hand, and a large hammer in the other. "I heard 'dere vas elves to keel! Count me in!"
"Ya!" contributed another human, now struggling to fit a ridiculously large iron polearm through the mead hall's doorway. "Ve haf suffered there vining about us chopping down ze trees for too long! It is time for action!"

"Well I'll be Boatmurdered!*" shouted Zak (I say 'shouted' although it was at the volume level of normal dwarven conversation) "It seems the Warband has finally assembled! Time to plant me axe in some Elven skulls!"  This elicited a malicious chuckle for Ee'Nutcase, who was sitting in a corner sorting his collection of elven bones.

"What of the two marksdwarves?" inquired Ko.
Ah, the Marksdwarves" I responded, "I have received a messenger bat indicating that they have been delayed, they are unwilling to make the journey here without a melee weapon user to escort them, and it may be several weeks or months before they arrive."

"We should wait for them." stated Ko "We can't go to fight the elves without ranged weapons, it would be suicide!"

"No!" shouted the human hammerman "Ve valked for a veek to get here, ve vill vait no longer!"

"We cannot yet mount a full-scale offensive," I responded, "We have only seven soldiers, and they have a full encampment of elves.
But we cannot allow them much more time to rally their forces, we will attack their scouts in the area around their outpost, forcing them to increase their patrols, and draw forces away from their main encampment.
Then once they are sufficiently spread-thin, we will sneak around behind their encampment and make our attack."
"You humans seem eager to fight, you will go with Ko, and kill a few elven scouts, Zak, Ee'nutcase, and Stryke will form the second raiding party."
"As for archers, I will see about recruiting a bowman from among the villagers here, I have watched them hunt, and there are skilled markslizards among their ranks."

There were nods of agreement from around the room, "Alright then, it is agreed" I announced, "The first group will set out tomorrow."

* Dwarven expression of surprise, I asked Zak where the phrase came from, but all he said was something about Elephants and magma and "Operation Fuck The World". Between him and Ee'Nutcase I am learning that asking questions to mammals and expecting a compreshensible answer is like fishing for carp, you are more likely to get thrown in the water than hoist out anything useful.

</Story>
The marksdwarves will be added to the next raid, to reaplce the inevitable casualties.
The purpose for the skirmishing (killing the scouts) is to make sure that the Humans and Zak become hostile to the elf civ for the main attack.
Shoruke will be added to the warband for the first attack.

[Rafal99]

Can i see my character please?

Hope his hammer will bring him glory!

[CaveBacon]

Here's Rafal!

[Rafal99]

I like him!

Btw. Large roaches? How did you know i like bugs? O.o

Also nice collection of jewellery. He killed all that hawks and cheetahs in the way?

[CaveBacon]

Yep, in this mod, you wind up with SOOO many random encounters with hawks.
It's a good opportunity for starting adventurers to hone their weapon skills, though.

Anyway: an update!

Vactor's log: 5th of sandstone 301
We haven't even left town to go fight the elves, and already the day has started with slaughter.
Ee'Nutcase was attacked by a monitor lizard this morning, he managed to remove its right front leg with his whip
At roughly the same time, the town's high priest envenomated a hawk and wrestled it to death.
Immediately after Ee'Nutcase killed the monitor lizard, Rafal was attacked by a cave bat, which his maul made short work of.

What is it with this town!?

Immeadiately after all this, a priestess killed two montior lizard, gouging out one's eyes, and biting the other in the stomach.

Sheesh! I'm glad the Lizardmen are on our side.

Shit, Then I got attacked by monitor lizards! Got knocked over and shaken around a bit, then stabbed both with my pike. And they died.

Finally met up with Ko and Rafal, We're off to go kill some elves.

Rafal splattered several hawks and a monitor lizards along the way, I continue to be in awe of his hammer's ability to send things flying.

7th of Sandstone, 301
We've been wandering around in the woods for two days now, and still no sign of elven scouts. weird.

Only one thing left to do now, we're going for the forest retreat, we'll make them afraid enough to post scouts in the wilderness.

We walked around for a while around the encampment, when we saw an elf craftsman run out in a big hurry, what he was hurrying for we'll never know, because I stabbed him with my pike.
Which stuck in his leg, then he grabbed me by my ear, and punched me in the hand! Ow!

Thankfully, Ko beat him unconscious with his mace, and then Rafal, well, I think this illustration will explain it better.


We had to fight some other elves and a hawk on the way out, but we made our escape with out being shot!

Verdamt! How many times have I told Rafal not to pummel me with elves!


Ver-double-damt! I think he's doing it intentionally!


Well, finally returned home with three dead elves, three dead monitor lizards, more dead hawks than you can shake an Iron Pike at, and not so much an an arrow wound.  All in all, a successful voyage.