A-yup.
In case LASD wants to know, his agility penalty applies to agility
dodge and his act depended on main agility.
Everyone ph34r korora, except the next turn.
------------
Turn 24 ------------
Having awakened, I try to sneak out of the inn and head towards the keep. Being alone isn't very safe right now.
| You walk to where you remember the stairs to be, but find them destroyed, crushed by a random misfired catapult stone. The only way to the keep now is either up… or
down…
I'll attempt to enter a strange mood!
| Trying to take inspiration from a working dwarf smithy, you sit down next to him and watch. You watch for a while, and become entranced by his movements. You suddenly realise you are falling somewhere, falling inside of yourself! You are surrounded by darkness, for a moment everything is black. Then, suddenly, your mind is taken by a clear vision! You MUST do it! You will not stop at anything! You run off, charging like a stampede of war elephants, running down a few dwarves that got in your way, down to the stockpile floor, then lower, and return with various assorted materials, some of them forcefully pried from posessions of other people in the keep. You throw the smithy-dwarf out of his workshop (looking at you, he doesn't even protest), and plunge into a crafting orgy, melting, casting, hammering, engraving, encrusting, polishing! After a (quite extensive) period of time, you finally stop. You feel that after such toil, you could probably fork out longswords by dozens per minute. You look around and see several dwarves standing around you, cheering and applauding violently. You look down on your creation...
| Taking up almost the entire breadth of the workshop, lying on the floor before you is a massive,
massive,
massive sword. It is three meters long, 1'3'' (~40cm) wide, and
dazzingly bright. Its fine steel has been polished to reflect light like a mirror. Its one edge is curved, jagged at the hilt, the other is straight and so sharp it could probably slice adamantine blocks like salami. Down the center of the sword, which is at least 2'' thick, runs a hollow slit 3'' wide, in which yeat another, smaller and straighter sword is concealed. The entire surface of both swords, except of course the sharp cutting edges, is finely engraved with uncountable images, among which the launching of the Challenger, world war II, a nuclear explosion (the dwarves seem particularly happy about this one), a trainwreck, and a rotary excavator. The hilt itself (being at the same time the hilt of the smaller sword) is decorated with gold and emeralds you can only assume you've taken from someone, arranged in beautiful patterns, and the handle is woven with three lines - one is a scaly snake with two small rubies in the eyes, and two seem awfully like DNA strands. You get a feeling you could decipher the human genome if you looked closely enough. The guard of the hilt is exquisitely detailed as well, but right down the senter of it, spanning the breadth of the sword, is a solid rectangular golden plate, with the single word: "ASHCRAVER" deeply embossed onto it. The entire thing is so immeasurably brilliant, you almost don't want to touch it fearing it'll stick to your hand and corrupt you like some magic ring. Overcoming this fear, you pick it up. Despite its size, it is relatively lightweight, relatively, of course, to anything else so large and made of steel. You are pretty sure there's no room to swing it here, and can't imagine how you will be carrying it around. Still, you happily take it for yourself, to the visible disappointment of the dwarves, even though none of them dared to oppose you. In addition to having the sword, you suddenly feel agile and strong like you never were in your life (of which you only remember the several hours since you woke up in the cube). You marvel at this development, and just stand like that for a while, admiring your creation and your new abilities.
(HOT DAMN!!!! No way I'm letting this go unpunished.
You will spend the entire next turn standing and admiring your creation, though I'll let you choose any specific point to admire. Oh, you're now in posession of a weapon with a +2 to damage, and a +1 to hit, though with a -1 to strength and agility rolls because it's heavy, in addition you get +1 on all strength and agility rolls, compensating for that. You are also a Legendary Weaponsmith now. Oh, btw, wall of text warning.)
I'm going to try to hover above the ground slightly. Maybe 20 centimeters. Preferably, this will also allow me to move without having to push myself like an astronaut in freefall.
| As you focus and try to levitate, a sudden lurch of force pushes you ankle-deep into the ground. -1 movement and dodge.
I bash shorty in the leg with my trusty war pants!
Which war pants? The leggings are not like pants of trousers, they're "ankle-wear". Therefore, you're going to do something unthinkable…
| In a sudden fit of insanity, you take off your underwear and run out toward the wounded elf! He's quite shocked by your appearance, not to mention the
manner of your appearance, and stays shocked until you deliver a whipping blow to his legs with your pants!
| The elf jumps sideways, but the pants wrap around his ankle! He falls! You pull the elf's leg with all your strength!
| You tear your pants into shreds. The elf remains on the ground, lying on his side, either shocked or stunned, he still doesn't understand which. The rain washes the vomity blood off of you.
I grab elfzilla by the head and crush it like a rotten melon!
| You jump back onto elfzilla's body, grab its head with your large meaty arms (or, rather, your armor's large meaty arms) and
SQUEEZE!!! | The beast moves its head, and your powerful squeeze misses and instead squeezes the rock that hit the thing just before!
| The rock cracks, and crumbles into pebbles. The beast's ugly whats-left-of-the-face is staring right at you.
i bash the wounded elf in the lower body
| You are quite enraged at the elf getting away. Spotting him on the ground near the shop, you
hurl your maul straight at his head!
| The maul strikes the elf clean into the chest! His ribcage gives off a very pleasant (to your ears)
CRACK, as it meets the entirety of the steel maul's momentum.
| But the damage turns out to be insufficient. The elf sure is in pain, but far from dying.
I persuade some peasants to carry me to the upper floors.
| Through a combination of sign language, mimics, and sheer yelling power, you manage to tell a group of hauler dwarves that you want to get upstairs. Having understood your message, they converse for a while, then walk tord you, with happy, but ever so slightly suspicious smiles on their faces...
After telling my sidekick to stay out of sight of the keep and asking him what his name is (referring to him as "sidekick" is getting old fast), I dust off my robe and put it and the sandals on.
| As you dress yourself, you ask your rather confuddled companion what his name is. He stands up and replies, "Elica Larifera". The translator refuses to give a direct translation of the words, seemingly passing them off as a personal name that is best left untranslated. Acknowledging his name, you then tell him to stay out sight of the keep, to which the elf somewhat reluctantly agrees.
Ifhe is still alive and not healed I will heal him without TK. I will also be standing over him at the same time.
He's actually both alive and healed, and the arrows have stopped, so your action is a teensy bit pointless. Instead you'll make the other elf unable to flee by breaking his legs.
| Walking up to the elf on the ground (he's lying on his back), you mercilessly pound at his knees with your iron heels.
| With a sickening
crunch!, the elf's knees suddenly started facing backwards. He screams in pain, rolling over and clutching at his mangled legs.
(AI) I examine the surroundings, trying to find out what happened.
| Using the old catchphrase "time's a-wastin'!", you run towards the pool, as it seems to have been the epicentre of the event. A few times you feel air gushing past you, but give it no heed, until suddenly running face-first into an invisible
column.
| Your nose is broken and bleeding, your forehead and chin are bruised, but your teeth are luckily intact. Suddenly you see your own blood hanging in midair, trickling down an invisible surface. You suddenly realise that everything in this, rather wide, area, was turned
completely invisible. The elves must be like yourself, and only see themselves. What you don't understand is the lack of sounds, as the stranded elves would no doubt be calling out to other elves. Then it hit you that whatever affected you, and them, affected more than just
vision.
| Suddenly you realise that you are getting angry, angry at seeing your own blood, at feeling pain. After a momentary struggle with your mind, the rage subsides.
------------
NPC Actions:
This elf has pale green hair, and wields rather battered shield of wood. Morale down. Both legs viciously mangled.
He's quite uncapable of any coherent actions at the moment.
This one was wielding a shortsword, and is slightly shorter than the rest.
Astonishingly assaulted by an underwear-wielding warrior, the elf is slightly shocked, but no so shocked as not to try and run away.
| He picks himself up and tries to run, but the marksdwarves on the keep unleashed an entire barrage onto him!
| He's quite thoroughly perforated. A few heavy bolts went clean through his abdomen, several more are stuck in his limbs, one hit him in the upper body.
| Miraculously, he does not die on the spot. His body is quite ravaged, and he's seriously bleeding.
| He falls to the ground, unconscious.
Rather dead at the moment.
Dead. Beheaded in a rather messy way.
Dead. His past leg injury is not bothering him anymore.
Elica is a swordself. Recently hired by Frelock. He's armed with a wooden longsword, and dressed in (somewhat pierced) green-grey close-witting clothing with scarce leaf-shaped decoration.
Ordered by Frelock to stay inside the shop, he does so, at the same time trying to procure some form of protection for his frail frame.
| Despite his best efforts, and quite unsurprisingly, he is unable to find any armor shaped for an elf in a human town governed by dwarves. He kicks a helmet in frustration and stubs a toe.
This is a massive, ten meters high beast made of elven bodies. It's mindless now, but still driven by rage and desire for flesh. It is, for all intents and purposes, a giant elven flesh golem. Currently impaled on the wreckage of an apartment building. Blind, face is a bloody mess, a wooden splintery scimitar stuck into the socket. It has a -4 to dodge, -2 movement, but still +1 against all damage, except for the head where its skull is cracked.
| The beast opens its maw and tries to bite Jay Kayell! He barely dodges the attack.
Not overly impressed with the catapult, the dwarves fire their ballistae again.
| This time they miss completely.
The group of four conspicuously happy haulers take LASD up on their arms, and he rides them in this manner up until they ascend a stair, at which point the four turn around sharply, and dump LASD back onto the staircase!
LASD Agility:[3] LASD manages to balance out on the tips of his toes, flailing his arms wildly, and does not tumble down the staircase as the dwarves no doubt intended. Seeing their plan foiled, the four quickly run off on their various businesses.
------------
Status after turn:
Boksi: Standing upright, out on the street beside the armor shop.
Wearing a reddish-black jacket of Karl Moebius leather, underwear, and slightly torn jean shorts. Wielding a
masterwork steel halberd. Holding a wooden arrow covered in andrea's blood.
Unharmed. Skin and flesh is of greyish color.
Abilities:
Basic TK Manipulation.
Basic TK Healing.
Big Bully. Special status:
Carbon Flesh Interweave.
Can only speak goblin.
Activated Visual Omnisensor.
Buried ankle-deep in the ground.
andrea: Standing upright out on the street beside the armor shop.
Wearing underwear and
fairly comfortable greyish trousers. Also wearing a
armor set: -Iron splint-mail-, a shirt of leather, Bronze plated greaves,
<<Iron high boots>>. Owns a +Steel maul+, that is currently some distance away from him.
Unharmed.
Abilities:
Shrapnel Self.
Basic TK Healing. Additional status:
Blood Debt to God of War and Artifice. korora: Standing upright on the third floor of the keep.
Wearing underwear, and makeshift bra-scarf clothing. Also wearing the
armor set:
<<+Iron breastplate+>>, a soft leather shirt, an Iron helmet, some hard leather greaves and -Aluminum high boots-. Owns an Iron handaxe and a -Black bronze warhammer-, both on the floor for now. Wields
The Ashcraver.
Legs and arms bruised.
Abilities:
Mighty.
Extremely Agile.
Basic TK Healing (!). Extra:
Entranced by Artifact.
A massive, massive, MASSIVE sword. It is three meters long, 1'3'' (~40cm) wide, and dazzingly bright. Its fine steel has been polished to reflect light like a mirror. Its one edge is curved, jagged at the hilt, the other is straight and so sharp it could probably slice adamantine blocks like salami. Down the center of the sword, which is at least 2'' thick, runs a hollow slit 3'' wide, in which yeat another, smaller and straighter sword is concealed. The entire surface of both swords, except of course the sharp cutting edges, is finely engraved with uncountable images, among which the launching of the Challenger, world war II, a nuclear explosion, a trainwreck, and a rotary excavator. The hilt itself (being at the same time the hilt of the smaller sword) is decorated with gold and emeralds you can only assume you've taken from someone, arranged in beautiful patterns, and the handle is woven with three lines - one is a scaly snake with two small rubies in the eyes, and two seem awfully like DNA strands. You get a feeling you could decipher the human genome if you looked closely enough. The guard of the hilt is exquisitely detailed as well, but right down the senter of it, spanning the breadth of the sword, is a solid rectangular golden plate, with the single word: "ASHCRAVER" deeply embossed onto it. The entire thing is so immeasurably brilliant, you almost don't want to touch it fearing it'll stick to your hand and corrupt you like some magic ring. Overcoming this fear, you pick it up. Despite its size, it is relatively lightweight, relatively, of course, to anything else so large and made of steel.
chaoticag: Standing upright, out on the street near the armor shop.
Naked. Wielding a useless chunk of wood that was the handle of his scimitar not long ago. Holding the pieces of an
armor set: +Steel Chestplate+, -Copper chainmail-, Aluminum cap, hard leather leggings and
<<Copper plated boots>>.
Concussive damage to internal organs, large bruise on left upper arm. Bruised back.
Abilities:
Basic TK Healing.
Gantolandon: Standing upright in the cellar of the tavern.
Wearing underwear and a thin silky sweater. Covered in dried vomit. Right foot covered with elven blood and brains. Holding a paperclip and a nice pair of white socks. Wielding an Iron dagger.
Face and most of the body bruised. Hands pierced by numerous splinters. Left wrist sprained. Nasty scratch along the head. Minor bleeding.
Abilities:
Basic TK Healing(!).
Frelock: Standing upright on the street near the armor shop.
Wearing underwear, a
somewhat dirty <<*Giant cave spider silk robe*>>, and +hippo leather sandals+. Wielding a Steel Quarterstaff and a -Small Iron throwing knife- as a backup weapon.
Unharmed.
Abilities:
Slightly improved strength.
Meagerly improved agility.
Can be cautious while calm.
Improved TK Healing II(!). Special status:
Activated Selective Translator.
Kashyyk: Standing upright on the street near the armor shop.
Naked. Wielding a -Steel Greataxe- and a makeshift Willow Buckler.
Flesh turned into iron, three arrows sticking out of abdomen, right leg, and left shoulder, but no serious damage is sustained.
Abilities:
Enrage Other. Enrage Self.
Basic TK Healing. Special status:
Activated Selective Translator.
Steel scales. Extra:
Rollerblades in the forearms. Rooster: Standing upright near what was the ruined temple.
Wearing underwear. "Wears" illusion clothing (white garments, white robe) seen only by him.
Nose broken, bleeding, forehead and chin bruised.
Abilities:
Improved Intelligence.
Basic TK Healing.
Power of Trickery (+). Special status:
Blessing of Peace.
Beyond Invisible.
Beast Within. Extra: Doesn't know who he is, and calls himself Red.
LASD: Standing upright on the third floor of the keep.
Wearing underwear, and a
white/pink/yellow suit and top hat made of underwear. Also wearing the
armor set:
<<+Iron chain Cuirass+>>, -Iron chain gloves-, Iron chain greaves, and Iron low boots. Wielding a
*Aluminum tower shield* Battered head and upper body(back). Bruised left foot. Sprained right wrist.
Abilities:
Power of Peace. Special status:
Peacekeeper.
Jay Kayell: Out on the street, standing near Elfzilla.
Wearing purple stretchy shorts. Useless shreds of underwear on right arm. Wielding a +Iron flanged mace+. The armor is armed with a collection of axes and swords, and its steel fists as well.
Unharmed.
Abilities:
Novice Wrestler.
Basic TK Healing.
Blood of the Blood God.
Blood Rage. Special status: Wearing
Improved Corpse-steel power armor.
---------
Environment:
Tavern: Two-floor building. The door is blown out, the doorframe is torn out as well. Amid the room is a large barricade of broken furniture, elven corpses and trash. Half of the building's roof is gone, most of it is now smashed into the floor. A large hole is broken into the storage cellar. Another hole is busted through the building's wall. There're some weapons stuck into the first floor's ceiling. The building houses your enter/exit point.
Human/Dwarven Capital: Large city on the outskirts of hell knows where. Holds a modest amount of homes, from hovels to two-floor apartment buildings, a set of shops, a temple, and a keep. Currently being surrounded by a verily horde of elves. The dwarves are mounting a large defence using siege engines atop the keep.
Food store: Square one-floor building with long tables laden with salted and fried meats of all kinds. There's a single wide table at the far end, with a chest on top of it. There's a mighty fine hole broken through the ceiling.
Cloth store: Rolls of cloth and various cloth, silk, and leather articles of clothing are on the many shelves inside this building. There's a single wide table at the far end, with a chest on top of it. The entire building is barely standing, most of its roof is collapsed. There's a pile of elf-paste near the building, and some elven corpses.
Armor store: Everywhere in the shop various pieces of armor are thrown about, shields of different sizes litter the floor, and arrayed under the now-broken shelves and tables are enough various boots to outfit a battalion. At the far end of the building, there is a single wide table. The heavy chest is on the floor, broken, a large supplement of coins from it now covers the floor.
The Keep: Large four-floor building. The first floor is almost devoid of furniture. A lot of civilians are huddled together in groups all over the floor. At least a dozen and a half guards are also there. The second floor is a massive stockpile of wood, metal, and stone. Dwarves constantly lug the materials to the upper floors. The roof of the keep is fortified with ballistae and catapults.
The Temple: Tall and proud, beautiful building of white marble, a solid first floor surrounded by columns is supporting several ring-shaped floors held up by beautiful marble supports. A deep pool of shiny, clear water can be seen inside the building. Well, it probably was like that. The entire thing has recently tried to rise up in mighty wrath as a gigantic statue of a carp, but failed miserably and broke to pieces. Afterwards, the overpowered Rooster single-handedly sent the whole place into oblivion along with the elves, who now cannot be seen, heard, or even smelled by anyone other than themselves.
------------
Background: [4] After all the struggling with the staircase, Gantolandon notices a tiny hatch in one of the walls of the cellar… In addition, it is now VERY clear that the elves are advancing. In a few more minutes, they will be clearly seen from the keep.