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[Terrahex]

I'll take a turn. PM me.

[Tlc2011]

I think this has finally died.

[noodle0117]

Well you just brought it back from the grave, even if only to crumble back to dust again.

[weq15]

from the op

It's a bit harder to guard against lack of interest, but any time I can't contact any of the players, I'll run a year and keep the thread updated.  I'll maintain the fort even if no one reads it.  Ha!

so DO it

[Sizik]

Last Active: April 13, 2010, 05:51:09 am

Edit: Latest post in this thread (second latest overall):

Ok, I updated the player list with all the new folks.

Sorry, I get distracted from DF sometimes and forget to check this stuff.

[Spish]

Ooh, neverending eh? I really like the idea behind this, I'm guessing the current state of deadness has a lot to with the fortress being really freaking outdated. Shame, but it's not like we can do anything about all this damn progress. Someone should really do a sequel next stable version we get, even though it'll probably suffer the same fate in the end.

[goukaryuujin]

Any fate is a fate worth achieving, no? The fun is in getting there after all. 

[ragman le bon]

This was the sequel

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=61121.msg1388228#msg1388228

[Sizik]

King Kingler slept. It had been a long day in the mountainhome Zilirîton, known in the common tongue as "The Eternal Halls". There were mandates to impose, criminials to be hammered, and waterfalls to admire. However, he didn't sleep for long...

"wooooo"

The king turned in his Gneiss bed. Did he hear it? Perhaps I have to be louder...

"Wooooooo!"

"What was that?" The king awoke, startled by a distant howling noise. "Huh, must be a party in dining hall," said the king, as he went back asleep. Dammit, I was sure it would work that time. Time for plan B.

"WOOOOOOOO!"

The king awoke a second time. "Alright that does it. Time to hand out some hammOHMYÄS!" exclaimed the king, as he saw a ghastly apparition before him.



"WHO DARES DISTURB MY SLUMBER?" asked the ghost.
"I was about to ask the same thing," replied the king.
"Damn, wrong line. Umm, oh yes, it was HAVE FEAR MORTAL, FOR DOOM IS UPON YOU AND YOUR FORT! THE GODS HAVE GROWN TIRED OF THE STAGNATION RAMPANT WITHIN THESE HALLS, AND HAVE MANDATED ITS DEMISE."
"Oh a mandate eh? Well I guess there's nothing we can do about that. I'm off to bed then."
"NO WAIT *ahem* No wait, you're supposed to ask if there's anything you can to to save yourself."
"Well no one ever told me that. Out with it then."
"You *ahem* YOU MUST COMPLETE FOUR MEGAPROJECTS, ONE FOR EACH SEASON, SUCH THAT THE GODS' BOREDOM IS APPEASED."
"Just any old megaproject, or..."
"SILENCE, I'M NOT FINISHED TALKING YET! THE FIRST MEGAPROJECT YOU MUST COMPLETE IS AS FOLLOWS: MAKE THE TAMED WHEEL BREATHE FIRE. ONCE THAT IS FINISHED AND THE RESULTS ARE SATISFACTORY, I SHALL RETURN WITH YOUR SECOND ASSIGNMENT. Now, I shall take my leave."

The ghost vanished. Kingler stood there in bemusement. "Make the tamed wheel breathe fire? What kind of megaproject is that? I'll have to figure this out in the morning," said the noble, as he returned to his bed.

[Sizik]

Ok, why/how is there a stack of burning !!cow meat!! in the jail food stockpile?

[Sizik]

A few days later...

A courier rushed to the King's bedroom (which was also his office, dining room, and burial chamber). "Your Highness, one of the armor smiths, Kishmond, has gone into a strange mood!"
"Thanks for the notification, alert me when he has finished his artifact."
"As you wish, Your Highness!" said the dwarf, as he ran off.

Some time later, the young dwarf returned, holding an adamantine shield. "Your Highness, Kishmond has completed his artifact, an adamantine shield. He names it Baladgim, 'Coiltwists'."

King Kingler stared at the shield. "Kind of ugly artwork, don't you think?" the king asked.

"They are elves, Your Highness."

"What? Let me take a closer look at that." Kingler grabbed the shield, and examined it closely. There was no mistaking it, the figure was a demon, with a gnarled face and its arms in the air, striking a menacing pose. There was no way that this could be mistaken for an elf, unless it's meant to be metaphorical or something. "Elves you say?"

"That's what he said, Your Highness, dwarves and elves. It's supposed to represent a lumber agreement we made quite some time ago," replied the dwarf.

"You don't say...," muttered the King, as he peered closer at the grisly figure. Suddenly, the face began to move.

"TWENTY-FIVE DAYS!" shouted the demon, as the king recoiled back from the visage, and threw it to the ground.

"Is something the matter, Your Highness?" inquired the dwarf.

"Di-did you hear that?" exclaimed the king to the dwarf.

"Hear what, Your Highness?" inquired the dwarf, looking ponderously at the shield.

"That voice, I...," said the king, as he looked back to the shield. The demon was gone, and in its place was a depiction of dwarves and elves talking. "J-just take this thing out of my sight."

"As you wish, Your Highness," replied the dwarf, who picked up the artifact and hustled out of the room.

"That nightmare is getting to me," said the king to himself, "I should seek professional counsel."

[PTTG??]

Three cheers to the Renaissance of the Eternal Halls!

[Sizik]

"What... can I help you... with?" asked Endok Mebèrith, the Royal Philosopher and self-proclaimed "Astronomer".
"Umm, well, I've been having some odd dreams and visions lately," replied the King.
"Get those all the time, man," said the astronomer, as he took another hit from his rope reed cigar. The Observatory provided a nice place to have a smoke, as it was high up off the ground, and provided an excellent view of the surround landscape. "What kinda visions are they?"

"Well, a few nights ago, I had a dream, or what I hope was a dream, in which I was visited by a ghost. It looked like he was a stonecrafter or something. Anyway, he said I had to order the construction of one megaproject for each season, but only gave me details about the first one."

"Well, what'd he tell you to do, man?"

"I don't quite remember. It was something about fire-breathing wheels, or tame wheels, or something."

"Dude, you should try the Collosus, he'll know what to do."

"What? What colossus? Is one attacking?" asked the king, not wanting to have to deal with a giant bronze man at the moment.

"Take a look outside, bro," replied the Astronomer.

Kingler rushed to the north window, looking desperately for signs of an attack. Fortunately, no metallic monstrosities manifested. "I don't quite see what you're talking about...," puzzled the king."

"Not down, look straight across." said the stoned dwarf.

"I still don't see any..." The king stopped. His eyes fell upon Kolôsust Zilirlamduthnur Rakust, the great obsidian statue standing guard over the tomb of Aqizzar, one of the Halls' founders and great military heroes. "Colossus... Kolôsust. Wait, Kolôsust means 'Wheeltamed'!" exclaimed the king. "Make the statue breath fire? The only way I know how do to that is... MAGMA!"

With that word, the King rushed down the stairs, scrambling to find his top architects, masons, miners, and engineers.

[Sizik]

"The easiest way, Sire, is to use the magma conduit that was constructed to build the statue in the first place." The chief engineer, PTTG, gestured at the blueprints of the fortress. "Most of the iron pumps were deconstructed, but it will be a piece of *cat tallow biscuit* to put them back in place. As for getting the magma through the statue, I propose an aqueduct be built within the tomb, right under the ceiling, carrying the magma to a pump stack within the statue itself."

The king pondered this idea, then looked at the engineer. "I'm sure Aqizzar wouldn't mind a little warmth," said the king with a smile.


After many days of digging constructing, engineering, power routing, masonry, and pump stacking, the project was complete. Kingler stood watch on the platform overlooking the northern road, the only good vantage point besides standing directly in front of the Colossus itself. He signaled to the dwarf on the battlements, who them promptly ran off to pull the lever. Within minutes, the mouth of the statue started glowing, then dribbling red liquid down its obsidian beard. "YES! YES!" exclaimed the king, jumping up and down before promptly vomiting due to the sunlight. "Ugh... yes."

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Movie

Just then, the king noticed something to the southwest. "Is that... Why yes, it's the humans! Let's see how they appreciate dwarven engineering." But just as the king turned to go back underground, something caught his eye. Goblins, on the mountainside! The king stared in disbelief, then sighed. "Goblins. Why'd it have to be goblins?"

[Sizik]

Remember kids: Conserve magma, always turn your statue off when you're not using it.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)