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Author Topic: Zombie preparedness  (Read 135463 times)

socially_inept_butterfly

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Re: Zombie preparedness
« Reply #330 on: December 16, 2008, 08:43:49 pm »

Oh damn now I'm double screwed I have no defence against that.
Tin foil hats, go!
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WorkerDrone

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Re: Zombie preparedness
« Reply #331 on: December 16, 2008, 08:56:48 pm »

Erm. I don't own any tinfoil...
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Puck

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Re: Zombie preparedness
« Reply #332 on: December 16, 2008, 09:32:37 pm »

"In my zombie plan, I'm going to alaska..."

Mulch Diggums

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Re: Zombie preparedness
« Reply #333 on: December 16, 2008, 11:12:01 pm »

Best plan ever.
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WorkerDrone

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Re: Zombie preparedness
« Reply #334 on: December 17, 2008, 01:08:45 am »

Hear that Putin? He's looking right at you. From his backyard.
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wehtamjd92

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Re: Zombie preparedness
« Reply #335 on: December 17, 2008, 08:04:03 am »

BUT HOW WELL CAN YOU SURVIVE UP THERE!?
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It takes someone special to put the laughter back in slaughter.

What did you all go and order a dead guy for?

Jreengus

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Re: Zombie preparedness
« Reply #336 on: December 17, 2008, 12:00:28 pm »

Just discovered a vital piece of Apocalypse survival appartus. Life straw
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wehtamjd92

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Re: Zombie preparedness
« Reply #337 on: December 17, 2008, 06:25:24 pm »

Brilliant a couple of those and you have a huge lead on the other guy.
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inaluct

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Re: Zombie preparedness
« Reply #338 on: December 18, 2008, 12:30:37 am »

Okay, I have a little time to explain some of the things I dislike about The Zombie Survival Guide. I'll just be listing them in bullet points. Maybe I'll write an actual essay later. Most of my criticism will be based on his weapon selection. I'll revise this and add more coherent criticisms later.

  • The book does not mention golf clubs as a weapon, as far as I know. It should mention them; they'd be an excellent choice if you wanted to crush somebody's brain.
  • Pickaxes are not mentioned either. Brooks talks about how a trench knife could be used to pierce a zombie's skull and destroy their brain. A pickaxe would do it even better.
  • The author has a list of weapons that a home should have to prepare for a zombie invasion. The list includes a katana and a wakizashi. I just hope that that list is meant to be an outright ridiculous part of the book. These recommendations come after him explaining that machetes are probably your best bet when it comes to swordy things. Seriously, machetes are easier to get than wakizashis.
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Qmarx

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Re: Zombie preparedness
« Reply #339 on: December 18, 2008, 02:32:56 am »

  • The author has a list of weapons that a home should have to prepare for a zombie invasion. The list includes a katana and a wakizashi. I just hope that that list is meant to be an outright ridiculous part of the book. These recommendations come after him explaining that machetes are probably your best bet when it comes to swordy things. Seriously, machetes are easier to get than wakizashis.
I think the point is to require more items than necessary - then, when someone inevitably skimps on preparations, they'll still have sufficient equipment.
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umiman

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Re: Zombie preparedness
« Reply #340 on: December 18, 2008, 02:59:18 am »

I think the point is that you're taking a book written for the purposes of humour too seriously. It's like seriously believing that the College Humour Guide to College is gospel truth.

WorkerDrone

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Re: Zombie preparedness
« Reply #341 on: December 18, 2008, 04:15:34 am »

Right. The books merely a satire about zombies, with the purpose to make you have a chuckle or two, and perhaps bounce the whole 'what and where would I bring, do, and go' question. Its a fun book, and WWZ isn't exactly realistic either. But seems to put in perspective the things that people overlook. Damn it people, quit talking about tanks and how it would be impossible to beat it. You mention that if there were enough zeds to pile down the thing, it would be toast. Well guess what? What do pretty much all zombies have in common? Numbers.

And bombs? Thats been covered to. Nukes don't exactly seem like a good idea either, if only because your toast in the long run whether you use 'em or not. So just put it this way.

Your never going to find an accurate interpretation of what would happen if zombies came about, because it isn't going to happen. Just have fun talking about the rotters. Your not going to find out whether a tank would own zombies. Unless the world submitted to corporations and we bought whatever they put out there. Thats as close to zombies your going to get, and people are doing that now already...crap, there among us then!
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inaluct

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Re: Zombie preparedness
« Reply #342 on: December 18, 2008, 07:44:06 pm »

I would dissect the humor of the book, but it's easy to talk about it from a semi-serious point of view, and I feel like talking about zombies. So there.

Anyway, couldn't you just like... Run over all the zombies with a tank? I mean, it's not like tanks can't run people over anyway.
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wehtamjd92

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Re: Zombie preparedness
« Reply #343 on: December 18, 2008, 08:27:32 pm »

But inaluct swords arn't that hard to obtain heck I have one as well as a menagery of other dangerous goods. The golfclub thing you would think it would work, well it does a couple of times, but that thin hollow cilindrical shaft would soon bend under the pressure of busting heads and then your sunk. But personaly while I have skill weilding a sword I would really perfer something like a glave or quarter staff or even my hatchet-throwing axe combo.
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It takes someone special to put the laughter back in slaughter.

What did you all go and order a dead guy for?

inaluct

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Re: Zombie preparedness
« Reply #344 on: December 18, 2008, 09:20:20 pm »

Think about it, wehtam; do you think you could decapitate a zombie with a sword? If so, could you do it again and again reliably?

Your mention of glaives brings up another thing; maces > all. They're one of the only weapons designed to cave heads in, and the Zombie Survival Guide almost totally blows them off. Imagine a long rod with a short chain on the end, and a spiked iron ball on the end of that chain. That would easily be better than almost anything else.
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