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Author Topic: I've recruited a child  (Read 9925 times)

RavingManiac

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Re: I've recruited a child
« Reply #15 on: August 12, 2008, 07:08:05 am »
Darth Vader hacks at You in right hand with his red lightsaber!
You lose hold of the blue lightsaber.
It flies off in a bloody arc!

Darth Vader stands before you
Darth Vader, Sith Lord: Obi Wan never told you what happened to your father.
Luke Skywalker, Jedi: He told me enough, he told me you killed him!
Darth Vader, Sith Lord: No, I am your father!
Luke Skywalker, Jedi: Nooo!

You have fallen into a deep chasm
Logged
Quote from: Zerox on July 20, 2008, 04:14:50 pm
Thief:"Quiet kitty, Qui-"
Cat:"THIEF! Protect the hoard from the skulking filth!"
Quote from: BloodBeard on July 11, 2009, 02:51:17 pm
The resulting party killed 20 dwarves, crippled 2 more and the remaining 9 managed to get along and have a nice party.

Neoskel

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Re: I've recruited a child
« Reply #16 on: August 13, 2008, 03:11:14 am »
Quote from: Aqizzar on August 11, 2008, 03:42:35 am
Quote from: Neoskel on August 11, 2008, 03:36:18 am
General Grievous cancels breathe: pwned by Mace Windu

General Grievous has left a martial trance.
General Grievous cancels hardcore villainy: Tartakovsky lost or destroyed.

 :D

Anakin Skywalker cancels plot consistency: Child sidekick.  :-\

(RavingManiac's was really good too)
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Urist Mcsurvivalist has been accosted by edible vermin lately.

Goblins: The fourth iron ore.

Jetman123

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Re: I've recruited a child
« Reply #17 on: August 14, 2008, 05:33:12 pm »
The flying chert rock strikes the Stormtrooper in the head!
It is broken!
The Stormtrooper falls over.
The Ewok stabs the Stormtrooper in the body with his Alder spear!
It is pierced through entirely!
The Stormtrooper has been struck down.
Logged
When dwarves want to commit suicide, then by Armok, they _will_ commit suicide, even if they have to spend the rest of their lives working at it!

Aqizzar

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Re: I've recruited a child
« Reply #18 on: August 15, 2008, 05:09:46 am »
Quote from: Jetman123 on August 14, 2008, 05:33:12 pm
The flying chert rock strikes the Stormtrooper in the head!
It is broken!
The Stormtrooper falls over.
The Ewok stabs the Stormtrooper in the body with his Alder spear!
It is pierced through entirely!
The Stormtrooper has been struck down.

The sad part is, that's exactly what happens.
Logged
Quote from: Duke 2.0 on October 04, 2011, 05:15:14 pm
And here is where my beef pops up like a looming awkward boner.
Quote from: Toady One on December 04, 2010, 05:10:27 pm
Please amplify your relaxed states.
Quote from: PTTG??
The ancients built these quote pyramids to forever store vast quantities of rage.

Red Jackard

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Re: I've recruited a child
« Reply #19 on: August 15, 2008, 05:56:29 am »
Quote from: pickupsticks on July 17, 2008, 02:17:30 pm
Can you take prisoners "home" ?

I tried this and found what I am sure is her parent but I get no response. :|
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My dwarves are not your dwarves.

Haven

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Re: I've recruited a child
« Reply #20 on: August 16, 2008, 02:32:00 am »
Samuel L. Jackson has been unhappy recently. He was accosted by M$#@F$#@ Snakes recently.
--------

We have the following requests

Water           --o-
Earth            --o-
Submission    ---o


Blasphemy      {T}
Madness        {T}
SPARTA         {T}

o - Offer to Persians

----------------

Urist Dodokurist has been Ecstatic recently. He has dined in hell recently.
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Jetman123

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Re: I've recruited a child
« Reply #21 on: August 16, 2008, 06:03:40 am »
Goblin: DWARVES! LAY DOWN YOUR WEAPONS!

...

*crossbow bolt embeds itself in Goblin's brain*

Urist: GOBLINS!

*dwarves draw their weapons and form a wall of shields*

Urist: COME AND GET THEM!
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When dwarves want to commit suicide, then by Armok, they _will_ commit suicide, even if they have to spend the rest of their lives working at it!

Jackrabbit

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Re: I've recruited a child
« Reply #22 on: August 17, 2008, 06:28:35 pm »
urist cancels dramatic speech: yelling his head off

I recruited a child once, seriously wounded by a jaguar and dying so i decided to end the pain.

You hack at the child's left arm
it flies off in a bloody arc!
You hack at the child's right arm
it flies off in a bloody arc!
you hack at the child's left leg
it flies off in a bloody arc!
you hack at the child's right leg
it flies off in a bloody arc!
you hack at the child's upper body
It is mangled!

and so on. ugh. luckily the kid was unconscious. i eventually decapitated him
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Cthulhu

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Re: I've recruited a child
« Reply #23 on: August 17, 2008, 07:17:47 pm »
The ambulance hits Benigna, Social Worker in the head!
It is mangled!

The flying bullet hits the German tank in the body!
It glances away.
The flying bullet hits the German tank in the body!
It glances away.
The flying bullet hits the German tank in the body!
It glances away.
The flying bomb hits the German tank in the head!
It is incinerated!
German Tank has been struck down.
Tom Hanks, Soldier, has bled to death.

Leonidas, Spartan King has entered a martial trance!
The Spartan King slashes the Persian in the leg with his +Falcatta+!
It flies off in a bloody arc!


This is fun.
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Shoes...

tp12

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Re: I've recruited a child
« Reply #24 on: August 18, 2008, 05:24:29 am »
The flying red laser flies at you!
you do a barrel roll!
it glances of!
Slippy cancels be anoyying: pwnt by single weak enemy.
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Untill recently, before stocks ran out, it rained cats and dogs in my fortress...

Jetman123

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Re: I've recruited a child
« Reply #25 on: August 18, 2008, 07:52:26 am »
The spinning +lead bullet+ strikes the American soldier in the head!
The shot glances away.
The American soldier has been stunned!
The American soldier removes his -steel helmet-.
The spinning +lead bullet+ strikes the American soldier in the head!
It is pierced through entirely!
The American soldier has been shot and killed.

Kudos to anyone who can recognise that scene and name the movie it's from. :)
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When dwarves want to commit suicide, then by Armok, they _will_ commit suicide, even if they have to spend the rest of their lives working at it!

Reasonableman

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Re: I've recruited a child
« Reply #26 on: August 18, 2008, 09:06:35 am »
Saving Pvt. Ryan, if I recall correctly. If not, it might be Band of Brothers.



I have nothing more to add to this conversation.
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A sane man must be reasonable, but a reasonable man need not be sane.

Jetman123

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Re: I've recruited a child
« Reply #27 on: August 18, 2008, 09:36:12 am »
You, sir, get a cookie and some Dwarven ale.
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When dwarves want to commit suicide, then by Armok, they _will_ commit suicide, even if they have to spend the rest of their lives working at it!

Haven

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Re: I've recruited a child
« Reply #28 on: August 19, 2008, 01:27:29 am »
Doncha mean +Dwarven Sugar Biscut+?

The Jedi strikes Anakin in the left upper arm with his lightsaber!
It flied off in a bloody arc!
The Jedi strikes Anakin in the right upper arm with his lightsaber!
It flied off in a bloody arc!
The Jedi strikes Anakin in the right upper leg with his lightsaber!
It flied off in a bloody arc!
The Jedi strikes Anakin in the left upper leg with his lightsaber!
It flied off in a bloody arc!

Anakin cancels Rest: Dangerous terrain.
Anakin is throwing a tantrum!
Anakin gives in to pain.


Palpitine has been content lately. He rescued someone to further his own insane agenda lately.
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Red Jackard

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Re: I've recruited a child
« Reply #29 on: August 19, 2008, 03:00:32 am »
Anyone manage to return a prisoner to their home yet?
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My dwarves are not your dwarves.
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