For some odd reason, while I was building a floor hanging off the side of the mountain two dwarves decided to get married and hold their wedding in the meeting area right under construction. Some people where still working on the above floor. And, due to a miscalculation on my part, there was a a cavein on the wedding. The wife died. The husband suffered red damage to his arms, yellow to one of his legs, red on the other leg, and I think there was brain damage too.
I've heard of throwing rice at the couple but that's just ridiculous.
In DF, that custom could be lethal! Hire a firing squad while you are at it.
My apologies for dragging this up from the first page (and doubly so if someone posted this joke before and I missed it), but:
The spinning Rice grain strikes Urist Lokumdastot in the head!
It is broken!
Urist Lokumdastot's left eye has been knocked out!
Urist Lokumdastot's throat has been blackened!
The spinning rice grain strikes Urist Lokumdastot in the throat!
Urist Lokumdastot's throat has been poked out!
The spinning rice bowl strikes Bomrek Lokumdastot in the body!
Bomrek Lokumdastot's heart has been pierced!
Bomrek Lokumdastot's left lung has been pierced!
Bomrek Lokumdastot's right lung has been pierced!
Bomrek Lokumdastot's liver has been pierced!
Bomrek Lokumdastot has bled to death.
Urist Lokumdastot has suffocated.
As for the most pathetic thing I've seen, I beleive it was in another topic chronicling the building of a very large tower by dwarves. It wasn't mine, but he mentioned that one guy went nuts and tried to kill himself by throwing himself down a drop of eight feet on a stairwell. He'd get up without a scratch, climb up the stairs, and throw himself off again, over, and over, and over, and over. The sheer mental image of it was both funny and depressing.
When dwarves want to commit suicide, then by Armok, they _will_ commit suicide, even if they have to spend the rest of their lives working at it!
Edit: Whoops, it seems I was long beaten, as I figured. Still, I think both our posts are funny.