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[penguinofhonor]

Logbook, 1st of Opal, 1052:
The year is drawing to a close. Not much has happened, although I fear the success of our fortress will draw the attraction of some who would be rather... we'll say "green" about it. Pun fully intended.

Dr. Bombay had said that he wanted to hunt lions, but he couldn't. Yet the other day I told him he could hunt a rouge cougar with the rest of his squad, and his eyes lit up. All the military are still wrestlers, but I'm going for a very strict approach where one must be very skilled at unarmed combat before earning a weapon. It will pay off in the end, as it teaches dodging and all sorts of other things that will be useful.

We've decided to place a tower at the southeast of our above-ground complex in case we get some marksdwarves that could use it.

-Paul McCartney

[OOC: Will refuse under floor grates produce miasma? Because floor grates do create "indoor" tiles beneath them.]

[penguinofhonor]

Logbook, 16th of Opal, 1052:
Dr. Bombay's wife had a baby boy today. She and Bombay are overjoyed by the infant, which is the second baby born in this fortress.

[penguinofhonor]

BEGIN MEDIOCRE PLOTLINE!

The Events of 26th of Opal, 1052:
General Valter and Dr. Bombay were sparring on the second level of the fortress when the familiar cry of "Macaques!" rang out.

Paul leapt into action, yelling "All squads activated! Prepare yerselves! Don't let even one of th' buggers get away!" The troops stormed downstairs, just as the annoying monkeys were rushing through the doors. The soldiers were beating the rhesus monkeys to pulps, when someone noticed something.

"Is that an elf?" a wrestler asked. Indeed, a naked and savage elf was among the little chimps, making a mad dash for the food stockpile one level down.

"Elf! What are ye doing?" Dr. Bombay asked. The elf bit his arm. "Ouch!" He punched the elf in the face and it fell over. The wrestlers had the advantage of numbers, so even an elf couldn't help the monkeys.

"This guy takes 'At peace with nature' to a new level," General Valter joked, not knowing that the elf had already been killed as it had run upstairs, suprising a couple wrestlers who were slow to get to the battlefield.

Suddenly another elf rushed in the door with a monkey on either side of him. The dwarves killed all three of the assailants. Another elf ran in with a monkey and saw that they were outnumbered, immediately chattering to the rhesus macaque in elf-tongue and turning around.

"What should we do?" Bombay said.

Paul, who was below and did not know that there were elves shouted, "Don't let them get away!" Bombay and Valter thought that Paul knew, and ran after the elf and the monkey, their squads following.

[ March 05, 2008: Message edited by: penguinofhonor ]

[penguinofhonor]

The Events of the 1st of Obsidian, 1052:

Bombay and Valter returned to the fortress.

"'At last elf was fast. And pretty strong, too." The wrestlers began to retreat back to the safety of the barracks.

"Why did th' haulers bring back four elf corpses?" Paul shouted.

"There was a fourth one out there, supervising the other elves or something," Bombay said. "We got to hunt macaques too. Real fun."

"What elves?" Paul said. He knew the consequences of angering the elves all too well.

"The savage ones. Wait, ye didn't know?" Bombay and Valter exchanged nervous glances. Someone was about to get an inch off their beard for this.

"Savage elves?" Paul sighed in relief. They might not be troubled too much.

A tall, thin shadow passed over them silently. Then there was a voice, not spoken, but still audible to everyone in the fortress.

You have incurred the wrath of the elves, it said.

"They attacked us!" Paul said to nothing in particular.

That doesn't matter. We're better than you. So, burn.

Those elven bastards, Paul thought.

I can heeeeaaaar you, the voice said.

"Bring it on, tree 'uggers. Your unfair 'justice' doesn't scare a single one of us."

Oh, it's on.

"It better be," Paul remarked.

You sure you don't want to, you know, grovel for forgiveness or anything?

Paul had been walking towards the stairs, but stopped in his tracks. "Ye think we'd do something so elven?"

It was on.

[penguinofhonor]

Logbook, 20th of Obsidian, 1052:
A bone carver has gone fey and is demanding bones, which is really too bad because we just used up the last of the macaque bones.

Logbook, 1st of Granite, 1053:
A new year, and Door has made a new map of the fortress.

[penguinofhonor]

Logbook, 9th of Granite, 1053:

The bone carver came up to me and showed me an amazing bone crown, menacing with bone spikes and with a picture of a dwarf in bone. Worth about 3600 monies.

"Where'd you get th' bones?" I asked.

"Why, the bones o' th' elves we killed, sir."

This will mean trouble. I don't know quite how, but it will and I know it. The elves, in their annoying sense of self-righteousness, will come to kill us for some stupid thing.

[penguinofhonor]

Logbook, the 12th of Granite, 1053:
Ugh, the military is still under-trained. Want proof? We were slaughtered by a goblin ambush just recently. They lost one spearman, we lost four wrestlers and Dr. Bombay's baby.

Dr Bombay's wife was not among the casualties, I believe she was one of the many that just fled as soon as enough wrestlers came out to kill things, making sure that we kept the disadvantage the entire time.

Now we even get to make more coffins.

Logbook, 15th of Granite, 1053:
The elves came to trade, most likely to laugh in our faces about the slaughter and to taunt us about not offending them, and ramble about how we wouldn't be alive if it wasn't for their trade.

Logbook, 26th of Granite, 1053:
I and Dwarmin have been married. We have decided to forgo formal celebrations.

[Dwarmin]

Dwarmin’s notebook
Page 149

It seems my long laid plans have finally borne plump helmets. It only took a couple of months, and our leader actual agreed to marry me! We decided not to have anything major. Don’t get me wrong-she’s a fine gal. But I don’t think she truly grasps why I wooed her in the first place.

With this act of union, I am not only guaranteed a position of power in our burgeoning fort, but I can finally change things for the better-my miners (though I am the only one as of this time) wont be mistreated again! I trust her, I surely do. But power can corrupt even the purest souls. I will be her conscience-always watching, always waiting. I have devoted myself to her, but the fort and the Dwarves who live here mean more. I would kill her if I had to. I really am that serious.

The Goblins finally found us. I suspected the Elves ratted us out, but none of friends bought it. They sent a small raiding party, easily driven off, but it was enough to give us a bloody nose. We lost some soldiers-and an Bombay's innocent child was killed. It was a sad day, considering that he had fled his previous home to escape these foul beasts. But-Armok pisses the back of your neck everyday, but he only drowns you once, so they say.

Of course, I must burn this journal after this entry-if she found it the best I could hope for is banishment. It is sad to relinquish an old friend-but I filled up all the pages anyway. Time to move on. My last thought-who was I writing this for? HA

[Kaelem Gaen]

Mr. K's Journal and Recipes, Entry 2

A new year and the elves have returned, I may hate them like any good dwarf, but I may have to wait another year before I can put in a request for Sun Berries. I believe it was the elves who tended to have them.   I've heard tales that this drink called "Sunshine" is the best alcohol to make and comes from these sun berries, how great booze can come from primarily elves is beyond me.  

Dwarmin and Paul (Such a strange name for a woman, sounds human must find out) have been married but decided not to hold a reception,  So my special wedding brew shall sit around a few more years.  I also seem to be rapid fire friend making, but I AM The primary brewer,  I believe my friend Asmel looks up to me but who knows.   Now I must got and offer to share a drink with Paul and Dwarmin of the strongest booze I've got.
-- Mr. K

[ March 06, 2008: Message edited by: Kaelem Gaen ]

[penguinofhonor]

Damn elves haven't brought a single sun berry or sun berry seed. I'll have to offer their druids some rock mugs or something useless like that.

Logbook, 28th of Granite, 1053:
It seems I forgot to note that we bought a cougar and a fox from the elves. They chuckled when I asked for the cougar, but would not tell me anything more than "There are far worse things than cougars, short one."

Those damn elves.

It is decided that we shall trap the entrances to the fortress, because we seriously need some extra defense. One good thing did come from the goblin ambush: we got a nice amount of iron.

[penguinofhonor]

Logbook, 10th of Felsite:
Married couples use the same room, and therefore their rooms should be twice as big in order to fit the extra dwarf, and that's exactly what we're going to do.

[OOC: this serves as a test to see if married dwarves will use additional beds if there are more than one in their room. I wish children lived with their parents, because then they could use the extra beds.]

I and Dwarmy (I call him that) are going to get one as well. It's pretty neat. Also, the elves left before we were able to give them any socks. Too bad for them.

[penguinofhonor]

Logbook, 26th of Felsite:
We are currently reflooring both above-ground stockpiles: the refuse stockpile and the graveyard stockpile.

We also got many immigrants recently. Our army is growing larger, it seems.

Dagur had a baby recently, though. A little boy. She and General Valter now have a son and a daughter. I'm good friends with Dagur so I see her a lot. I don't know her husband that well, though.

We're building weapon traps to guard the entrance of the fortress and help our military out.

[penguinofhonor]

This is amazing. The human caravan comes and I see the white U of the human diplomat come onto the edge of the map, then a whole swarm of white U's come after him. I'm like, "Whoa, he brought the whole Merchants' Guild!"

And then I look and they're all unicorns.

[penguinofhonor]

17th of Malachite, 1053:
We traded with the humans, nothing of much importance happened there.

I was elected mayor, so I and Dwarmy have moved into the mayor's rooms. They're rather nice.

Also, a woodworker has taken over the carpenter's workshop. He got three logs, a turtle shell, some cow leather, and some billon bars that I was thinking would make some nice goblets. Now that plan is ruined, so he better make something neat.

Logbook, 22nd of Malachite, 1053:
The carpenter made an alder statue, 'Councilvelvet the Execution of Assembling,' which, with its decorations of turtle shell and alder and various pictures in all the other decorations, is worth 17400 monies. Excellent. It shall be placed in my dining room, of course. Others will get turns at amazing things such as this, but they will have to wait.

Of course, I'm suffering here because I have to look at a picture of a carp attacking a dwarf, but it's just such a beautiful picture of a carp attacking a dwarf that I forgive the guy.

Logbook, 11th of Galena, 1053:
I finished speaking with the human diplomat today. They said they would pay much for some spears, war hammers, scepters, anvils, rock crowns, rings, toys, and cheese.

[penguinofhonor]

Logbook, 17th of Limestone, 1053:
Our military is next to useless. A marksgoblin squad comes and ambushes us, killing a cat. The military rushes out to kill the two goblins that didn't get mauled by traps and what happens? They get shot at once, this shot misses, and they run the hell away.

Then the marksgoblin, unoccupied because it's not being attacked, shoots and kills a couple dwarves in the backs. One dies. Then there's the next marksgoblin squad that arrives with about 10,000 goblin snatchers, so while half the soldiers are busy running away from the marksgoblins, the other half are running away from goblin snatchers.

So then, during all this, the humans have arrived and their marksman makes more kills than all of our military, while constantly being shot at by several marksgoblins. Eventually he collapses and the goblins go to chase some unicorns.

General Valter is the only one with a spine, which isn't saying much because he only killed some goblins once they were distracted taking potshots at the unicorns. Then, instead of returning to help defend the base from more ambushes that will probably happen in the next couple days, he's out unicorn hunting.

Logbook, 1st of Sandstone, 1053:
We finished killing everything, I traded with the dwarves, we're dumping all the useless clothes into the chasm and melting the metal ones. There aren't many metlal ones, since there was one non-marksgoblin and marksgoblins wear leather.

In general, bad day. We counted the dead and we lost seven soldiers. Not good. It seems that unarmed dwarves, no matter how skilled at unarmed combat, will not fight their opponents. This will be remedied the way everything else should be remedied: with weapons.