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[A_Fey_Dwarf]

Ill give GeneralValter a PM to tell him its his turn.

[GeneralValter]

And so I take up the mantle!

The mantle of leadership, that is! Now is the time to lead Glovebreakfast into a new age of prosperity!

[GeneralValter]

First day

The wary dwarves watched as their new leader walked across the two bridges leading into Glovebreakfast.

"The defenses here are very nice. The ballista is an especially nice touch."

"Uhh, thank you, Valter."

"So, since security is taken care of, let's work on infrastructure! Hmmmm...."

"Well, we've already got a monument..."

"Wait! I've got a better idea than that! The monument is nice, but its beauty clashes with the ugliness of the surrounding landscape. I want every single dwarf that's not busy to start paving every single rock out here!"


It was settled, then. We had another one of "those" leaders.

[GeneralValter]

Notes of Valter, first day

Why would any fortress need more than five woodworkers? This is insane! We also have about ten smiths, and 4 magma forges. For now, every single extra dwarf (which in this case amounts to about 30!) will be making our front lawn more aesthetically pleasing. I'm really surprised that this fort can still feed itself with half of its population just lying around doing nothing.

[Dwarf Fanatic]

I'm a fan of BOATMURDURED! Lemme get in and watch me be evil.

I'll wait for 20 years of evilness if I have too!

[GeneralValter]

"Sound the alarm, sound the alarm!"

"What?! What is it, goblins?"

"Worse! Elves!"

The mayor gathered everybody immediately.

"Remember, just because you can bring it to the depot right in front of their eyes doesn't mean you can then trade it to them. And the logs they bring in were sung willingly from the trees, so that won't fly either."

"What can we bring, then?"

"Basically anything under your standard hippy bastard vegan panzy diet. So, only rocks or silk that was stolen unwillingly from poor spiders just trying to make a living for themselves."

---------------------------------------
The hippies brought about 4 metric fuck-tons of cloth, which I happily took off their hands for about 6 giant spider silk socks. I threw in a few crude obsidian trinkets as a gift, too. I'm hoping to net five metric fuck-tons of cloth next year!

So, two sketches on local progress:

What you see here is the setup for a more efficient military evacuation policy! Or maybe just a few extra doors to keep my wrestlers from bottlenecking all over that measly single exit.


I was rather amused by the setup of the ballista bolt stockpile. It's arranged so that the siege operators must walk directly into the line of sight of whatever they're firing at to reach their arrows. Way to go, previous overseers.

Also, my new fisher managed to discover both a goblin snatcher AND a kobold thief in the same day. Looks like he's catching more than just fish!

[GeneralValter]

About a day after the last post:

Mistakes are made.


The image above shows the results of a pikegoblin ambush. four are caught in cages, two are smashed by weapon traps, and one makes it through and kills two dwarves (including a legendary engraver). Shortly after, a goblin master thief makes it halfway across my bridge before being discovered by two dwarves. Another dwarf gets pulverized, but the other knocks the thief unconscious and proceeds to break every single bone in the goblin's body.

About 4 frames later, the other half of the pikegoblin squad shows up to mop up. Since my dwarves are hauling goblin bits that were blown up by the weapon traps, about 90% of my population is currently outside. I finally decide to give the order to haul ass inside.

Two goblins immediately make a break for the weapon traps, and succeed admirably in getting themselves impaled all over them. A woodworker caught outside gets chopped to pieces, but the pikegoblins shortly run away, having sustained sufficient casualties to actually realize that this whole invasion idea wasn't really working so well after all.

My military spends another couple minutes pulverizing a goblin that got behind, and the dwarves get to work hauling chunky goblin chunks to the refuse stockpile. My fisher, I kid you not, discovers about 4 more goblin snatchers throughout the course of these events.

I like to look on the bright side of these kinds of engagements. I mean, we lost 4 or 5 dwarves, but at least there won't be as much lag now!

And besides, there's a massive amount of satisfaction to be gained from thinking about how the elves entered across a pristine bridge across a fearsome moat, and will be exiting through a pool of bloody goblin chunks and vomit.

I forgot how much I liked this game.

[Mido]

I was rather amused by the setup of the ballista bolt stockpile. It's arranged so that the siege operators must walk directly into the line of sight of whatever they're firing at to reach their arrows. Way to go, previous overseers.

 

I have no idea what you're talking about........really.....*runs*

[GeneralValter]

The filling has begun! I had just been thinking about how the moat needed something in it when I noticed that there was already a nice water flow nearby! a few channels later, water started to seep through. I'm just hoping it'll all reach full capacity within the year.

[GeneralValter]

Soon after the last post, about four gabillion immigrants arrived. Probably not that much, but I haven't been keeping track. Anyway, our fortress now has a healthy 102 dwarves in it. Yikes.

Also, our cheese maker has gone fey and claimed a craftsdwarve's workshop! Oh no! What will we do if he doesn't get the materials he requires?! There will be no one left to make cheese for us! Darn.

[GeneralValter]

Whoopsy. Looks like my ambitious moat project is beginning to effect the environment.



On the light side, our cheese maker finished his work. He made.... dun dun dun! A turtle shell helm! I find the entire idea of a turtle shell helm to be hilarious. I can just imagine a dwarf strapping a turtle to his head and calling it a helmet. Oh, after adorning it with roughly 75,000 monies worth of copper and various gems. You may be wondering why he decided the primary material should be turtle, instead of copper. I am too.

[GeneralValter]

"Sound the alarm! Goblins!"

"What?! I thought the goblins came last season!"

"Look, Valter, I know you're new here, but you gotta learn something. Round these parts, Every season is goblin season."

Long story short, another 3 dwarves died  . My epic fish cleaner Tosid, who has now found about 40 goblin snatchers, managed to escape an ambush of lashers by breaking the lead goblin's leg and then running as far as he could. Despite his broken arm, he led the lashers on a zany run around the area surrounding Glovebreakfast, while my wrestlers systematically swarmed and broke-to-death every single other goblin in the area (which included a speargoblin squad and two macegoblin squads) before realizing that Tosid needed help and running to aid him. By then, though, the lashers had realized that their plans for Glovebreakfast domination would not be coming to success today, and had already left.

Sorry, no pictures this time. Already happened a while ago, but I figured I should fill you in. We lost a legendary gem setter among others. He won't be missed.

[Mido]

I wonder how many of the original dwarves still remain. The captain of the guard didn't die, did he? I mean...he was badass.

[Hadriel]

My epic fish cleaner Tosid, who has now found about 40 goblin snatchers, managed to escape an ambush of lashers by breaking the lead goblin's leg and then running as far as he could.

Now that's what I call a hit and run 

[Mido]

Bump...GeneralValter, are you done?