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[AlmostEverywhere]

Man, this Titan fight is taking up more space than I thought it would.  I'm going to split it into 2 posts.  Here's the first:

As Alath arrived at lookout hill, Udib the miner and Lorbam the dungeon master were already there.  Lorbam pointed towards the foothills in the northeast.  "There she is.  She's a Titan all right."

Alath looked towards the hills, and saw at their base an extremely large woman.  "She's not quite how I pictured her!  Somehow... I didn't think she'd be so... so..."

"Ugly?" Udib finished his sentence for him.  The titan was was rather fat, and her hair seemed to stick out in every impossible direction at once.  She seemed to have trouble keeping her balance, and it was hard to tell at this distance, but she seemed to be picking her nose.

"HEY!  STUPID LITTLE MEN!  I TITAN, I COME!  YOU WORSHIP I!  OR ELSE SQUISHIES!!!"

Alath was flummoxed.  "But... I thought titans were ancient, majestic beings!  According to legend, they helped shape the world!"

"According to legend," Lorbam chimed in, "they also had a habit of marrying their sisters."

The titan began to amble towards them, then stopped, and stuck her finger in her ear.  Then she sat down and started pulling up fistfuls of grass and bushes from around her.

Alath looked down at her with pity.  "I was going to order a charge, but I'm not sure I want to now!  I feel kind of bad for her."

"Surely," Lorbam said with surprise, "you're not planning on just letting her roam free?"

Udib spoke up.  "What about capture?  Fixit's always bragged about how his cages are so ingeniously designed that they can capture ANYTHING.  Maybe we should put that claim to the test?"

"All right.  But let's use the cage traps in the north."  Alath was referring to a ramp down the cliffside into the river valley that they had dug, north of the fortress.  They had lined the ramps with cage traps, hoping to snare some of the local wildlife.  "If something goes wrong now, at least it will be away from the main fort."

Alath began shouting orders.  "Slicer, Dicer, macedwarves, and hammer-dwarves, go out the back door and wait at the base of the trapped ramp!  All the other soldiers guard the front gate!"  Alath grabbed a peasant that was passing by.  "I need you."

"Wha, me, sir?  Aw, well, then, what's it you'll be needin' me for?"

"Bait."

It was several hours later when everything was prepared.  The soldiers stood in the valley, at the base of the ramp, while the Titan was still very near the spot she had come down from the hills, trying to step on rabbits.  The poor peasant, now officially a recruit of the military, stood trembling with the soldiers.

"Don't worry 'bout it, buddy!"  Slicer was doing her best to console him.  "I'd do it, but sometimes I can't control myself when I see somethin' that needs slicin' an' Alath wants this lady alive.  So remember, get to where she can see ya, and RUN.  Got it?"

The peasant nodded.  He walked up the ramp, slowly, dragging his feet.

Meanwhile, Alath and Udib watched from lookout hill.  Lorbam came up to them, looking frustrated.  "The dwarven merchants are leaving!"

"What?"  Alath was genuinely surprised.  In all the excitemnet he had forgotten that there were merchants trading at the Depot. "Don't they know there's a Titan out there?"

"I told them, but they wouldn't listen!  They've packed up their mules and they're heading out!"

"Blast them!  I hope that peasant gets moving quickly!"

The peasant was getting closer to the Titan, but Alath could see the merchants leaving through the front gate.  He gritted his teeth, hoping for the best.  He really didn't want to be stuck with all the goblins' narrow armor after he went to so much trouble to trade it away.

The Titan saw the peasant-recruit.  "HEY!  YOU!  LITTLE MAN!  COME GIVE I WORSHIP!  I WANT PRETTIES!  GIVE PRETTIES OR I GIVE SQUISHIES!"

As she began lumbering towards him, the peasant gave a little squeak.  "Forget this, I quit the military!"  He turned around and started running to the soldiers as fast as he could.

"HEY!  YOU NO RUN!  I CATCH YOU, LITTLE FUNNY-BEARD!"  The peasant pumped his legs as hard as he could.  It hurt to breathe, but he could hear the THOOM-THOOM-THOOM of the Titan's pursuit behind him and he didn't stop.  Finally, he reached the ramp!  He got to the bottom, and nearly fell at Dicer's feet.

"Um, nice run there," said Slicer, "But, ah, where's the Titan?"

"COW!" boomed the Titan's voice.  "COW NOW HOW BOW... YOU CUTE!"  Alath watched in horror as she seemed to lose interest in the peasant, becoming distracted by the cow they had tied up to watch for ambushes!  She was running south to the cow now, closer to the gate, and closer to the departing merchants!

[AlmostEverywhere]

Aban Kironolin, macedwarf, rushed past the the bedroom doors of Authorgilt.  Fine time for trouble to come!  He had been sleeping!  He didn't even know what was going on, just that his squad had been ordered to the base of the northern ramps.  He was probably already late!  Oh, he'd hear it from Slicer this time!  

Alath was still watching as the Titan approached the cow.  It mooed in fear, struggling against the rope that held it, but to no avail.  Finally, she reached it, taking its head in her meaty hand.

"FUN COW!  BOING BOING!"  She started whipping the poor beast around by the head!  Who could tell how long it could take this treatment?  And then she would undoubtedly turn on the merchants.  Already she was eyeing them as they marched past along the road.

And then Alath saw a macedwarf leave the fortress, and head out the front gate.

"Oh my, oh my," muttered Aban to himself, "I'm late!  I gotta get down that ramp as quickly as possible!  WHOAH!  That's the biggest woman I've ever seen!  I gotta save that poor cow!"

Udib sighed and shook his head, as they watched the lone macedwarf charge the Titan.

"Enough."  Alath was sad and resolute.  "This is getting out of hand.  We'll never manage to capture it now, not without loss of life."  He leaned his head back and cried, "All soldiers, charge the Titan!"

From the north came Slicer and Dicer, leading the dwarves who were at the bottom of the ramp.  From the south came Ingish and As, leading the dwarves who stood at the gate.  The Titan didn't even seem to notice them until a bolt stuck in her shoulder.

"HEY!  WHAT GOING ON!  IT POINTY AND I HURT!"  She seemed to be talking to the cow.  "YOU BETRAY I!  BRING PAIN!  I GET YOU FOR THIS!"

As the soldiers fell upon her, she seemed more focused on the poor cow.  She kept grabbing its head and shaking it around, not even laying a hand upon the dwarves as they attacked.

Finally, it was over.  The cow's skull had been fractured, but the Titan was felled, and none of the soldiers had a scratch on them.  Alath sighed.  "A military fiasco.  It wasn't supposed to be that way."

"Hey, you did your best," consoled Udib.

"Yeah, I guess.  To be honest, I'm going to be happier when elections come around, and I can just go back to being plain old Alath of the fortress guard.  I know you wanted the best for me, Udib, but this really just isn't the life for me.  If I can spend time with Usrir and have warm meals, that's really all I need.  I'm proud of what I've done for the most part, but stuff like this Titan mess really weigh on me."

"Well, it's a shame you're leaving politics.  Everyone loves you.  But you gotta listen to your heart.  I'm sure Dodok's happy, anyway."  Udib gave him a wink.

Alath laughed.  "Yep.  I guess she is."

[AlmostEverywhere]

Hm, not many replies these days.  Is anyone still reading this?  I do have a good idea of where I'd like it to go, but if interest drops down maybe I'll skip ahead some to the big events.

[Armok]

I am reading it, continue according to awesome plan.  

[Mephansteras]

I still read as well! I just don't post much to a story I'm reading to cut down on the fluff in between the actual story pages.

[Lemnx]

Keep it up  

[AlmostEverywhere]

Heh, okay, just checking!  Looks like there's still plenty of interest, so I'll keep going.  Here's the next bit:

It was a fine autumn day as the election came and went.  No one was surprised by the outcome; Dodok was running unopposed.  The dwarves gathered in the statue garden as she gave her celebratory victory speech:

"My fellow dwarves, I thank you for putting your trust in me!  It's no wonder our fortress is called 'Authorgilt', since we have so much gold we barely know what to do with it!  But with the skilled hands of Kivish 'the Moneymaker' Zocogusil, our wealth will only increase!  I promise to supply him with all the metal he can use for his work!"

A cheer went up, as Kivish was hoisted off the ground and carried amongst the applauding crowd by some guards.

"As to my friend Alath, who graciously stepped aside, I thank you for your wisdom!  You should be proud of all you've accomplished, and so I give you a title, Alath 'the Proud'!"

More cheers, as Alath turned red.

"And further, to celebrate my victory, we have completed the next floor of our glass tower!  One day it will scrape the skies!"

More cheering.

"Perhaps you celebrate too soon, Dodok!" It was Mosus's voice.  "I don't think your mayorship is set in stone just yet!"

Dodok looked with confusion at Mosus.  She glanced over to Lorbam, who stood staring, expressionless.  She turned back to the sensible dwarf.  "But, I won the election!"

"Well maybe the votes haven't all been counted yet!  In fact, I've got several counters right here who say I won!"  With a loud clanging of armor, practically the entire military of Authorgilt poured into the room.  Some of the peasants started screaming as the soldiers formed up behind Mosus and on his flanks.  There was a panic, as some dwarves tried to escape, and others lept to the floor, their hands covering their heads.  Alath and the fortress guard quickly came to Dodok's aid, forming a protective circle around her and Lorbam.

Mosus snickered.  On his left were Slicer and Dicer.  On his right was Ingish, leader of the axedwarves.  With Ingish stood As, slow and resolute.

"What do you think you're DOING, Mosus?!" Dodok cried.  "You can't hope to rule this fortress via battle!"

"I won't have to," Mosus replied cooly.  "There won't be a battle, as long as you yield your title to me right now."

Slicer pulled out her sword.  The macedwarves and speardwarves on the flanks leaned forward, ready to charge.  The marksdwarves behind him lowered their crossbows.

Alath pleaded, "Please, don't DO this!"  He looked at As.  "As, I know you don't want to do this!"

As looked like he would say something, but Ingish interrupted.  "What's the matter, Alath?  Afraid if we end up fighting, I'll finish what I started with your back?"

Alath felt the chronic pain in his back, and remembered what Ingish had done to him and to Usrir.  He raised his axe.  Suddenly, he was interrupted by the sound of laughter.

It was Lorbam.  "AHaahahahaha, oh my, Mosus!  This is truly gutsy of you!  Even I didn't see it coming!  Very well.  I suppose you might be amicable to a compromise?"

Mosus narrowed his suspicious eyes.  "I'm listening."

"We'll make you leading general.  Since you're so chummy with the military anyway, you can have full command of the armed forces.  Dodok will maintain power in the rest of the fortress."

"And why shouldn't I just take everything now?"

"Do you really want a bloodbath?  Kill us now, and you'll lose half your military.  Not to mention any goodwill or loyalty the other dwarves might have towards you.  You can only rule by fear for so long, Mosus.  I'm offering you a good bargain here.  Be sensible."

Mosus stood and thought.  The tension in the air was thick, as hands gripped swords and axes tight.  Finally, Mosus spoke.  "I accept."

The dwarves were slowly backing away from each other, as a Thresher ran into the room.  "Hey guys, I've been locked away in my workshop for the last week, but check out this oaken ring I made!  I call it 'Glacierblocked', because... hey, what's going on?"

[Frelock]

Great writing.  I'm still reading, and still enjoying.

[AlmostEverywhere]

Okay, gonna be gone for a few days, so here's a couple more parts before I go:

Winter had just settled over Authorgilt, as Lorbam came into Dodok's new office with some large papers.

"What are those?" asked Dodok.

"Plans I've been working up with Udib and Fixit.  I think it's high time we carved out a grand treasury for ourselves.  All the dungeon masters back in the mountainhomes are doing it!  Take a look at these.  We'll have a huge, secure room, hidden deep within the earth, where we'll keep our most valuable treasures!  Right now they're all just sitting there on the first level, ready to be stolen by the first thief who comes in.  But, when completed, this treasury will only be accesible from the lowest level of the central shaft, through a series of tricky and trap-riddled rooms, each more difficult to pass through than the last!"

Dodok looked over the documents.  "My goodness!  That's a lot of protection!  It would take years and years to complete a task of this magnitute!"

"But," Lorbam urged, "years well spent!  Just think, we'll be the envy of every dwarven settlement!  Our fortress will be worthy of the king himself!"

Dodok smiled.  "You've put a lot of work into this.  I guess I can't say no."

On the 10th of moonstone, Lorbam was going over the initial plans with Udib.  Dodok was busy filing work orders for more doors.  Alath was having a nice supper with Usrir.  And a vile force of darkness arrived.

"To arms!  To arms!  All soldiers prepare for battle!" Mosus was screaming from lookout hill.  "A large squad of goblin pikemen come from the north, down the river valley!"

Mosus's heart was racing.  He was born for this!  He'd show Dodok how a REAL dwarf handled war.  Quickly, he deployed his troops at the front gate, and had all other entrances closed.  The goblins would need to use the northern ramps  to get out of the valley, which meant going through the cage traps.  He watched as they marched towards the fortress, noticing that their leader pushied them forward with an iron whip.

But they did not turn towards the ramps.  Instead, they continued south, down through the valley.  What could be going on?  Surely they weren't just passing through!  The back door -was- closed, right?

Worried, Mosus walked all the way to the cliffside.  He lay down, and poked his head over the cliff, looking down into the river valley below.  From his angle, he could just barely see the back gate, carved into the base of the cliff face below him.  A chill winter wind blew up from the valley, and he shivered, but he had to know.  Squinting, he looked carefully, and saw that yes, the bridge was up, there was no entering the fort that way.  In fact, the goblins below him weren't marching towards the back gate.  No, they were heading for somewhere further south along the cliff... Mosus scanned for anything unusual.

Then he saw it, and let out a cry.  "TREASON!  BETRAYAL!  CURSE THE COWARDS!"  He ran back, back, and down into the fort and found Dodok.

"Dodok!"  He was panting, out of breath.  "There's a gap in the south cliff!  Someone has opened up a hole into the rear of our fortress!  The goblins are going to slip by our defenses!"

[AlmostEverywhere]

"WHAT??"  Dodok looked shocked.  She hesistated, but only for a moment.  "GESHUD!" she cried.

Geshud Alathkebon, 'Constructor', one of the original seven founders, was without a doubt the finest mason in Authorgilt, perhaps in the entire world.  Legends were spoke of his skill, even before he had withdrawn from society for a week to create "The Mindful Misery", an exquisite stone throne.  Now he came running quickly at Dodok's call.

"What can I do ya for, boss?" he asked.

"There's an opening in our defenses!  Run to the south tunnels, and find it.  Then, quick as you can, wall it off!  Understand?"

Geshud's face grew deadly serious as he realized the gravity of the situation.  "You can count on me, boss."  He dashed off with amazing speed.

"If anyone can seal the entrance in time, he can."

Mosus anxiously went back up to look-out hill and watched the goblins march down the valley.  They drew closer and closer to their target on the cliff.  Would Geshud seal the entrance in time?  The goblins were close now, within arrow-shot of the entrance!

And suddenly they stopped.  They seemed to be arguing.  The goblin with the whip started shouting at them, then lashing them, as they turned around and began marching north once more, towards the northern ramps.  Mosus let out a deep sigh of relief.

When the goblins finally did reach the ramps, four of them were captured in cages among the traps.  The rest emerged and began marching towards the front gate.  Mosus gave the order for all soldiers to charge.

"They don't call me 'Old S.O.S.' because I have the soliders hide indoors," he chuckled.

Ingish was the first to meet the goblins, with his axe held high and saliva foaming from his screaming mouth.  He had decapitated two of them before the other axedwaves, and Slicer and Dicer, came behind him to form a front line.

"Don't get ahead like that!" said Slicer, deflecting a pike's thrust with her shield.  "You could get surrounded!"

"Ha!  You're just jealous I got the first kill of the fight!" spat back Ingish, separating another goblin from its arms.

A great battle then ensued:

In the end, the goblins were all slain, save those in cages, and not a single dwarf was so much as scratched.  Mosus congratulated the soldiers, giving them double rations for a week, and rotating squads patrolling the site of the battle as the civilians sorted through the dropped gear.

But something troubled Mosus, gnawing at him.  That hole in the southern cliff hadn't just shown up on its own.  Someone had cut it, and though Mosus couldn't be sure from the angle he had... it seemed that it had been dug from the inside.

[ricemastah]

Nice, keep up the good work!

[AlmostEverywhere]

Zolak Tunguzolak, goblin Pikeman, sat nervously in his cage as it bumped along, being hauled deep into the earth.  His squad had been told that this fortress would be easy pickings, that they'd sneak in, slaughter anyone who stood in their way, and plunder all the treasures of the legendary Moneymaker.  Instead, they had made a sudden abrupt change of approach, and Zolak had stepped on the wrong piece of the floor, causing a cage to fall from above and entrap him.  From the sounds of the battle, it seemed he was one of the lucky ones.

Finally, his cage stopped bouncing and jostling.  The dwarf hauling it seemed relieved, and left.  His cage was in a large room, with some open pits in the floor.  He couldn't see what was in them from his angle.  He could see three of his companions, also caged, along the wall, and what looked like a goblin babysnatcher in a fifth cage.

A well-dressed dwarf strode in, with two crossbow-wielding dwarves behind him.  The dwarves with the crossbows stood silently at the entrance, while the other spoke.

"Ah, greetings my guests!  You are in the dungeon of Authorgilt, and I am the dungeon master.  Granted, this dugeon isn't as splendid as those they have back in the mountainhomes, but I pulled a few strings for this and I rather like it.  What do you think?"

Zolak was nervous.  What was going on here?  He and the other goblins remained silent.

"Well, the reason you are my guests today is that I think you know something.  It's something I'd very much like to know myself.  And you're going to tell me.  Otherwise..."

He strode over to the cage with the babysnatcher.  Flinging it open, he roughly dragged the terrified goblin inside over to one of the pits, and flung him in.  The poor goblin screamed as he hit the floor below.  Zolak heard a fierce howling and barking.  There were dogs in that pit.  The poor snatcher was being ripped apart by them!  Zolak winced, until finally the screams stopped.

"So."  The dwarf was nonchalant, as if nothing had happened.  "I'd like to know how it is you knew about that hole in the cliff.  You were marching to it far before you could see it.  Who told you it was there?"

The trembling goblins said nothing.

"No one wants to volunteer anything?  That's a pity.  For you.  For me, it means I get to use more of my new toys."

He purposefully strode to the cage next to Zolak's.  Opening it, he reached inside and grabbed the goblin, who began screaming, kicking, and fighting.  The guards aimed their crossbows, but the dungeon master waved them away.  With a solid SMACK! he landed a blow on the goblin's head.  Dazed, it was dragged over to a second pit, and thrown in.

There was a scream, briefly.  A ball of fire leapt up from the pit, following by a hissing, smoldering sound.  Soon great plumes of smoke were billowing from the pit, blocking any view of it.

"Ah, how glad I am Authorgilt has magma," the dwarf said to himself.  He then walked to Zolak's cage.  "Come here, you."

"N- no!!!"  Zolak was panicked, but for all his struggling, he knew he couldn't escape.  He was dragged to a third pit, and thrown in.  As he landed and the cold stone floor, he struggled to his feet, stunned.  His vision was blurred, but as he regained his balance he realized this pit was empty.  It was small, certainly, barely large enough to fit him, but he seemed to be in no danger.

"Now."  The dwarf was peering over the edge of the pit at Zolak.  Zolak noticed a large lever by the side of the pit, which the dwarf was holding.  "Talk.  Who told you about the unguarded entrance?"

"Uhm..." Zolak was shaking.  "M-my commanding officer!  His name was Oled..."

The dwarf pulled on the lever.  Suddenly a sharp copper spike shot up through the floor, sticking through Zolak's right leg.  He let out a yelp of pain.

"Don't play games with me, goblin!"  He pulled the lever back, and the spike retracted, causing just as much pain.  "Who is the traitorous dwarf that gave you the information?!"

Zolak now realized he was wrong.  The goblins who died in battle were the lucky ones.  He was loosing blood, and was feeling faint, but he mustered his strength, and sent a lob of goblin spittle flying towards the dwarf above.

"I see.  You may live to regret that, though not for long."  The dwarf's fingers tightened on the lever.

Later, Lorbam the dungeon master met with Udib, Dodok, and Mosus.  "I'm afraid the interrogation wasn't successful," he announced, "If the goblins knew who the traitor was, they weren't talking.  On the plus side, we have some extra empty cages again."

[Armok]

Poor little goblin...  

[Frelock]

Oh, for Armok's sake, you're the god of blood.  Show some blood lust, will ya?

For me, on the other hand:

Poor little goblin...  

[AlmostEverywhere]

Oh, sure, slaughter kittens by the thousands, and no one bats an eyelid.  But give a couple dead goblins a backstory and suddenly everyone's sad.  What kind of anti-internet is this??

If it makes you feel any better, Zolak totally would have killed dwarf-babies if he had the chance.

[ June 02, 2008: Message edited by: AlmostEverywhere ]