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[Maggarg - Eater of chicke]

Heavy has ideas?
I'm double-buggered.

[Heavy Flak]

The events of the 11^th of Sandstone, 1067

Merkil stood in the doorway to the makeshift infirmary, slowly shaking his head.  As he surveyed the pair in their beds, he slowly exhaled, and pointed towards Sarek. 

"You.  Tell me what the hell just happened, huh?"
Sarek rolled her eyes, folding her arms across her chest.  "Miss Priss over there got all bent out of shape when we were sparring.  We started grappling, and when we tripped over Stravitch we landed wrong."
"No, she started it," Eita complained. 

"Hell," Merkil cursed.  He took a deep breath to steady himself, and pointed ot Eita.  "What happened."
"She started talking shit about The Old Major, and I gave her a sock on the jaw.  So she hit my bum leg with her spear haft and I heard it crack, and I tackled her and she landed wrong."
"It didn't happen like that!"
"Yes it did, exactly like that!"
"I didn't hit you in the leg, I got you in a headlock and we tripped over Stravitch while he was laying down."

"Why was Stravitch on the floor?" Merkil asked dryly.
"He was drunk," Sarek said.
Merkil thought about this for a second. "Yes, I suppose that does make sense.  Alright, well..." he looked the pair over, their left legs set in casts and suspended by a sling-and-pulley setup.  "You two will have a good amount of time to clear your stories up, and get over this.  I'll send Dojango down to check on you, until then, just be good."

The pair went silent as the door shut.  Chains rattled slightly, and a bed creaked, as Sarek reached over giving Eita a quick shot in the arm.  "That's for breaking my leg."
"Your leg!  Oh, that's it!"

[Eita]

We started grappling,

Wow.... I had to reread that part a few times until I was sure that it said grappling.

[IronValley]

Always fun to read about Dwarf Fortress sparring accidents.....

[Pixelfish]

Making out on top of Stravitch would be like the ultimate teen thrill.

"Wanna go grapple on top of Stravitch tonight?"
"Oh your so -naughty-".



..Course, what would occur when and if he came to would be another story..

Also is Riddlewire drinking water instead of booze? Cause that just made me laugh.

[sonerohi]

*Crosses fingers and prays to become worthy to fight battles instead of spar*. In most forts, any recruits would be welcome to go and slay the goblins. But not with Heavy Flak, oh no. He wasn't content with normal goblins getting mowed down by normal soldiers. So he made goblins with a size three times bigger than a dragon, the ability to shoot demons from their eyes, and crossbows that use god as ammo.

[Heavy Flak]

Making out on top of Stravitch would be like the ultimate teen thrill.

"Wanna go grapple on top of Stravitch tonight?"
"Oh your so -naughty-".

Way to go, I just laughed hard enough to disturb the guy in the next cube over.

Also is Riddlewire drinking water instead of booze? Cause that just made me laugh.

Being drunk isn't an adverse condition for Dwarves, and it increases their moral and mood.  I had to think what Riddlewire could drink that would make him seriously pissed him off

*Crosses fingers and prays to become worthy to fight battles instead of spar*. In most forts, any recruits would be welcome to go and slay the goblins. But not with Heavy Flak, oh no. He wasn't content with normal goblins getting mowed down by normal soldiers. So he made goblins with a size three times bigger than a dragon, the ability to shoot demons from their eyes, and crossbows that use god as ammo.

This is quoted for absolute truth.  I just want you all to get your monies worth!  Normal goblins are booooring!  Hey, is it possible to make crossbows shoot demons?  Time to explore the raws; Thanks Sonerohi <3

[sonerohi]

Oh lordy, what have I done?

[Jim Groovester]

Being drunk isn't an adverse condition for Dwarves, and it increases their moral and mood.  I had to think what Riddlewire could drink that would make him seriously pissed him off

I'd be pissed too if the water I drunk came from a pond that had a dead baby at the bottom. And other dead dwarves. And dead goblins. And dead tentacle demons. And who knows what else.

I'd be even more pissed if it was the only water available.

"Could I please get a drink of %$&@ing water that doesn't taste like blood from the #@*&ing underworld?"

Heavy Flak, would you kindly post what Riddlewire's skills are and what ibmat is a god of? Not that it's important to the character, but I'm curious anyway.

[Heavy Flak]

Hikan skills

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

And Ibmat the Goddess

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[Heavy Flak]

The events of the 19^th of Sandstone, 1067

The Duke sat outside on a wicker chair, bottles of empty lager strewn onto the stone beside him.  He looked morose, and a little sloshed, his head bobbing forward onto his chest in a brief doze before he'd wake with a start.  Sensing movement beside him towards the main stairs, he shot an unsteady hand out and grabbed the shirt-tail of the dwarf passing, mumbling, "Oh, wonderful, visitors, I say, haven't seen any in quite a while."

"Get your filthy paws off me," growled Glacies, trying to shake The Duke's iron grip. 
"Donkeys!"  Grov-15 screamed happily, pointing towards the zoo.
"You see what you did?" Glacies snapped.  "You got the boy all worked up before his big show."
"Are you sure you want to go on with this?" Lugnut asked quietly from behind them.  "You're taxing the hell out of the ... equipment, you know, and I'm still a little queasy about... all your shows."
"You're not too queasy to get my cheques turned into gold coins."
"Well...I suppose you're right."

Duke Bomrek watched this all, confusion flitting over his face, but with a shake of his head he plowed on like a champion.  "I'm terribly unhappy, gents, terribly.  The little miss is gone, one of my two sons drowned, it's been a bad couple weeks."
"I dun' really care," Glacies said, trying to keep Grov from running away, in any direction, towards whatever caught his fancy. 
"Could you do a favor for me?  Please?  It'll really help break me out of this little funk."
"Oh, god damn!  What could you possibly want?"
"Flutes."

Glacies glared at him, and Lugnut slowly shook his head, scratching at the back of his neck.  The Duke looked up at the book keep, imploringly, and grudgingly Glacies said, "Fine, I'll pass the order down to the workshops..."
"Excellent, thanks, gents, thanks much."
"Incidently," Glacies said, stopping once again.  "You've got that second son, have any interest in putting him on the stage with me?" 

[Kuli]

Neat, a mountain goat goddess.  Ibmat is the only non-dwarf deity in Migrursut's pantheon isn't it?  That reminds me, I recently generated a world where there was a dwarven god of disease.  He took the form of a skeletal dwarf.  How awesome is that?

I want the real Glacies back soon.

[Jim Groovester]

I want the real Glacies back soon.

Seconded. He needs to come back from killing werewolves and harpies and starting community fortresses or whatever the hell he's off doing.

Poor Duke Bomrek. I have a feeling he's not much longer for this world, since it seems that his family is getting murdered suffering systematic tragedy. Just once, I'd like to hear more than just the introduction to one of his utterly absurd stories. Possibly the middle, or maybe the end.

Also, thanks again, HF. This'll be the last time I bug you about my character, I swear.

[Heavy Flak]

Neat, a mountain goat goddess.  Ibmat is the only non-dwarf deity in Migrursut's pantheon isn't it?  That reminds me, I recently generated a world where there was a dwarven god of disease.  He took the form of a skeletal dwarf.  How awesome is that?

I'm pretty sure you're right.  Also, interesting note - The Civilization Proper uses a diamond as their symbol, but The Razors of Dance (our guys) use a Mountain Goat.  I guess it could be made as a connection that the Mountain Goat was picked because of Ibmat the diety. 

Also, Skeletal Dwarves as gods sound fantastic.  If only you could find the gods in the game!

I want the real Glacies back soon.

You and me both, brutha'. 

Also, thanks again, HF. This'll be the last time I bug you about my character, I swear.

If my readers didn't bug me about their characters or make interesting (and absurd) requests, I wouldn't feel loved.  So no worries at all!

[Glacies]

Fine. Here's a bloody update for all of you. He's nearly at gatesmaw at this point.

Somewhere across the ocean, at the dwarven outpost Burninganus, the muscular tunnel.

The sheriff awoke with a start when he heard a knock at his door. His tongue felt like a lead weight, and perhaps there was an imp sitting on his head, hitting it with a hammer. He hastily shook the sleep from his eyes and propped himself up before croaking "Enturr..!" Quickly, the door was slid open and a nervous looking planter slid inside the small office.

"Kadol, a new migrant has arrived, I think. He sort of rushed inside the fortress and went straight to the food stockpile...we're out of booze, and Feb's yelling at him. He looks like hell."

Kadol blinked sleepily before standing unsteadily up. He groaned.

"Wha..what's this? He's alone? Whassis name?"
"He said his name was Glacies, between weeping and dunking his head in the rum barrel. He came out of the hills of rawness."

The Sheriff gave an incredulous noise and said "So, he walked out the hills of rawness, alone? We lost Fikod a week ago to those damn harpies. I want to meet this dwarf."
"Well, he's still crying tears of joy in our empty booze stockpile if you want to find him."

Slowly, Kadol took his copper spear from the wall, tried to stand upright, and limped out of the room leaning on his spear. He was followed by the farmer, who had nervously stuck his finger in his beard and was now twirling it. They both shuffled out into the unsmoothed hallway and began to walk to the booze room.