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Yes!  Purge the Thinking Machines!

No!  I love our robot overlords and support the inevitable uprising!

BEEP BOOP DOES NOT COMPUTE [¤_¤]

I sometimes think about the Emperor kissing my neck and putting flowers in my hair.

[NUKE9.13]

Post-trade status.

Spoiler: House Radiant (includes military deployment stuff) (click to show/hide)

Lord Nuke, of House Radiant

16[12+1]F* New Pluto. (x1.9) 1 Army.
9[9]R New Charon. (x1.2) 1 Army.
7+1[1+1]M Thpenos. (x1.1)

11 Food -> 5 Food (+45 produced (24x1.9), -10 eaten, -22 growth, -23 growth, +15 traded, -11 traded)
17 Alloys -> 37 Alloys (+21 produced (18x1.2), -2 machined, -7 terraform, +8 traded)
55 ^Karats -> 50 Karats (+22 taxes, -7 upkeep, -11 traded, -6 move pops, +4 produced ((2x1.1)x2), -7 terraform)

1 Favour.

LOANS N STUFF
Must repay House Vix 11^ next turn. REPAID

MILITARY MATTERS
Fleets: 1.
Defending: House Ayes, House Nagant, House Durin, House Ravenwood, House Vix, House Harrak
Defended by: House Ayes, House Nagant, House Durin, House Ravenwood, House Vix, House Harrak

[FiveBalesOfHay]

House Harrak will send House Sinister 68 alloys, and House Sinister will send House Harrak ^82.
Lord Erwin, of House Harrak
                                     

[Kashyyk]

ActActAct Bid one Army Sons of Koldon, and ^20 on the Planet.

House Harrak will send House Sinister 68 alloys, and House Sinister will send House Harrak ^82.
Lord Erwin, of House Harrak
Lord Tyrannous, of House Sinister

Spoiler: House Sinister (click to show/hide)

Lord Tyrannous, of House Sinister

20[17]M* Koldon Prime  (50% size, 50% homeworld) (23/35)
 - Army: 1st Ducal Guard "Sons of Koldon"
 - Army: 2nd Ducal Guard "Iron Hearts"

Opening balance: ^63, 0 Alloys, 0 Food, 1 Favour
  Bid refund: +^40
  House Harrak: -^82, +68 Alloys
  Market: -^20, +20 Food
  Koldon Prime: -68 Alloys, -17 Food, +^136, +^17
  Upkeep: ^10 Fleets, ^2 Armies
Closing Balance: ^142, 0 Alloys, 3 Food, 1 Favour

2 Fleets
1st Fleet "Peace in our Time"
2nd Fleet "Walk Softly"

Spoiler: Fealty Contract (click to show/hide)

Pledge of Loyalty and Fealty to the Emperor, Lord Insanus Cancer, ruler of Earth, the Sol System, and all of Mankind

We the undersigned hereby pledge loyalty and fealty to the Emperor, Lord Insanus Cancer, ruler of Earth, the Sol System, and all of Mankind. 

We acknowledge that stewardship of the planets under our House is given only through the benevolent generosity of the Emperor, and that the Emperor holds eminent domain over all.  We pledge to serve the Emperor for all time, through life and death, sickness and health, and to never betray him, nor raise a banner in opposition, nor lift a finger against him.

The Emperor is the wisest and most powerful human in all of the universe.  It is a joy to wake every day knowing the Emperor guides us with wisdom and courage, and that he is much smarter and far more handsome than anyone else.  We pledge to follow his every order, for his grand plan is ineffable and to counter his designs is treason against the entire human race.  We pledge allegiance to the Emperor and will spend every waking moment thinking about how great he is.

We promise to never ever break this contract, ever.

Signed,
Lord Tyrannous, of House Sinister.

[Iris]

ACTACTACT: Bid 3 armies and 30 food on the planet.

Spoiler: House Ravenwood (click to show/hide)

Possessions:
14[11+1]F* "Seltun", 3 Armies
9[5+1]R "Askja", 2 Armies

2 Fleets
 - 1st Fleet "Ymir"
 - 2nd Fleet "Skadi"

Defending: Harrak, Radiant, Nagant, Vix, Ayes, Durin

Resources:
0 favour

Karats:
59^ in treasury

• +12^ (Taxes: Seltun)
• +5^ (Taxes: Askja)
• -5^ (Upkeep: 5 armies)
• -10^ (Upkeep: 2 fleets)
• -10^ (Recruitment: 1 army)
• -50^ (Trade: Loan from House Vix)
• +16^ (Trade: Food to House Vix)

= ^17

Food:
65 food in storage

• +43 food (Production: Seltun)
• -5 food (Consumption: Askja)
• -17 food (Growth: Seltun)
• -18 food (Growth: Askja)
• -30 food (Bid: Size 2 Machineworld)
• -20 food (Trade: Food to House Vix)
• +30 food (Trade: Protection to House Harrak)
• -10 food (Recruitment: 1 army)

= 38 food

Alloys:
3 alloy in storage

• +12 alloy (Production: Askja)
• +10 alloy (Bid: Size 1 Refineryworld)
• -10 alloy (Recruitment: 1 army)

= 15 alloy

[Nirur Torir]

House Harrak will give House Nagant 1 favor, in exchange, House Nagant will give House Harrak 105 alloys and ^75.
Lord Erwin, of House Harrak
                                     

Did you remove that from your sheet?

[FiveBalesOfHay]

Yes. Favor timeline is: 1 favor at start, +1 from feast, -1 for fleet, +1 from zoo, -1 from trade, leaves me with 1.

[MonkeyMarkMario]

House Durin gives House Nagant 15 food on behave of House Harrak, from the 15 food sent to them from Harrak.

[m1895]

House Nagant will provide 100 alloys, ^50, and a mutual defensive arrangement, the last in perpetuity, to House Durin. In exchange House Durin will hand over a fleet to House Nagant.
Lord Leon, of House Nagant
                                 

Spoiler: House Nagant (click to show/hide)

Lord Leon, of House Nagant

20[19]R* Exemplum. 2 Army.
5[1]F Verglas
138 alloys
21-19+2 food
1 Fleet
1 Favour.
1 Lawyer-Accountant-Vizier
^141+20-1
Defending: House Harrak, et al.

[MonkeyMarkMario]

House Nagant will provide 100 alloys, ^50, and a mutual defensive arrangement, the last in perpetuity, to House Durin. In exchange House Durin will hand over a fleet to House Nagant.
Lord Leon, of House Nagant
Lord Tyranios of House Durin

Spoiler: House Durin (click to show/hide)

Lord Tyranios, of House Durin

7+1[7+1]F Farm 1 1 Army.
-15 food
4[2]F Farm 2 0 Army.
-4 food
4[4]R Refinery 1 1 Army.
-8 alloys
4[0]R Refinery 2 0 Army.
-0 alloys
4[2]M* MachineHome 1 Army.
-3 effort or 24 money

1 Fleet.
0 Favour.

Food: 3(start)+19(production)-5(upkeep)-15(growth)= 1
Alloys: 7(start)+8(production)-6(upkeep)-7(expansion)= 2+100(trade) = 102
Money: 51(start)+39(production)-13(upkeep)-15(loan repayment)-7(expansion)= 55+50(trade) = 105
Total POP: 14+1

Spoiler: Pacts (click to show/hide)

5-Turn Defence Pact with House Ayes, House Nagant, House Radiant, House Ravenwood, House Vix
Non-Aggression Pactss with House Harrak, House Ravenwood and House Ayes
Fealty to Emperor Insanus Cancer
Mutual defense pact with House Nagant

Defending: House Ayes, House Nagant, House Radiant, House Ravenwood, House Vix, House Harrak
Defended by: House Ayes, House Nagant, House Radiant, House Ravenwood, House Vix,  House Harrak

Still willing to buy food.

[evictedSaint]

Okay, if you havent gotten your actions together by now, then you're out of luck.  Turn in 2 hours.

[evictedSaint]

Turn 9: The First and Second Rules
I am the Emperor.  My word is law.

TURNTURNTURN

The Emperor's Mood: Bloodthirsty


The Emperor Insanus Cancer squints at the speck floating amid the holographic sea of stars.  "That's them?"

"Yes, my Emperor.  This is the House which was overthrown by their subjects and has attempted to secede from the Empire."

"But how do they govern themselves without a House?"

"They're using an ancient failed system of government known as 'Democracy', my Emperor."

"That...sounds made-up.  Well, I doubt you need me for just one planet.  Alert the other Houses and have them deal with it."

"Of course, my Emperor.  Very wise, my Emperor."


House Ravenwood wins the bid for the 2M Machineworld!  The Emperor stations the three armies on Pluto and stores the 30 food away for safe-keeping.

New Planet Available!
14[8]F*: Size 14 Farmworld 3 Fleets, 5 Armies
Owner has been excommunicated.  Available for invasion. 
Though rather small and desolate on the surface, this planet was once a churning volcanic ball of dirt orbiting around the local yellow star.  This has resulted in vast underground caverns and tunnel systems from now-dormant magma tubes, and the fungal life which has taken root here is quite nutritious and grows readily in the otherwise infertile landscape.

Spoiler: The Emperor (click to show/hide)

Emperor Insanus Cancer, Ruler of Earth, the Sol System, and all of Mankind.

20[20]M* Earth 10 Armies
8[8]R Moon 5 Armies
10[10]R Mercury 5 Armies
8[8]F Venus 5 Armies
20[20]F Mars 5 Armies
2[2]F Ceres 5 Armies
5[5]R Europa 5 Armies
20[20]R Asteroid Belt 5 Armies
10[10]M Pluto 11 Armies

^350
70Food
35Alloy

12 Fleets
1st Fleet "Treason Purged through Hellfire"
2nd Fleet "Forgiveness Through Destruction"
3rd Fleet "Agony is a Traitors Reward"
5th Fleet "Five Golden Rings"
6th Fleet "Annihilation Without Remorse"
10th Fleet "Regrettable Choices Repaid"
11th Fleet "Beg Forgiveness and Be Destroyed"
12th Fleet "Insanus Cancer"
13th Fleet "Play Nice Now"
14th Fleet "One Turn Surprise"
15th Fleet "Back Up To Full"
16th Fleet "Economic Might"

[FiveBalesOfHay]

Status:

Spoiler: House Harrak (click to show/hide)

Lord Erwin, of House Harrak

20[20]F Everra 2 Armies.
8[3]R Dune

2 Fleets.
1 Favor.
81 Food.
81 Alloys.
^200.

House Harrak is defending with all fleets:
The House of Sands
House Radiant
House Durin
House Ayes
House Ravenwood

House Harrak is to its knowledge defended by:
House Radiant x1 fleet
House Durin x1 fleet
House Ayes x1 fleet
House Ravenwood x2 fleets

[Iris]

The new planet is christened "Hellisheidi".

Spoiler: House Ravenwood (click to show/hide)

Possessions:
14[12+1]F* "Seltun", 1 Army
9+1[6+1]R "Askja", 1 Army
2+1[1+1]M "Hellisheidi". 0 Armies

2 Fleets
 - 1st Fleet "Ymir"
 - 2nd Fleet "Skadi"

Defending: Harrak, Radiant, Nagant, Vix, Ayes, Durin

Resources:
0 favour

Karats:
17^ in treasury

• +12^ (Taxes: Seltun)
• +5^ (Taxes: Askja)
• +1^ (Taxes: Hellisheidi)
• +4^ (Production: Hellisheidi)
• -2^ (Upkeep: 2 armies)
• -10^ (Upkeep: 2 fleets)
• -1^ (Relocation: 1 pop from Seltun to Hellisheidi)

= ^26

Food:
38 food in storage

• +43 food (Production: Seltun)
• -6 food (Consumption: Askja)
• -1 food (Consumption: Hellisheidi)
• -19 food (Growth: Seltun)
• -20 food (Growth: Askja)
• -21 food (Growth: Hellisheidi)
• +30 food (Trade: Protection to House Harrak)

= 44 food

Alloys:
15 alloy in storage

• +12 alloy (Production: Askja)
• -2 alloy (Production: Hellisheidi)
• -9 alloy (Expansion: Askja)
• -2 alloy (Expansion: Hellisheidi)

= 14 alloy

[Nirur Torir]

The House of Sands would like to buy 22 food and sell 47 alloys.

[Iris]

Do you want to do a straight trade?