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If it helps any, I can relate. I hope it helps at least.
The illness/mental illness thing is ... odd and historically weird. Of course you're right concerning many transphobia motivations. You just are right.
It sucks being considered sick/crazy just by being transgender, because for far too many mean people that's their insulting way to dehumanize us.
If transgender people have a higher instance of depression and anxiety, then I would bet it might be related to all the crap we are put through.
If there is any redeeming ... anything ... to being classified as a mental disorder, it would be arguing for insurance coverage and health protections.
DMS-IV TR and DSM V could at least in theory be used to try for insurance coverage. Some private insurers have been nicer about coverage due to that.
I mean, expensive treatment costs being covered is a good thing, but I can totally see not wanting to be stigmatized. HIPAA protections might help. etc.
As for my own experiences, I've seen the what I imagine to be all of the three types you mention: those who don't think we're actually mentally ill and are just trying to be cruel, those who just treat mental illness rather poorly, and the ones who think they're helpful but aren't/are hiding they are mean. I also imagine things have changed in ... 20 or 30 years as well.
I'm glad you (unless I'm wrong which I might be) appear to be able to transition. It's nice to see someone able to get that and I'm glad.
If nothing else I don't think it's quite as completely horrid as it used to be in all cases so... some improvement I hope? I almost posted one of those trigger warning things with a spoiler of a story of some not great transphobic abuse from my childhood, but I don't know if people want to read that and I'm not trying to distress anyone. I'm just glad that probably doesn't happen to others anymore or at least not as much. I still think it might be generally worse in rural areas than in cities but what do I know.
I am somewhat upset there were protestors at a gay wedding around here recently. It was only a couple of people but still. The couple wasn't trans I don't think, but rather two lesbians. I don't get it. The horses haven't started eating each other like they said would happen if gay people got married, and there are still some out there who just.... Hate it all the same?
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