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[IncompetentFortressMaker]

Other option is to Animate Machete like usual and let it have at them. It's riskier but gives us more of a longterm plan than panic healing.

+1

+1. Also, is animating the machete a full-turn action? If not, we might want to do something else as well, but I'm guessing it is.

[Weirdsound]

Other option is to Animate Machete like usual and let it have at them. It's riskier but gives us more of a longterm plan than panic healing.

You wave your hand, animating the Machete with the standing orders "have at them".

The Machete swings at the northmost cockroach.

Diode moves into position, and both it and Jameson attack the respective bugs directly in front of them.

Gray pulls out a fistfull of Gauntlet Goo, which disolves into green and purple temporal flames to launch at the roach directly in front of you!

-1 Gauntlet Goo from Gray's inventory

Machete Chop to Hit: 12 + 8 = 20
Chop Damage: 5

Externally Sourced Smite to Hit: 10 + 9 = 19
3d10 Damage: 5 + 5 + 4 = 14

Horn Attack to Hit: 19 + 5 = 24
Damage: 4 + 1 = 5

Diode Punch to Hit: 6 + 3 = 9

The Machete and Undead Minotuar each kill their target with melee attacks, proving that these roaches are better at inflicting damage than taking it.

Gray's blast seems to rend the cockroach in front of you from existance complete, leaving not even a single smear of ichor where it was just standing.

Diode throws a derpy punch that doesn't even come close to overpowering its target's exoskeleton to do real damage.

The enemy dweller blows a pink and green smoke ring from its pipe towards the remaining roach. The smoke seems to invigorate the bug, causing it to make an attack each against Jameson and Diode!

The undead mutant takes a step foward, and points towards the remains of the cockroach slain by Jameson. The flies it is wearing swarm from its body, consume every ounce of the roach's flesh in a matter of moments, and return to their host who begins to glow.

Jameson is hit once, for 3 damage.
Diode blocks an incoming attack.

The invigorated and fast moving cockroach manages to graze Jameson's chin, but Diode's shield takes care of the mandibles headed in the golem's direction.



How do you proceed?

Assets by DALL-E, Midjourney, and Playground AI. Character Sheet. Minimap.

[King Zultan]

Lets have Jameson and Diode finish off that bug while everyone else goes after the stoner and that weird guy.

[IronyOwl]

Glowing is bad. Glowing pigs are less bad.

Charge forward and cast Curse of Circe on the glowing undead thing.


We could instead use Narrate Epic Deed on Jameson to be safe and try to get another attack in, but it is 1/dungeon so we'd be out of undead healing.

[IncompetentFortressMaker]

Charge forward and cast Curse of Circe on the glowing undead thing.

+1. We need to take that sucker's special abilities out of the equation.

[Weirdsound]

Glowing is bad. Glowing pigs are less bad.

Charge forward and cast Curse of Circe on the glowing undead thing.

You charge foward waving your hands and reciting Homer. In a puff of pink smoke, the winged undead mutant becomes a winged pig.

The Machete also blitzes foward, intent to chop up the dweller stoner. Gray burns another unit of Gauntlet Goo to unleash heavy magical overkill against the same target!

Diode and Jameson pummel the roach.

CHOP: 16 + 8 = 24
Damage: 5 + 2 = 7

Overkill Magic go Brrrrrrrrrrrrr: 8 + 9 = 17
3d10 Damage: 5 + 5 + 5 = 15

Horn Attack: 15 + 5 = 20
Damage: 1 + 1 = 2

Golem PAUNCH: 5 + 3 = 8

You are not sure if it is the spell or the machete that deals the final blow to the shades wearing enemy, but you watch as he is thoroughly obliterated in a matter of mere moments by your allies.

Things go less well against the roach; Jameson only lands a glancing blow, and Diode wiffs completely on its attack.

The cockroach lashes out at Jameson. The pig closes the distance and tries to bite Gray!

Jameson is hit once for 10 Damage!
Gray is hit once for 5 Damage!

The Roach's mandibles find Jameson. This time a significant chunk is removed from the minotaur's torso, nearly bisecting it!

The pig charges Gray, jumps, and land a bite somewhere that you are sure makes Gray glad that the Heartkeepers forgot to assign them a biological sex.



How do you proceed?

Assets by DALL-E, Midjourney, and Playground AI. Character Sheet. Minimap.

[IronyOwl]

3/28 HP

Definitely Narrate Epic Deed on Jameson.

[ZBridges]

3/28 HP

Definitely Narrate Epic Deed on Jameson.

+1

[IncompetentFortressMaker]

Definitely Narrate Epic Deed on Jameson.

+1
Since there's not anyone immediately near us, that's probably all we can do this round, other than moving toward Jameson if necessary to cast that.
Also, that poor stoner. He got one-twoed and probably has one hell of a headache wherever he ended up right about now.
...looking over our raw materials list, now I'm wondering if stoner golems are a thing because of the roach powder being narcotics and magic.

[IronyOwl]

...looking over our raw materials list, now I'm wondering if stoner golems are a thing because of the roach powder being narcotics and magic.

Huh. Guess they must be.

Though given that we've seen undead and golem creation so far, there might be more kinds of minions you can make out of roach meth. Summon a narcotics demon? Grow a potted pot minion? Animate a cocaine table?

[IncompetentFortressMaker]

minions you can make out of roach meth

That is going in the quotes thread. Taken out of context it's absolutely golden.

[Weirdsound]

3/28 HP

Definitely Narrate Epic Deed on Jameson.

You clear your throat and begin narrate...

Pushed to his limit, the mighty monster Jameson dug deep, catching a second... unwind? Fueled by his unatural hatred for all life save his master and allies, Jameson struck with haste, using his newly restored vigor to bring his terrible horns down upon his foe...

Horn Attack to Hit: 6 + 5 = 11

...but lo and behold, the wicked insect proved to nimble for Jameson, and deftly avoided the attack.

With your narration complete Jameson and Diode load up for another round of attacks against the last bug. Gray and the Machete, the former of whom pulls out his own new blade for the melee engagement, remain focused on the pig.

Emo used Cut: 6 + 2 = 8

Machete Chop: 18 + 8 = 26
Damage: 2 + 2 = 4

Horn Attack: 12 + 5 = 17
Damage: 4 + 1 = 5

Diode PAUNCH: 17 + 3 = 20
Damage: 4 + 1 = 5

Diode and Jameson finally crush the final cockroach under a hail of horns and fists, reducing it to a pile of limbs and a green smear.

Gray proves to be, at least initially, incompetent with the new knife, coming closer to chopping off their own finger than they do to slicing some pork. The animated Machete, however, has no such issues and breaks open a reasonable sized wound in the transformed fool's flesh.

The pig takes one more bite at Gray...

Gray is targeted by an attack, but avoids it!

...Before turning tail and fleeing to the north, drawing opportunity attacks from Yourself, Gray, and the Machete.

Walking Stick to Hit: 14 + 2 = 16
Damage: 3

Gray's Knife to Hit: 18 + 2 = 20
Damage: 4 + 1 = 5

CHOP! to hit: !!20!! + 8 = OOOOooooooh babay! Critical Hit!
Damage = 2 + 1 + 2 = 5

Gray and the Machete soften the target up with some competent bladework, and you land the finishing blow by bringing your walking stick down on the pig's skull. You hear a loud crack and feel bone break as the pig falls to the ground, deathly still! The Machete de-animates and returns to your backpack.



You catch your breath, and reflect upon how this encounter made you feel...

Do you feel:
Triumphant for Winning the Fight...
Burning anger that these local Florida Dungeon Men turned on you for simply traveling with Gray...
Fusterated that their ambush cost you so many resources...

How do you proceed?

Assets by DALL-E, Midjourney, and Playground AI. Character Sheet. Minimap.

[IncompetentFortressMaker]

Hm, well, honestly I feel like we might want to take a non-T memory here because of the whole memory-limit thing.
As for next actions: Test magnifying glass on unharvested corpses, then harvest corpses; then see if it has anything to say about harvested resources before we grab them. Pay particular attention to anything stoner guy and mutant-turned-pig have left behind, they're bound to be interesting.
edit: I initially thought the machete was still lying around, corrected myself.

[King Zultan]

Hm, well, honestly I feel like we might want to take a non-T memory here because of the whole memory-limit thing.
As for next actions: Test magnifying glass on unharvested corpses, then harvest corpses; then see if it has anything to say about harvested resources before we grab them. Pay particular attention to anything stoner guy and mutant-turned-pig have left behind, they're bound to be interesting.
edit: I initially thought the machete was still lying around, corrected myself.

+1

[ZBridges]

How about a burning memory that we can use to increase our HP?