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[Nonanonymous]

After my previous adventurer was killed by that child (and for future reference, I named the child Ninten), I made another adventurer to exterminate the civilization. The first town was completely empty of life after the adventurer had gone through it, and so I decided to assault the twisted remains of Yawningtold, holding a few children (incuding Ninten), one very lucky guard, and my super adventurer Doom. Exceptional scimitar ready, I charged in...

and was promptly one-shotted by my newbie adventurer Lucas.

  My current adventurer is off louging with the goblins at the moment after killing off most of another town and swimming around murdering at least 650 fish.

Wait, Ninten?  I thought he beat you to death with his bare hands, not burned you to death with PK Fire.

[unobtaniumman]

After my previous adventurer was killed by that child (and for future reference, I named the child Ninten), I made another adventurer to exterminate the civilization. The first town was completely empty of life after the adventurer had gone through it, and so I decided to assault the twisted remains of Yawningtold, holding a few children (incuding Ninten), one very lucky guard, and my super adventurer Doom. Exceptional scimitar ready, I charged in...

and was promptly one-shotted by my newbie adventurer Lucas.

  My current adventurer is off louging with the goblins at the moment after killing off most of another town and swimming around murdering at least 650 fish.

For some reason, Ninten reminds me of the old Tom and Jerry cartoon where a superstrong mouse grabs Tom by the ankles and swings him around like a ragdoll. Only on DF, such an act would paint the walls with Cat Chunks. Which would rot, because noone wants to haul them to the refuse pile.

Speaking of which, how much do YOUR dwarves ignore the bucher's shop?

[Jackrabbit]

how did you play as a hydra?

[Nonanonymous]

One of my latest adventurer's firt random encounters was against a giant crocodile.  I thought I might be able to take it down, and move into range to initiate a grapple.  After successfully grabbing it by the body and about two fumbled attempts to throw it down, the crocodile bites my adventurer in the lower body and easily yanks it off.  Three turns into my first encounter, and I died epicly.

[LegacyCWAL]

I haven't played much Adventure Mode, but there was one particularly bad one recently:

I went to a goblin tower and wound up with the demon himself sending me to kill a titan.  I went to the cave, searched every square inch, couldn't find him.  I went out to the travel map and moved a step away and them back, and tried again.  When I appeared, half my expendable dupes buddies were nowhere to be seen.  And then I started getting combat messages.  The "missing" ones had found, attacked, and would eventually kill the titan.  I never even found the corpse.

So I went back to the goblin tower, figuring that I would just leave out the part where my job was done by a few drunks and an elf with a pointy stick.  And...I couldn't find the demon.  I couldn't even find any flashing goblins either.  A titan so dangerous that a demon saw it as a threat was dead, and...well, I guess I shouldn't have been surprised that a demon screwed me over.


And in my current fortress, there's plenty of Epic Fail to go around.  But in one case, a picture really is worth a thousand words:

[Nonanonymous]

That looks less epic fail, and more "Interrupted by carp."

[LegacyCWAL]

On the surface, perhaps.

That's a magnetite deposit, and the engraved area is a native platinum vein.  Thanks to a screwup in a previous plumbing project and absent-mindedness in carrying out the mining, his ridiculously rich area (which has the ore Hidden in that picture) is now home to the local river's salmon.

[Reasonableman]

Platinum comes in... veins? I thought it was little 5-ore pockets. 'Sides, that looks rather golden to me.

[Micr0]

I actually committed suicide when a Dark Priest told me too.



I didn't get my reward.

[Neoskel]

I was building my ice tower and had to deconstruct a whole level of flooring to get the stupid snow off (i built most of the tower top-down so as to make a snow umbrella of sorts) and the liason was just about finished talking with my former mayor. Then i happen to look at the jobs screen and notice that my dwarves are storing some dwarf-sized clothing. I thought it was strange, i didn't throw anyone off the tower recently and then used 'c' to zoom in on one of the dwarves hauling clothes. Oh. The liason got killed by falling ice. Oops.

*savescum*

Note to self: don't deconstruct floors when the liason is around.

[olemars]

Platinum comes in... veins? I thought it was little 5-ore pockets. 'Sides, that looks rather golden to me.

I have a large platinum vein in my magnetite deposit in my current fortress as well. Around 40 nuggets all in one go. Good times.

[LegacyCWAL]

Platinum comes in... veins? I thought it was little 5-ore pockets. 'Sides, that looks rather golden to me.

It's usually in little pockets, but magnetite deposits can have veins.

And it looks golden because that's what it looks like when engraved floors get muddy.

[Astus Ater]

Thelire Testedroars, elf born in 3.

In 68, Thelire's left upper arm was burned away by the dragon Sloron Hotdiamond the Spark of Sweltering.

In 68, Thelire's right upper arm was burned away by the dragon Sloron Hotdiamond the Spark of Sweltering.

Ouch. BUt, it gets worse. See, Thelire lived through that encounter, and then:

In 85, Thelire shot and killed the human Thrut Chasmflickers in Seamred.

So, who failed epicly? Thrut, or Thelire?

[Jetman123]

What did he use to draw back the arrow, his mouth?

That would actually be a pretty funny picture. Someone contact an artist. xD

[personjerry]

@ the first post:
Elves aren't supposed to fight animals? Aren't they peaceful? Meaning you can't hit them?