7 Malachite, 212, Mid-Summer
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"Well, which way should we go?" ratNAROk was anxious for more slaying.
"Let's see if we can find where they came from." Zumies ventured deeper into the room where the goblins and hobgoblins had come out of. There appeared to be three rooms connected, all full of barrels and crates stuffed with foul-smelling food - half-rotting rat and cow carcasses and mushrooms picked from deep within a cave suggested the feast that was promised might not have been too appetizing.
In the back of the west room, an opening in the wall lead into a rough cave system. It was through here that the goblin archer had escaped. Scanning the ground, Zumies found the start of the goblin's trail - a few scuff marks through the mud - but the path soon turned to bare stone, and split off into three different paths. It was impossible to know which way the goblin had gone from here.
Yusdrayl grew impatient. "What are you doing? There's nothing down there, those are our hunting grounds. You're wasting time, you can get to the goblins either through the back way where you went before, or through that door over to the east of this chamber!"
"Oh, really?" Space Pants cast Detect Thoughts, scanning Yusdrayl's surface thoughts to see if she was hiding anything. "I'm so close to owning the Citadel!" her thoughts began. "These guys might actually clean out the goblins, leaving the place for us to dominate! But if they get lost... I don't know how the goblins got to us through those caves, but I know there's big nasties in there. They'll slip up, get killed, and then I'll lose my shot at taking over!"
Space Pants called out into the cave, "Keep going, Zumies, you're almost there!"
By now, Zumies had caught on to the troublesome cat's disposition - particularly towards his half-elven nature - and realized that if the cat says to keep going, it's time to turn back. As he was returning, a fly flit by his head, glowing with a Light spell, and flew off down one of the paths to explore.
"So we just go through this door, yeah?" ratNAROk pointed at the door in the northeast. "Do we need that key we found on the troll?"
Yusdrayl cocked her head. "My guard will let you through. Wait, what key? Show me."
Reluctantly, Zumies withdrew the key with the roaring dragon's head and outstretched wings. Yusdrayl's eyes turned wide. "I don't believe it... that's a Noble's key! The nobility of the dragon priests had their quarters on a floor that is guarded with a magic lock. During the calamity that brought the citadel beneath the earth, the nobility of the dragon priests cordoned themselves off and barricaded themselves in an attempt to escape the calamity. I know not where the door is, it must be on the goblin's side... but only those of high rank had those keys. Chances are, whatever's behind that door hasn't been seen or disturbed in over a hundred years. First dibs on whatever treasure awaits... but who knows what else is in there?"
"Alright, I'm goin' then," ratNAROk said. He opened the door to the northeast of the corridor, leading to a small room. "Meepo, there's a trap in here, yeah? Where is it?"
"Oh!" the kobold replied, "The first step is safe. Next step, pit trap - like the others, there's a two-foot wide catwalk down the middle you can cross safely."
ratNAROk crossed the trap, and opened the door on the other side. "Ah- more bushes, piled up in front of the next door!"
"Gee, that's not suspicious," said Bubb.
Without hesitation, ratNAROk walked up and stabbed one of the bushes. It recoiled and thrashed about, causing the four other bushes around it to stir. As suspected, they were twig blights!
Sergei and Edward moved in to strike down the blights. Space Pants lit a torch, handed it to Cutter, and ordered him to attack. The skeleton obliged, setting a twig blight alight and reducing it to kindling.
Erky came in behind the party and saw the melee. All that had transpired for him over the past day - his predicament being caught stuck with these dangerous hooligans, his futile attempt at escape - had weighed on him during their last rest. He questioned his purpose, the path that Thrathdad the Morals of Authority had placed him on. All he knew was that in order to survive, he would need to adapt.
Erky locked eyes with the first goblin he saw. He raised his holy symbol, and recited an incantation with more fervor than ever before. The goblin was caught completely unaware and at the mercy of Sacred Flame, totally failing his attempt to resist, and Erky drew deeper than ever into the divine for critical damage. The goblin was completely engulfed in white flame, turning to ash in seconds.
The party stopped to look at the gnome. His jaw set squarely, he said only two words: "Erky... Berserky."
"Yes, good!" Space Pants urged, an evil smile playing on his lips. "Let the hate flow through you."
Alerted by the sound of combat, the door on the west wall opened, revealing a squad of goblins lead by a few hobgoblins. One of the hobgoblins pointed and shouted in goblin, "Attack!"
Space Pants shouted back in goblin, "Bring it on, you ugly animal!"
"I'll grind you into a paste and chew you up!" said the hobgoblin.
"Yeah? Good luck catching us."
Edward called out, "Alefgard, now!" He cast Sleep on the goblins, clustered up on the other side of the door, and knocked three of them unconscious. Alefgard followed up with an Ice Knife into the center of the group, the sleeping goblins taking the full brunt of the ice shards exploding from the bolt. Most of the troops fell from that attack, but the hobgoblins remained.
"Hyaah!!" ratNAROk raged in, his fur glowing a brilliant gold as divine energy radiated through him, and one of the hobgoblins fell before him. However, the other two took advantage, getting on either side and flanking him. They were able to put him off balance such that when one of them landed a hit with its longsword, the blade cut deeper, almost felling the mousefolk. Thankfully, the second missed, even with its advantage.
Bubb's metal body went motionless as the whole swarm of flies came out and landed upon one of the goblins, gnawing and feasting on its flesh, while Sergei held the front line. With another push, the party overran the remaining hobgoblins, putting the fight to rest.
Searching the bodies, Zumies made an incredibly lucky find - one of the hobgoblins was wearing a horn on its belt, an oxen horn of exceptional quality. Edward also spotted a few platinum coins at the bottom of a well in the room.
As Edward took some time to Identify the horn, Space Pants climbed down into the well. The well was not very deep, but it was fed by an underground river. It appeared the well was built into an eddy around a bend, so water flowed freely in and out of the channel that fed the well. Space Pants fired a crossbow bolt with a rope tied to it, and stuck it to the ceiling to keep himself tethered. There was a current that threatened to pull him under, but Space Pants had no trouble swimming to the bottom and obtaining three platinum coins.
The horn, it turned out, was a Horn of Silent Alarm - a horn that, when blown, can only be heard by a single target. Unsure what to do with it for now, they pocketed the device. They still had a few items given to them by Yusdrayl that had not yet been identified - some scrolls, the feather token, and a potion - but those would take additional time, and the party was eager to get moving. Oddly, as the party left, Bubb did not return to its metal frame, instead flying free as a swarm.
The next room featured a double row of marble columns, with entwined dragons carved into them. Torches along the walls burned and filled the room with a haze. There were many doors in this hall, including one of olivine to the west, and one of obsidian in the center north. The obsidian door bore a mark of a dragon with its mouth open and wings outstretched over the handle.
"Hey, that looks like the key we found on the troll. Let's see if it fits." Zumies tried the key - the lock
clicked, and the door swung open. Behind it was a dusty stairway leading down. A chilling, haunting hiss echoed up the stairs.
"Creepy," said Meepo.
"Well, are we going down?" asked Zumies.
"I'd kinda like to check these other doors first," said ratNAROk. "Let's see what's behind these others first."
ratNAROk opened the door to the left of the stairway, revealing a hallway full of giant rats.
Bubb immediately flew in and set upon the nearest rat, picking away at its flesh. The other rats backed away in terror. ratNAROk followed close behind, and listened to what the rats were saying. "Feast? Feast?" some were squeaking, while others, "Fear! Fear!"
ratNAROk addressed them in squeakspeak. "You want a feast? Try eating goblin! Plenty of them to go around."
The rats looked at each other, and squeaked in appeasement. "Feast! Feast! The goblins shall be our feast!"
The rats ran off down the hallway. ratNAROk followed a short way, and found that the rats were piling up against another door of olivine at the end of the hall.
"Look at that," said Sergei. "They think goblins are food, and they think there's food in there... which means, there must be goblins in there!"
"Oh yeah? I've got an answer for that!" Overnight, Zumies had figured out the secrets of magic, adding an arcane layer to his subterfuge. He cast Mage Hand, and used it to reach out over the rats and open the door.
The rats poured into the room. Shrieks and cries from goblins - including women and children - bounced off the walls down the hall. The hungry rats set upon the goblins in seconds, tearing into them in a furry feeding frenzy.
"Watch this room be like the goblin elementary school or something awful," Bubb said with concern.
"I hope so!" said Meepo.
"Uh oh," said Sergei, "I think we found their home. Do we really want to kill commoners?"
Without waiting for a reply, Zumies walked up to the nearest goblin - who was unarmed and trembling - and stuck his rapier through its chest.
"Well, that answers that," said Edward. "The only good goblin's a dead goblin!"
Most of the goblins were running away, out a door to the east which lead into the hazy double-columned room they were in before. About a dozen more came forward to defend with swords and bows, but had to contend with the rats first before reaching the party. During the commotion, a goblin stepped out of the round room in the northwest corner - a shaman, by her looks. She carried a staff with a skull on top and wore a crown of antlers. Seeing the carnage, she slammed the door shut, and could be heard screaming, "Durnn, we're under attack! Help us!"
"Durnn..." Meepo perked up. "The chieftain of the Durbuluk tribe! We're taking him on head-on!"
"Tell him to come on out, I've got something for him!" Alefard pulled out a sack, and withdrew a ball of fur from it. He through the ball into the room and it transformed into an axebeak - a large bird with a powerful beak, hence the name - and immediately started pecking its way through the goblin horde.
"Erky... Berserky... Erky... Berserky... Erky!!... Berserky!! Rraghablarghablarghablah!!"
Erky smashed his fists against his skull and let out a crazed howl. In a full blown rage, he ran into the fray, disregarding his deity and his own safety in favor of lashing out recklessly with his scimitar.
Space Pants grinned as he saw the opportunity for mischief. He turned to Edward the bard and said, "Look away, you're not gonna want to sing about this part." He then ventured back, to where he saw the goblin commoners running out.
"Hey!" Space Pants called out, while simultaneously casting Charm on the goblin in the lead. "There's a way out under the well! That's how I got here. You guys should go jump into that well and swim out of here!"
The goblin paused only briefly to consider what Space Pants had said, but in its panic, it didn't seem able to focus on the words. The spell having failed, Space Pants yawned. "Lame. Alright, Cutter, do your thing."
Wordlessly, the skeleton complied, cutting down the goblin commoner in the lead. The others behind screamed, but with nowhere else to go, continued stampeding through the hall. The battle raged on inside the goblin's home, while Space Pants thought of another way to toy with those escaping.