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Author Topic: SPAMKINGDOM uhhh 5? King Bubba of Rug!  (Read 14162 times)

Yellow Pixel

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM uhhh 5? King Bubba of Rug!
« Reply #165 on: October 13, 2021, 12:14:05 pm »

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Kashyyk

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM uhhh 5? King Bubba of Rug!
« Reply #166 on: October 13, 2021, 12:26:23 pm »

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Haspen

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM uhhh 5? King Bubba of Rug!
« Reply #167 on: October 13, 2021, 12:47:34 pm »

You agree to spend the money on the relief efforts.

The delegation heaps praise upon your name before leaving.

803 NWE, Mid-Spring

Quote
5

Your heart races in relief when you read the lengthy scroll brought to you by one of the agents of the Spymaster.

In it, he details that the squire whom your wife and queen was meeting so often is in fact her distant cousin, and Hege was working as a matchmaker between him and one of her maids, because their parents are in a feud. The Spymaster's agents followed the love birds for a while and found them to be just ordinary lovebirds. A secret ceremony before the altar of Old Gods was observed by the agents, which Hege also attended, formalizing a marriage between the squire and the maid just a week ago.

The newlyweds promptly left the castle to seek a new home and a new life together elsewhere, and far from their families, too.

You were, indeed, worrying too much.

803 NWE, Summer

You receive a notice from one of the southernmost feudal ladies.

Countess Dessa reports that recently, her people have been 'disappearing' into the mountains, and it reached a scale that the countess decided to investigate. As it turns out, less savory elements of the population have created several secluded settlements and have even started mining some iron and silver they've found during their 'seclusion'.

As the mountains are technically part of Kingdom of Rug but do not belong to the fief of the countess, she has forwarded this issue for you.

"They're illegally exploiting riches that belong to the Crown, your Majesty. We have all rights to treat them like criminals they are." Says the Advisor during a council.

"But if there's iron and silver in the mountains, we ought to consider mining enterprises and turn the area into a mining province. Think of the profits, sire!" The Treasurer rubs his hands together in glee.

A) "The settlements need to be invaded and the criminals dealt with appropriately! After that is done, we will begin prospecting and digging for ores."
B) "I will pass the mountains into the hands of Countess Dessa and let her decide how to deal with her old subjects and her new lands."
C) "Send envoys to the mountain settlements. If they won't submit voluntarily, they ought to know what punishment awaits them for such a rebellious behavior."
D) "The settlements need to be invaded and the criminals dealt with appropriately! We won't be starting any mining operations though."
E) "Thugs and vagabonds moving away on their own to live out their miserable lifes in seclusion? That's great! Why did *we* think of that??"
« Last Edit: October 17, 2021, 02:16:29 pm by Haspen »
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SigFlags!
Quote from: Draignean@Spamkingdom+
Truly, we have the most uniquely talented spy network in all existence.
Quote from: mightymushroom@Spamkingdom#
Please tell me the Royal Physician didn't go to the same college as the Spymaster.

Maximum Spin

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM uhhh 5? King Bubba of Rug!
« Reply #168 on: October 13, 2021, 01:09:06 pm »

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Kashyyk

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM uhhh 5? King Bubba of Rug!
« Reply #169 on: October 13, 2021, 01:18:19 pm »

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Rockeater

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM uhhh 5? King Bubba of Rug!
« Reply #170 on: October 13, 2021, 01:33:38 pm »

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Damnit people, this is why I said to keep the truce. Because now everyone's ganging up on the cats.
Also, don't forget to contact your local Eldritch Being(s), so that they can help with our mission to destroy the universe.

Fluffe9911

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM uhhh 5? King Bubba of Rug!
« Reply #171 on: October 13, 2021, 01:35:48 pm »

C Lets be sensible here cant blame some peasants for trying to strike it rich in a time period where opportunities of advancement are little to none.
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Maximum Spin

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM uhhh 5? King Bubba of Rug!
« Reply #172 on: October 13, 2021, 01:48:38 pm »

C Lets be sensible here cant blame some peasants for trying to strike it rich in a time period where opportunities of advancement are little to none.
Of course I can. If they were supposed to advance, they'd be nobles.
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Yellow Pixel

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM uhhh 5? King Bubba of Rug!
« Reply #173 on: October 13, 2021, 02:09:39 pm »

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King Zultan

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM uhhh 5? King Bubba of Rug!
« Reply #174 on: October 14, 2021, 01:27:59 am »

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The Lawyer opens a briefcase. It's full of lemons, the justice fruit only lawyers may touch.
Make sure not to step on any errant blood stains before we find our LIFE EXTINGUSHER.
but anyway, if you'll excuse me, I need to commit sebbaku.
Quote from: Leodanny
Can I have the sword when you’re done?

Haspen

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM uhhh 5? King Bubba of Rug!
« Reply #175 on: October 14, 2021, 08:10:46 am »

aaa
ccc

It's a tie ;v
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SigFlags!
Quote from: Draignean@Spamkingdom+
Truly, we have the most uniquely talented spy network in all existence.
Quote from: mightymushroom@Spamkingdom#
Please tell me the Royal Physician didn't go to the same college as the Spymaster.

Prophet

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM uhhh 5? King Bubba of Rug!
« Reply #176 on: October 16, 2021, 12:42:37 am »

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.... You've doomed us all. Granted. Everyone except for traps are executed. Random sci-fi nonsense is required to be taught in schools.
A cute intersex harem with everyone in love with the androgynous king and smart and useful enough into pushing the kingdom forward.

Bralbaard

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM uhhh 5? King Bubba of Rug!
« Reply #177 on: October 16, 2021, 12:27:59 pm »

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Haspen

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM uhhh 5? King Bubba of Rug!
« Reply #178 on: October 17, 2021, 02:28:47 pm »

You send envoys to the mountain 'rebels', if they can be called that.

803 NWE, Autumn

"Footlings?"

"Yes, your Majesty" The Advisor bows his head. "They've begun popping up from the soil in the northwestern province. These tiny half-foot humans are disturbing the crops, which, so close to the harvest, might damage the food stockpiles of the Kingdom. Their pods are usually burnt out during Spring times, when they can be easily spotted and most seeds are not yet planted."

"How do we deal with this?"

"We purge the soil by burning it."

"Which will destroy the crops just as good as the emerging footlings' will."

"It might be just like that, my liege. The question is whether we believe in luck that the Footling infestation won't destroy too many farmland, or we just burn all the affected crops and those adjacent to them, and buy foodstuffs for affected families for the coming winter." The Advisor bows his head. "The Treasurer have heard of the affair and is already setting aside funds..."

A) "We cannot let fate decide how many crops are going to be destroyed. Burn all the affected fields, and the Treasurer shall repay the hungry families!"
B) "Maybe the infestation isn't that large. We ought to wait and pray that it is so!"
C) "Setting aside funds? Did I order such a thing? No, because peasants' fields are their responsibility. If they've not cared for their fields well enough during Spring, then it's their fault for facing starvation!"
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SigFlags!
Quote from: Draignean@Spamkingdom+
Truly, we have the most uniquely talented spy network in all existence.
Quote from: mightymushroom@Spamkingdom#
Please tell me the Royal Physician didn't go to the same college as the Spymaster.

Yellow Pixel

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM uhhh 5? King Bubba of Rug!
« Reply #179 on: October 17, 2021, 03:17:24 pm »

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