Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Knightwing64]

Hmmmmm.......

Try to gain increased control over the boat.

[Screech9791]

>Plant comically timed explosives on key components.

[The Lupanian]

Locate weapons and scan the horizon for threats.

[King Zultan]

Be a dolphin, and flop around on the deck while making squeaking noises.

[Horizon]

Say "Yar har and avast" while swinging from a rope.

[Ozarck]

Study boat law. That sounds like something that might come in handy.

(2) something something. Keel haul, something something, offshore account.

Hmmmmm.......

Try to gain increased control over the boat.

(5) You can now steer the boat and toot the boat horn. Lower the anchor? I don't know, you have captain privileges, as far as the boat is concerned. Other persons on the boat might dispute this, but the boat thinks you are neat, I guess. It doesn't actuallyu think, mind you, but you know. It cooperates.

>Plant comically timed explosives on key components.

(4) you plant explosives set to "one million" and "I like pie." The one million timer begins counting down in a Donald Duck voice, and the pie one begins declaruing it's love for cereal and answering all questions with "yes."
Three turns until Coast Guard arrives to haul your ass to Coast Jail. That's a thing, right? coast jail?

Locate weapons and scan the horizon for threats.

You look left. T- Pain has an Uzi. You look right. P-Tain has a Zuma. You scan the horizon fro breasts, and discover that the scantily cladd women are definitely packing.

Be a dolphin, and flop around on the deck while making squeaking noises.

(2) The drugs start wearing off and your aquatic mammalian hallucinations fade. You do, at least, flop around on teh deck like a dying sea creature that smells bad.

Say "Yar har and avast" while swinging from a rope.

(3) you manage "Yar Ha, A ... fuck" as you swing into the side of the passenger compartment and fall unceremoniously onto the deck, next to the guy clearly crashing hard from a different kind of trip.

[The_Two_Eternities]

Interrogate the other people on this boat. Keelhaul all among them who admit to having an offshore account (... but first, force them to give me the contents of said account).
"I've read a book called On the Uſe of Boat Legiſlation for Pleaſure and Profit by some guy named Edward Teach, and I'm pretty sure it's legal for me to do this."

[King Zultan]

Gather all the drugs on the ship and eat them so I can ASCEND and take on MY FINAL FORM as the dolphin god intended for me to be!

[Horizon]

Sing a sea shanty!

[Knightwing64]

Become a fish thing and establish dominance over the boat!

[A_Curious_Cat]

Begin drilling holes in the ships hull.

[The Lupanian]

Shoot the guy drilling the holes and the guy planting the explosives. Then set up cover along the sides of the boat to defend against the coast guard.

[Ozarck]

Interrogate the other people on this boat. Keelhaul all among them who admit to having an offshore account (... but first, force them to give me the contents of said account).
"I've read a book called On the Uſe of Boat Legiſlation for Pleaſure and Profit by some guy named Edward Teach, and I'm pretty sure it's legal for me to do this."

(2) Guns are pointed, arguments raised, mexicans stood off. Eventually, and with a lot of side-eye from everyone involved in the almost shoot-out, everyone lowers tehir guns and goes back to sex, drugs, and rickrolls. ((that was a good effort though, with ths old timey 's's and stuff. Though I think teh golden age of piracy was afer the use of those died out? not sure. Either way, well done.))

Gather all the drugs on the ship and eat them so I can ASCEND and take on MY FINAL FORM as the dolphin god intended for me to be!

(6) you eat a lot of drugs and overdose and die, as the god of drugs intended.

Sing a sea shanty!

(1) you end up starting a limerick, which turns int oa sonnet, which, halfway through segues into pure dubstep. This last transition is not fit for human vocals and you blow out your vocal cords, having sung nary a word of the sea, ships, or the lass in every port.

Become a fish thing and establish dominance over the boat!

(5) You become a merman and establish dominance the traditional way - dry humping. you are now the dom, the boat is now the sub. You don appropriate gear, leather, black, and with a whip.

Begin drilling holes in the ships hull.

(2) you whip out a big ol' hand crank drill, look to the left where someone is already ... eww ... drilling the ship, and look to the right where several guns are pointed your way and decide, very wisely, that sinking T-Pain's submarine is probably not the wisest course of action. You lower the drill and hope not to get shot. (You get shot anyway. (3) you are bleeding out on the deck. You can be saved if you or someone else acts THIS ROUND to patch you up. Otherwise you will bleed out and be shoved overboard along with the guy who OD'd.

Shoot the guy drilling the holes and the guy planting the explosives. Then set up cover along the sides of the boat to defend against the coast guard.

(6) You kill the guy drilling holes, but I don't think you were aware of the explosives guy. You re-initiate the mexican standoff that The Two Eternities started in the first action of the round. Now everyone is poitning guns at aeveryone, and the Coast Guard will be here in two turns.

[The_Two_Eternities]

Interrogate the other people on this boat. Keelhaul all among them who admit to having an offshore account (... but first, force them to give me the contents of said account).
"I've read a book called On the Uſe of Boat Legiſlation for Pleaſure and Profit by some guy named Edward Teach, and I'm pretty sure it's legal for me to do this."

(2) Guns are pointed, arguments raised, mexicans stood off. Eventually, and with a lot of side-eye from everyone involved in the almost shoot-out, everyone lowers tehir guns and goes back to sex, drugs, and rickrolls. ((that was a good effort though, with ths old timey 's's and stuff. Though I think teh golden age of piracy was afer the use of those died out? not sure. Either way, well done.))

((According to Google, the Golden Age of Piracy was the time period between 1650 and 1730 or so. Edward Teach, better known as Blackbeard, was a pirate during the late 1710s. According to Wikipedia, use of the long s started to die out somewhere around 1800. I specifically looked up the dates to make sure I got it right. It's little things like that every now and then that are part of the fun for me.))

Join in the mexican standoff. Try to look cool and intimidating without looking like a target.

[Knightwing64]

Start worshipping Cthulhu. I then ask other players to join me in my quest of ocean dominance.