Turn 11Juainos climbs atop his hat before activating the flying salsa function and hovering towards the Doom Mug's location faster than that one famous rat from cartoons..
3You see that the settlement is currently under a major attack from a pack of out of control sewer clowns. Even worse, those they catch join the pack in biting others. Time to go, then.
You hop onto your gloriously massive mariachi hat and fly toward the Doom Mug to a soundtrack of Spanish singing, a guitar, two trumpets, and a whole bunch of violins. It's a fun ride, but it's taking a while to get there without a TARDIS.
Stop the clowns from killing anybody, and try to bring more people under my control.
3, 6Unfortunately, several villagers are killed by the sewer clowns before you can refresh the viruses in the clown's central nervous systems. The clowns still aren't completely under control, but their bites are spreading your infection to whoever they bite. The effected victims now join the horde in spreading your consciousness to others, although you'll need to exert more of your will to assert control.
"Yes a ride sounds nice, I might even be able to get something better than this crossbow that I made, I'm not even sure it works."
Take the ride to the dealership.
1You get in the car and ride with the chupacabra towards Honest Jane's dealership. On the way, he introduces himself as Obrador. As you pull toward the dealership, he starts to talk about the world before the Event.
"You know, one thing I really miss about the Human Age is the organization. They had this incredible system for coordinating their massive populations, always for the common good. The humans even gave a percentage of their money over voluntarily! Course, that's just to hear me tell it."
He chuckles behind the wheel.
"I mean, I've always been a big fan of
The Government."
Go alone to the lands of the Dairy Queen.
4So be it. You ride alone. You quickly leave town before the spreading sewer clown virus can reach you, and run out into the wasteland. After a journey of appropriately ambiguous length, you find yourself on the edge of the Dairy Queen's forest. Twisted trees and mysterious noises provide a forbidding welcome to this place.
"Foolish creatures! You intrude upon the HARDENED MIND of a WARRIOR! PERISH NOW BEFORE GUNTHAR!"
And again GUNTHAR HORNHELM lashes against his fell enemy, now with demented mind and keen-edged blade alike!
6+2Kill and eat the ghouls
3+1Remove my shoes and throw them at the ghouls.
Use pitons and other climbing equipment to reach the top of the tower.
3, 3(Ghouls:Attack Rana)
3 vs 6+1At the tower, Joshua heroically attacks the ghouls by removing his shoes and flinging them into the pack. It has exactly as much effect as you would expect. Rana has a bit more success with her idea of ripping a pair of them open and devouring the spilled intestines as a warning to the others. The ghouls back off for a moment at the display, and Joshua uses the distraction to start climbing the tower.
Meanwhile, GUNTHAR uses the two weapons available to him to attack the horrors, his AXE OF THE GINNUGAGAP and his SERIOUS ISSUES. The colossal scale of his assault actually forces the horrors to retreat for now into 4th dimensional angles that GUNTHAR cannot perceive. Of course, this does leave GUNTHAR to deal with a major problem, in that he no longer has anything to hold him up above the void below him and is now falling.
Ssarscel stops for a moment, and looks his companion dead in the eyes.
“Okay, ssstop. What are you? Becaussse I can sssay quite sssscertainly that theessse were very much empty.”
”I am a completely normal human being,” Adam responded, ”...who may or may not own a guitar crafted in the forge of creation for the express purpose of fighting Thainos...”
Continue on our way.
6After the
miracle mysterious incident with the canteens, Ssarscel stops for a moment, and looks his companion dead in the eyes.
“Okay,
ssstop. What
are you? Becaussse I can sssay
quite sssscertainly that theessse were
very much empty.”
”I am a completely normal human being,” Adam responded,
”...who may or may not own a guitar crafted in the forge of creation for the express purpose of fighting Thainos...”Ssarscel seems unconvinced, but the two continue on their way into the desert.
They successfully become even more lost.
start to stab the clown repeatedly with bones until it dies
1You try to attack a clown. Unfortunately, it smells you coming and whips around to catch your extended bone blade through its palm. The clown honks maniacally and bites you on the wrist. Despite your lack of blood, you struggle to maintain control against the digital virus spreading up your arm.
Move to get a better look at the semi-humanoids, and anything extra to be noticed from the doom mug, anything at all. Once there’s nothing more to be seen, head back to the TARDIS and use the stove I set up there to fry up some lunch. Rashers, sausages, some black and white pudding, a slice of toast, and a poached egg, provided I still have enough food to do that.
1You decide to leave the TARDIS and scout out the corpse of the Doom Mug in person. Before you can find anything of note, a gust of wind blows you off your feet and down a hill. You roll rapidly toward the edge of a precipice. At the last moment, you're able to grab a small dead tree while hanging over the edge. As you cling for your life, one of the figures begins to approach through the blowing dust and traces of snow.