Submitting early because I won't have more time to play and someone else can play in the meantime before the next turn. First come first serve I presume. I set winrar to best and it still gave me 5.4
Save:
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1YUf2QFqu0AY6Poo7n_4ShgMpxPq7gLIw/view?usp=sharingI will only have three entries. One for each character I have who all went on very different adventures. I'll leave a censored TL;DR at the beginning that includes a summary of important things they did. The first one here will also include my museum submission.
TL;DR:
Accidentally unleashed a Chaotic Messenger Hollow Zombie on the world. If you find him please return him dead or alive to Incenseorder castle!
Resurrected the doctor of the Abysses
Resurrected Three kobolds - One of them is a baron now yay!
Recovered Blistered Metal that was used on Arthur's shenanigans and left Many Blistered metal weapons, including an artifact battleaxe, in Razorbridge. Please follow the instructions of the statue inside if you get them:
I resurrected several Warriors of Udir as Hollow Zombies, but for some reason it glitched and they fully resurrected as actual living beings. They and others are part of the Walled Dye now. It was a glitch of some sort and not intentional
Did I intend to re-release an ageless all female species of cyclopean muscle mommies on the civilized world? Absolutely not. Was this a failure? Absolutely not.Submission: One Warrior of Udir Axewoman
Entry One - MaloyIf I had a silver 785 Omon Obin coin for every time I ended up in a prison with no designed exit or entrance...
I'd have two silver 785 Omon Obin coin's. Which isn't a lot,
but it is weird that it has happened twiceLooking up I can see the light of day far far above me. A very narrow shaft of light choked out by the sheer distance between me and it.
Why am I here? Frankly, I don't know. This seems like one of Midor's practical jokes. The death goddess wasn't satisfied cursing me with one of the weakest werebeast forms imaginable, but over the last couple of centuries she has had her followers erect statues everywhere of my being cursed ruining any hope of anonymity. It was so in character for her to try to seal me away. Thankfully, I still had some of that rare nameless power left from my ritual with resurrecting Bralbaard so I could escape easily.
It is well past time I got revenge on that horrid goddess who won't let me just enjoy my immortality in peace! I go due south from this tomb to the abandoned town of Padcalls. Should be abandoned, some of the men I left here got killed by the ceaseless goblin invasions while the others...well. Anyway the goblins can't defeat Lord Juvar, but they still keep trying.
Suddenly I detect movement in the warehouse next to me...
I enter to find three dwarves digging through the abandoned treasures of Padcalls
"Commander Eral?!" I exclaim recognizing the commander of the entire military of Razorbridge and chief military officer of the region
The dwarf almost jumped out of his own skin at the intrusion after digging up a particularly gorgeous ruby "AH! oh my! Lord Craftsroars is that you?! What a joyous occasion! No one has seen you for two decades!" the dwarf swatted an arm at his two noticeably green recruits "You two stand at attention and show proper respect to a lord"
"Firstly, I was gone two decades? Secondly, why are you digging through this town's treasury like some base looter! Look alive man!"
Eral's eyes looked as if they were going to pop out of his head "Looting?! My Lord! this is the most important task of the new millennia!" He looks around conspiratorially "That Juvar fellow in the castle-"
One of the recruits cut in "Lord Juvar, sir"
"yes yes. Lord Juvar. Those goblins are too afraid to do anything about him see-"
The other recruit motioned towards his teeth and used his fingers to indicate fangs and made a hissing sound
"Quiet you! Anyway now, he doesn't ever leave his castle either. Goblins and trolls are just slightly smarter than a mule, lord. But given enough decades even a mule would notice this giant building full of treasure! Why it could fund their war effort for another century! So we gotta protect it!"
I cross my arms nodding my head "uh huh. I see and where are you taking this treasure, exactly?"
"Not sure yet, Lord, but one problem at a time, yes."
I had to consider for a moment. Although this did amount to theft Juvar certainly didn't need it and frankly it would be a hilarious joke on the man. I nodded my head affirmative
"Drop some off at my castle and you're good to go!"
I leave the errant soldiers to their task to visit my old friend Lord Juvar. I visit him two or three times a century, you know. He responds with extreme hostility to my presence, jokes and flattery. All of which brings me great delight!
Today in particular I taunt him for his lack of guile or cleverness
He responds with particular venom "Oh! Speaking of guile how about
we cover your men trying to take
my castle from me!"
"tsk tsk tsk, lord juvar. I did not such thing. Those men acted entirely on their own and for their own benefit. Likely the encroaching horde of trolls made them wish to find safety in a castle" which was true I did not instruct them to rebel only to monitor this immortal guardian of my southern border.
"Also I made this figurine for you! It's my friend Miaralei!"
The vampire grabs the figurine and throws it at me "Get out of my castle!"
I duck out of the way "So rude. Hopefully you'll be in a better mood next time I stop by!"
I continue south to my true target destination: The vault of Cradledmartyrs
The vault was dedicated to Midor, her creations, her resources and her curses upon this world all layered in one stone dung pile. Long pillaged.
I pick my way through the ruins looking for my prize. I find one dead human adventurer with the words "doctor" on his clothing, but the rest obscured. From one adventurer to another I decide to help him and gently pack him into my bag to resurrect elsewhere.
Whoever came through here demonstrated particular animosity towards the inhabitants. Every single one was torn to pieces, butchered and skinned. Unnecessarily thorough, but they missed one. A dead lizard man called a chaotic messenger. This corpse was in poor condition, but workable and could be used. I pack him next to the doctor and leave after claiming some remaining divine weapons and armor from the dead.
On the way back I find some dead kobolds and bring them too. They're the epitome of harmless, as species go, and I have formed a hobby of resurrecting people who aren't dangerous and usually grateful to me.
Finally, we reach Razorbridge. I resurrect the doctor and kobolds first who stand around trying to understand where they are and what happened to them. I ignore any questions until I can finish with my true prize.
The lizard rises to it's feet with a great bellow and cheer. That's a first for me as far as resurrections go:
It continues to scream into the sky ceaselessly
"Excuse me"
It doesn't turn at my voice and cheers jumping from one foot to the other
"Excuse me!!" I shout
It turns towards me without lowering it's volume even slightly
"HEY FURRY FRIEND!"oh gods please no "Excuse me! I resurrected you!"
The lizard let's out an even louder cheer and beats its chest bellowing
"Thank you so much, furry brother! Live free my man!"Why is this happening to me?"Right. well, sister your goddess abandoned you and I saved you so-"
The creature shrieked again
"What did you say, furry friend?! You gotta speak up!"I know now why every single one was brutally dismembered and no longer condemn the one who did so."Your goddess abandoned you! Help! Me! Get! Revenge!"
"No!"What!?"What?!"
"I ride my own waves, little bro and nobody elses! You have fun with that though!" The creature walked away cheering even louder than at the start
"Get back here! I resurrected you! You owe me! Stop ignoring me, you stupid lizard!" I scream at the top of my lungs into the sky
When I calm and turn the kobolds and doctor have also left now.
Why is this happening to me?!I go back home to Incenseorder to calm down although it doesn't help much. Goblins moved into my city thinking that I am the new host of demon that was in the ear. They had filled a warehouse with cheap scavenged weapons and armor and were just waiting for the chance to ask me for permission to raid.
The bright red-eyed recruits had enthusiasm at least, but I know from history that every time someone like me gets those kind of aspirations in their head they end up miserably dead, but I do have an idea.
"Go to the mountains far to the south and west. Bring me back 100 eagles to prove yourselves!" That should buy me a couple of years.
Realizing I shouldn't give up on my aspirations so easily I journey back to the vault. Surely, with nowhere else to go in the world, the chaotic messenger went back to it's home.
Only it didn't. I enter to find the doctor at the entrance. For some reason he wanted to return and to stay at the place of his gruesome death. He waved at me as I entered
"Look, I don't want to know why you came back here. Just tell me if the lizard is here"
The doctor shakes his head to signal "No"
"Huh?! He didn't come back!? Why not?! Where else could he have gone?!"
The doctor simply shrugs his shoulders.
Moments before I give into righteous rage and throw something I force myself to take a deep breath. Breathe in. Breathe out. It's okay. You're immortal, successful and have many friends. Midor is a loser and that messenger will probably get thrown into magma somewhere.
"Okay new plan. New vault" I wave at the doctor as I leave him.
I arrive at the only other vault in the world that is on the exact opposite side of the world from my home. Again all the inhabitants are dead, but these must not have been as insufferable as the killer did not rend them limb from limb. The new inhabitants are goblins and gremlins. They're shocked by my bold entry, but I don't even greet them. Frankly, I am completely done with this adventure already.
I grab several corpses and depart for another week of walking without sleep to Razorbridge.
The good news is that I have enough corpses for one of my experiments: As an undead bodily functions worked optionally. One could drink alcohol and engage the digestive system and enjoy the effects of alcohol on self. Or never drink at all. The system went into stasis until needed for use.
So experiment: Can the reproductive system of two undead be engaged to produce living offspring and therefore revive a dead species?
I lay the corpses on a platform, carefully avoiding Miara and Arthur who are still mad at me for the whole unleashing a demon on the world thing.
I wave my hand and all mangled rotted corpses rise. "Good good. Okay now you are all dearly welcome for your resurrection. your creator has abandoned you and I have new glorious purpose for you and-"
Something strange began to happen.
The hollow zombies began to properly regenerate the entirety of their bodies. Within moments they were no longer undead but truly living beings.
And they were all naked cyclops women!
This left me quite flustered to witness. One of the naked women, unaware or uncaring for her state, turned to me "We have returned to fight the eternal war"
I am speechless still quite distracted by the sight before me
"Lead us to where we may fight"
I snap out of it "Oh. uh. Yes. Stay here actually. This place sees traffic coming and going from several different wars. Just uh stay here and...do that. Are there males in your race?"
She makes a strange expression "Do you think us unable to fight, wolf man? There are no men in our people nor do we need any!"
"I absolutely don't think that and I think that is just great. So, just stay here and...be fruitful and multiply I guess"
I need another two decade vacation...
I leave the rest of my revenge against Midor into the hands of my best friend's son: Arandil.
(Next Entry to come)
Commander Eral retired early to a private beach he purchased with his findings.
There's more of the cyclops now by the way.