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I don't care.

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I don't care.

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Total Members Voted: 0

Voting closed: January 04, 2021, 02:28:47 am

[19_EgarAlnis]

"I...I know this is an awful time -- but the only times I see you now are when you're laying in a hospital bed. Or when you die in my dreams." Emma continues, stuttering, tears starting to drip down her cheeks. "I tried to be there for you. I tried so hard to be faithful and dutiful and -everything-. Especially after all that's happened -- especially after all the times you saved me."

"But I -- we can't build a relationship on that. I want us to have a future. I want us to be happy -- but how much pain do I have to trade now for that future? How much misery? How many times do I have to see you crawling back from god knows what battle, covered in your own blood? How many times do I have to lay awake at night, watching you cry or scream or burn the bed?"

You say nothing, even as tears sting your eyes.

"I'm being selfish. I know." Emma admits with a sniffle, rubbing at her face, but she continues to cry. Her eyes becoming puffy and red, especially because she keeps palming at them. "When I stopped seeing you every day when I stopped visiting you -- my dreams stopped. I started dreaming of other things again. I started being able to sleep again."

"I understand if you never want to see me again, if you want me to go, if you want to get angry with me -- I'll figure something out. But...I can't let myself be so close to you. Not now."

[ZBridges]

I will leave the words to someone else, but there's certainly no need to be angry with her. We do need her cooperation as one of the few Empyreals on this planet.

[Superdorf]

Phoebe... you've one last possibility. A choice I cannot make for you.
You could offer to take Emma-- board Cephie's dropship-- flee into the void. Flee all of this. Safety on some other world.

It would be an-- an abandonment
but if that is your choice, we will not hold it against you
and if not-- or if she will not-- then there is only left to say
"I understand"
"I love you"
"I'm sorry"

and perhaps after the war... things will be different
I don't know
I don't know

[ZBridges]

I can only imagine the pain you must be feeling right now, Phoebe, but I would urge you to stay true to your goals. Don't throw this planet away for a chance at reconciliation.

Life is suffering, dear. It's part of the human condition, and there's no changing that.

[Eschar]

I, too, will leave words to another.

I am torn.

There is indeed a choice, to be with Emma and abandon this planet, but shall we leave thousands of people bereft of their present keeper? There are generals, yes, soldiers, Crusaders, but they may not be able to defend the people. The Plague is an excellent tactician, as we saw with the Line.

Emma is not, as she said, selfish. But that would be.

But now is not the time for my strategizing.

For now, listen to her. I do not know in full the pain you are feeling, I was... too distrustful for that, but do not let it provoke you to any hasty interjections.

Wait.

Listen.

Do not be what she fears - do not become angry with her, or refuse to ever see her again, as she said.

And, yes, maybe things can change after the war.

That is all I can say.

[19_EgarAlnis]

I have been using the wrong word this entire time -- reagent instead of regent.


[1]There is no peace in the Void. War will follow me everywhere I go. I am of blood and ash. This I know.

You do not say that to Emma, you do not say what you are truly thinking. Instead, with a strain of muscles better left unstrained, you rise from your wheelchair. Words have always failed you, and now is no different. With a few shaky steps, you approach her -- she flinches, afraid. Perhaps she thought you would be wrathful, or angry.

You wrap her in a tight hug. She cries, and you stand like a stone. Unaffected on the outside as your heart shatters. You give her a peck on the forehead -- and she gives you a final, loving kiss. It lingers. And then you part, reclaiming your seat and slumping down with a pained sigh.

Emma winces, but says nothing.

Time passes as the two of you compose yourselves in that silence, until Emma speaks again. This time, the two of you turn to politics.

"The People view me as your consort still -- I have no intention of going against that narrative. I still wish to serve as your regent and Communications Minister. I think- I think we can still be professional with this."

[Naturegirl1999]

professionalism s important. Narrative is important. Irrespective of actual circumstance, we must still be professional.
Do we tell her about Iyal?

[Superdorf]

I--
...
...I'm sorry, φοῖνιξ. I tried to give you the quiet life-- the happy life. I really did.

"The Thorntons. They are here? Safe?"

[19_EgarAlnis]

"Of course. I wouldn't have any other way." You state with a weak smile, before you ask, calmly, "Did you successfully evacuate your Family?"

Emma nods, "We got back just in time to see you get hauled out of the hovercraft. It was hard to see the old house go, but considering the circumstances, it was probably for the better."

"What do you mean?"

"Oh..." Emma hesitates, rubbing at her eyes, composing herself. "We detonated the Thornton reactors. Our villa has never fallen to enemy control, and that won't change, even if all of our lands lay abandoned."

[Eschar]

I--
...
...I'm sorry, φοῖνιξ. I tried to give you the quiet life-- the happy life. I really did.

I'm not going to say "I told you so," but it seems Phoenix has no taste for abandonment.

Perhaps, perhaps, I should have approved of your plan to give up this world for Emma, and I cannot shut out that thought... but it also reminds me of the people Phoenix would be leaving without an [Archangel] who promised to protect them.

You, fellow advisor, seem to be driven by loyalty. I am too - loyalty and caution are the highest values I learned from my short life... lessons driven home by its untimely end. But we are tied to this planet as well as Emma, for these people trust us. We must not betray that trust. For we are loyal.

[Naturegirl1999]

our goal is to purge the plague from this planet, to protect the people. Leaving will not do anything except give the plague another planet. Speakibg of the plague, we need to finish off the Leciathan before it heals, and destroy the plague buildings. We of course need to heal first. Cephie asked for a break back at the hospital. When we are in the behavior cubes, and when we get out, we need to give her a break. Emma might need a break too. I think we should tell Emma about Cephie

[Superdorf]

I'm not going to say "I told you so," but it seems Phoenix has no taste for abandonment.

It was a choice, youngling. It was not my choice to make. Not my place to condemn. The thing had to be offered.

...

...there is one last question I must ask. It is not a pleasant question.

If in truth, φοῖνιξ, we perish on the battlefield one day-- if the Crusaders bring us home to Stormmont, a corpse-- do we wish for Emma to take up our Essence? The full strength of our will?

[Eschar]

I too wish to know Phoenix's thoughts on that subject.

And my fellow advisors' thoughts on the Woman of Nature's question: shall we tell Emma about Iyal? I for one see no reason not to.

[Superdorf]

What's to tell?

[19_EgarAlnis]

I don't know. We will have time to think, when we are dead. It is difficult to retrieve essence, dust, without unanimous consent. But would you have her take it up? With my fractured mind meeting with Alphira and the Interface again? Do we wish to shoulder her with our responsibilities like that? As a cadet, with the right words and actions, she can live a life of peace, even in the Void. No one will have to know her as a daughter of Sol.

"So, you realized that was Iyal?"

"Yes. She has all the markers of an Empyreal, and I can feel her will when she isn't hiding it." Emma nods, gently.

"Her real name is Cephiela of Lavoisier. She helped knit my chest back together."

"Cheap price to repay her betrayal." Emma snarks, but then sighs. "Sorry. I should trust your trust, I suppose."

"[She's bound by oath in High Empyrean. She will do me no harm until her master arrives and orders it so.]"

Emma looks thoughtful, staring at you in silence. She gives a tight nod.

"I was hoping you would approve a trip to the Outlands -- so that we may recover her voidcraft."

[16]"Only if you consent to a full escort. They'll be ordered to withdraw you immediately if anything -- and I mean anything, could possibly harm you." Emma compromises, and she catches your gaze, offering gently, "You mean more to these people than you realize." She gives a pause, before continuing, "When you get back, you'll have to make a speech addressing the rumors about your death. We cannot show you in a wheelchair, so you'll have to stand. I'll probably hang off your arm to give you some support." Emma doesn't look pleased at the notion, so fresh after her own announcement.