I'm something of a semi-noob. I've orbited around the game for years, mainly listening to other people's stories, but occasionally fire up a fort every now and then. My forts never last long enough to get attacked by anything and I think I've only hit metal once because I just keep losing interest in playing due to frustration with the dwarves themselves or vital mechanics that I only relearn after its too late.
The specific vital mechanic I'm talking about is stairs. Why are there three kinds of stairs? Upstairs seem non-functional if I don't immediately revisit the wiki, downstairs exist solely for the purpose of getting my mining Dwarves stuck in a ditch for the next 15 minutes while I figure out why I can't use the mining fix the stairs and need the builders to create up/downstairs. I have never touched ramps because I don't feel like learning what feels like a redundant mechanic when I could just make a much easier to create a staircase. As long as I remember that up/downstairs won't get my dwarves stuck, I never touch "Up" or "Down" stairs again because they're both essentially newb traps.
Now, maybe I'm being a little harsh on the stairs, but that's because I'm being given the choice of learning how virtual stairs work or learning why Dwarves aren't doing the thing I assigned them to do. That second one's not really a problem for me since I'll look it up and get an answer pretty fast, but new Steam users who don't know the game's reputation are probably going to put in as much work figuring out their Dwarves as I have learning about ramps.
Specifically: Why won't Dwarves do this job? The game doesn't tell you that they need to be assigned to it (And I tend to just use Dwarf Therapist once I realize because in-game I can't assign Dwarves to do the thing until I do another 3rd party search).
Why is my Dwarf stuck 2 Z-levels up a tree? They'll climb up but refuse to climb down unless I build a set of stairs for them. I get that they're running away from A wild bird danger, but this is the dumbest way for them to get away from a threat if they have no intention of climbing down without a rescue. It'd be funny or even cute if they would just climb down on their own (With the risk of injury/death based on their climbing skill) but as is it's just annoying to deal with.
Which reminds me, at the same time 2 dwarves and a cat were stuck up a tree, 1 dwarf and a cat was stuck in hole I was digging to for a little project (Mountain biome, wanted to mitigate Miasma by putting a hole above the butcher's shop, ran into an aquifer and had to give up on that spot). If I was a really new player, I'd have let them all rot because they'll climb a tree and let themselves die there, but they won't climb out of a hole even if there's no other way out.
I did figure it out. Maybe if I gave them more time, they'd have gotten out of the tree/hole on their own. But with a new player mindset, how long should they be expected to wait for their Dwarves to get themselves out of a situation like this on their own?
Lastly, the military's everything. I've never touched it because I never understand what I'm supposed to be looking at, might as well just turtle and only open up for caravans.
Now, aside from the problems on the noob end, for me personally the game just seems to be getting increasingly boring. There's no real reason to keep pushing through because a late-game fortress sounds like it's either FPS death or tirelessly trying to keep your dwarves sane. Personally, I got interested in the game because of the !FUN!. Dwarven Daycare (Impossible and useless now); Breeding War Animals (The things are more likely to panic during an invasion than attack from the videos I've seen); Designing Grand Halls (Useless, the dumb Dwarves won't go near each other to socialize unless you force them into a narrow space); Grand Fighting Arenas (At least this one was never really possible since Dwarves can't tell the difference between an actual threat and a hostile captive that can't get to them).
What I'm getting at here is that the game is becoming increasingly restrictive with what you can and can't do, because Dwarves don't like things that are peacefully grandiose in scale or anything resembling violence. You build a compact space, you babysit every individual's sanity, and maybe build a cool zoo; that seems to be the destiny of every Dwarf Fortress that doesn't face FPS death because anything less will cause a cancer of red arrows.
But maybe I don't know what I'm talking about for late-game, I've only reached midgame once before getting bored and tapping out. Everything just feels like it's becoming more restrictive because Dwarves can't take care of their own mental health, and they can't tolerate any amount of violence without extreme desensitization beforehand.
Anyway, I don't want to sound like I'm just complaining, the game's deeper systems are partly why I keep coming back. It's just that the Dwarves themselves are so, so god damn stupid. Add their stupidity to the stress system and their inability to de-stress on their own, it just becomes hard to find the fun part if you aren't well versed in the game's mechanics enough to know what you can and can't with your Dwarves so you can at least work on building projects.