(Sorry about not posting this yesterday, I felt like shit and didn't really work on it.)
Everyone that died after the Earth was joined with the FUNKIVERSE has come back to life.November 1, 2:30 PMIts sunny.Its cloudy.The town the game started in has been destroyed.All animal life on Earth has evolved into bigger, stronger, and FUNKIER versions of themselves, and they also hate all humans and pumpkin zombies and want to kill them.All the plants on Earth evolved to accommodate the newly evolved animals.An evil sorceress is doing evil stuff.The Earth has become an extension of the FUNKIVERSE.Avetruetotheimperator didn't post for the fourth time so random action.Yoink didn't post for the second time so random action.Continue learning
(5) This time the Wizard teaches you some more spells, a shield spell, detect magic, a spell that detects traps, magic mapping, and a spell that allows you to resist magic based attacks.
Keep exploring the animal city.
(5) As you wander you see that its a fairly normal large city with its large office buildings and apartment towers, you also see that all the citizens here are animals some normal and others mutated, but other than that everything seems normal for what it is, also the animals talk and can do the same things as humans I think I forgot to mention that.
Have my collaborators send me intel from the Funkist leadership. At the same time, have them grow the support of the masses.
Sponsor anti-Funkist Guerrilla groups in the Holy African Union, while using propoganda showcasing their inhumane warfare methods to make them lose the support of the people.
Send my armies to Africa and proceed the warfare, but only against the Funkist. We won't attack the civilians.
Send a telepathic message to CABL, and say the next..
"Hey, dude, like, I know that we are having a war, but like, I have an empire to rule, and you have a religion to establish. So what about this, I make the Holy African Union a protectorate of the Imperium, and you and your religious buddies establish there. In exchange, you will under the protection of the Empire, as long as the religion stays inside the continent of Africa.
The alternative is that you face me like a PUNK, and instead of Random Soldiers killing each other, widowing women and orphaning children, you and I fight each other to solve our countries differences.
Meanwhile send another telepathic message to WyrdByrd.
"Hey, what would say if I offer you the chance to deal with CABL and take over the Funkist Church? Wouldn't you like reuniting the FUNKIST Church?
Also, began training in the art of UNO. One doesn't know when it could be necessary.
(Collaborators finding intel = 2) They try to find intel, but something apparently happened to the leadership and the intel went with them.
(Collaborators growing support = 5) They do however manage to gather even more support for your cause.
(Sponsoring anti-Funkist guerrilla groups = 4) It doesn't take much to get the anti-Funkist guerrilla groups into Africa and get them setup.
(How do the Funkists react = 6) They react quickly when they find out about the anti-Funkist guerrillas, and they manage to catch a few unaware and kill them, but the rest of the guerrillas attack back and kill off several of the attacking Funkists.
(Using propaganda to hurt the Funkists = 6) You start sending out propaganda about the inhuman warfare methods used by the Funkists, but it doesn't seem to have done anything to hurt the Funkists any, maybe its do to everyone being jaded by the world ending.
(How do the Funkists react = 5) They spread their own anti-Imperium propaganda all around the Holy Africa Union about all the things the Imperium has done to against the Funkist religion.
(Sending armies to Africa to attack the Funkists = 4) You send your armies further into Africa to attack some of the Funkist settlements, where they kill off several, but they aren't without losses.
(How do the Funkists react = 6) They fight back against the Imperium army, and while they manage to kill off some of the troops they loose just as many of their own people.
(Sending the message to CABL = 6) You send your message to CABL and you quickly receive
"Eat ass; I know you're planning to kill me, anyway." as a response.
(Sending a message to WyrdByrd = 2) You then send WyrdByrd the message, but you get no response so your not sure if he got it or not.
(Getting training in the art of UNO = 4) You then spend several minutes looking over manuals and books related to the game, and in the end you feel that you have an advantage over others when it comes to playing the card game called UNO.
You get reports from France of a few suicide bombers getting captured in restricted areas when their vests fail to go off, then you get reports that several power plants and factories have been destroyed or damaged by unknown explosions, you also receive reports that some of your soldiers that died have come back to life.
Move the city towards the space-Trace center is time to sell loot
(5) Using the various engines and thrusters around the space city you pilot it towards the space trade place and after several manuvers you get close enough to it to do some trading.
To God Emperor Kakaluncha: "Eat ass; I know you're planning to kill me, anyway."
Holy African Union: Import a "refugee" wave into France, which will do a bunch of serial suicide bombing, with power plants and major infrastructure being main priority.
Also HAU: Use every dirty tactic in our belt to hold off the Imperium. Civilian meat shields; fake surrenders; scorched earth tactics; chemical weaponry. Everything to hold them off.
As for myself, consume the minds of my enlightened disciples. I have no time finding traitors among them, so let's consume their energy instead.
Use the said energy to transform myself into an Avatar of FUNK.
(You sending your own message = 6) You quickly send a message back to that guy.
(Sending "refugees" to France = 5) You have a small contingent of "refugees" head out of the Holy Union and into France, they've all be taught how to make explosives in order to reduce the chances that their motives get found out.
(The "refugees" suicide bombing infrastructure = 6) After a bit of work gathering materials and rigging the bombs they set out to destroy some of the infrastructure, but as they go to their targets several of them have their vests malfunction and get captured in restricted areas, and the rest of them get to their targets unhindered and blow up or damage several power plants and factories around France.
(HAU using dirty tactics on Imperium troops = 6) Your troops prepare to adapt to the new tactics, but the program isn't without issues such as several troops get killed in an accident involving the chemical weapons.
(Consuming the minds of your enlightened followers = 5) Your enlightened followers willingly sacrifice themselves in order to further the cause, and upon the sacrifice you consume their minds.
(Transforming into an Avatar of FUNK = 6) You start the ritual using the special dances and the energy from the sacrificed followers to turn your self into The Avatar of FUNK.
Your people discover a anti-Funkist guerrilla group and attacked them but only killed a few of them, and the Imperium launched some propaganda to try to weaken the cause but everyone ignored it, then the Funkists released their own anti-Imperium propaganda around Africa, then the Imperium army attacked but they were held back but not without losses, you suddenly get news that some of your dead troops cam back to life, but the followers that were sacrificed have stayed dead.
...
Fix them and go find the time machine.
store the mutation energy for later use.
(Fixing the dead animals = 5) Using your powers you bring all the animals that died back to life.
(Finding the time machine = 4) It takes a bit to dig through all the rubble but you eventually find whats left of the basement the time machine is in.
(Fixing the time machine = 4) It takes a bit for you to figure out whats damaged on it, but when you do figure it out it turns out to be an easy fix so you fix it.
(Storing the mutation energy = 2+2 For magic) Using your powers and a large bottle you gather and store all of the mutative energy.
NOT MY CATS! We need more manpower! Get my cats to start reproducing and summon more cats in.
(Cats reproducing = 5) They quickly start making the sex in order to create more cats, and several end up pregnant, but it'll be a bit before the kittens are born.
(Summoning more cats = 2) You can't seem to focus well enough to summon more cats.
You find out that the cats that died earlier have come back to life and are back to their normal selves.
Raise them FUNKY dead
(3+1 For book) Using the power of FUNK and the information from the book you start to raise the dead on Earth, but you only manage to raise the people that died after you combined the Earth with the FUNKIVERSE.
GET THE CREATURE TO JOIN ME, THEN LETS LOOK AROUND THE HOSPITAL FOR ANYTHING USEFUL.
(Getting the creature to join = 6) He is very happy that you let him come with you, as he thinks its better to stick together.
(You looking for useful stuff = 5) After some searching you find a fist aid kit, and a handgun that was in a desk drawer.
(Creature looking for useful stuff = 3) The creature only manages to find a few rolls of bandages.
Time to build a sand castle.
(5) You successfully build a rather large sand castle, you feel rather proud of this accomplishment.
NPC STUFFLets get thing back to normal here and start planting crops and fishing.
(Planting crops = 2) Turns out its to cold to plant right now.
(Fishing = 5) Your people have a lot of luck with the fishing.
Meditate a little longer.
(5) All of your people have visions of spirit animals, and past lives, so they all learn a great deal of lessons.
Enslave some more of the mutant animals, while the demons go out looking for any magical items.
(Enslaving more mutant animals = 1+2 For magic) You have some trouble enslaving the animals and you only get a few.
(Demons looking for magic items = 5) They bring back a stack of magical tomes they apparently found in a basement.
Keep trying to fix the commune.
(1) They damage some stuff partying.
(3) They only fix a few things.
Kill all humans and destroy all signs of civilization.
(North America = 4) They go around destroying a bunch of stuff.
(North America = 3) They break a few things here and there.
Places in space:-
Percent of Ziizo's Animal City destroyed: 0%-
Percent of The Canadian kitten's Moon DISCO BALL Base destroyed: 0%Percent of America destroyed: 47.35%-
Percent of Dustan Hache's fief destroyed: 0%-
Percent of Outsider's monastery destroyed: 0%-
Percent of Evil sorceress's fortress destroyed: 0%-
Percent of Spacenoid base destroyed: 0%Percent of Canada Earth destroyed 46.89%-
Percent of Pumpkin Hippy commune destroyed 28.32%Yoink
Health: FINE / flaming pants
Inventory: loaded shotgun, a few lighters, some rolling paper, chips, candy, soda, glass bottles of beer, different kinds of chips, big ass sword, sword surfing skills, beer, a creature that's a follower, first aid kit, handgun, a few rolls of bandages
Kakaluncha / clothing fit for the Emperor of Mankind they inspire loyalty / The Emperor of Mankind / telepathic / telekinetic / really good at UNO
Health: FINE
Inventory: a bowl, two animated trees, Ninja Elvis costume, The Flying Guillotine, manifesto about the Cult to the Supreme Being, air plane, blood pilot, Maximilien Robespierre's ghost, Napoleon Bonaparte's ghost, knows everything about coups, knows about different propaganda, laptop, Leon Trotsky's ghost, Vladimir Lenin's ghost, know everything about revolutions, 34 ghostly Russian troops, Robespierre costume, a bunch of candy, 100 ghosts in the afterlife, some radiation as an ally, some mecha parts, more radiation friends, Comms that allow communication with North America, a bunch hyper evolved animal slaves loyal to you, several more ghost troops, knowledge on how to bring the dead back from the dead, even more mutant animals loyal to you, several ships, plan for indoctrination of children, three spaceships capable of flying through hyperspace, a several collaborationist in the Funkist Church, a few small anti-Funkist guerrilla groups
France: United, 334,890 follows, no radiation, one power plant, super efficient economy, the most stable, efficient, and self sustaining version of France EVER, global superpower, great again, 132,743 settled refuges North America, several of the factories and power plants are destroyed or damaged
Afterlife: a French puppet state, lead by distinguished puppers
Europe: back to what it was before the apocalypse, 2,465,567 followers
The Middle East: Rebuilt, 1,324,567 followers
Dustan Hache / knight / blessed with strength
Health: FINE
Inventory: slightly damaged Plate armour, shield, sword, one small candy, bowl of candy, two bags of candy, even more candy, one factories worth of candy, lots of fish
Fiefdom: walls, lots of food, crops, Good moral, hunting party, water snake with arms that takes care of the crops, militia ready to fight
ziizo / like new again ULTRA-MEGA-ZORD made from ten zords and has nine animal pilots
Health: FINE
Inventory: road atlas, lime green hatchback with full tank of gas slightly damaged, large pipe, music CD, all kinds of cooking tools, mutant deer thing has the legendary laser gun, very big army of animals, zord manual, two space pirate ships, big laser, decent amount of loot, some more loot, all manner of electrical components, several large weapons, a few still usable computer systems, navigational equipment, lots of raw materials, other stuff
Animal city: traps, trenches all around, razor wire, landmines, fortified walls and positions, more mounted machine guns, improved to with stand being space, space worthy, in space, space port of pirates
Naturegirl1999 / doesn't have the power to switch bodies / has telekinesis / knows the basics of FUNKY magic
Health: DAMAGED
Inventory: three followers
Spells: Light, Shield, Detect magic, Detects traps, Magic mapping, Resist magic
CABL / second prophet of FUNK / Avatar of FUNK
Health: FINE
Inventory: incredibly close to the true wisdom of the FUNK
The Holy African Union: Better than what it was before the war, 3,393,809 Funkist followers, anti-Imperium propaganda, guerrilla fighters, dirty tactics
ANGRY_DEMON_NOISES / Is Angry Halloween Kaiju / soul magic / ULTRA OVERDEITY OF HALLOWEEN / combined with Samhain and Gates of Hell haunted house / blessing of strong bones and spookiness
Health: SLIGHT DAMAGE
Inventory: 4000 page waiver that has to be signed to get into the haunted house if you sign it or read it you lose your soul, one soul, posters advertising the GATES OF HELL HAUNTED HOUSE, Smoke Mirrors's ankles, thirty souls, a bunch of demons, all of Earth's gumball machines, necronomicon, bigger suit case
The Canadian kitten / ability to fly / god powers / mind slightly crushed crushed / explosion proof / higher powered god than you were before
Health: FINE
Inventory: can opener, some bottles of water, 9mm handgun, bike, first aid kit with aspirin a few bandages and a first aid pamphlet, knife, shotgun, rifle, .44 magnum revolver, anti-tank rifle, 584 cat army with extra sharp claws some of them are pregnant, a box of candy, several spaceships
Moon DISCO BALL base: several buildings, a few defensive positions
Enemy post / employee of the month
Health: FINE
Inventory: rock, has a job in a "office" organizing files and papers regarding new species and issues faced by the new world, art supplies, masterpiece painting of the fighting in the town
Smoke Mirrors / Angelo and Diablo / couldn't lose your soul even if you wanted to / one ankle / angel magic / OVERDEITY OF ALL HOLIDAYS / on fire
Health: A LOT MORE DAMAGED / broken nose
Inventory: six million souls, time machine, bottle of secrete stuff
Avetruetotheimperator / SPACE GUY / vauge space psychic powers
Health: FINE
Inventory: massive pile of candy, badly damaged small spaceship
Medium sized fortress on the planet:
Outsider / ascetic monk
Health: MORE DAMAGE
Inventory: 12 enlightened, 36 injured enlightened people, a bunch of tools, some of building materials, 277,997,762 enlightened pumpkin zombies
Monastery: farm, wall, lots of rooms
WyrdByrd / FUNK-Master / increases FUNKability / ONE WITH THE FUNK / CREATURE OF PURE FUNK
Health: FINE
Inventory: 15 FUNKY disciples, 23 FUNKY creatures, LAVA LAMP, DISCO BALL, STEREO, 36 people enlightened about the FUNK
FUNKY Church: Filled with FUNKY stuff, "Holy FUNK book", split between two parties, leads the half of the FUNKY Church called FUNKODOXES, 12 plant creatures, foundation for a magical realm
Evil sorceress
Health: FINE
Inventory: 385 demons, 883 mutated animals, stack of magical tomes
Former gas station now a proper fortress: high walls, towers, a moat, in the middle of nowhere
The country of Oman has been destroyed.
If you wear a costume you become whatever the costume depicts.
The more candy you have the more powerful you become.
There's a massive army of animals.
The apocalypse happened.
Ceres has been destroyed.
Jupiter has been destroyed.
Super Hell has been destroyed.
The Unholy Pail has been killed.
VY Canis Majoris has been destroyed.
There's a demon bloodsports dimension.
The city with animals has traps.
The moon is much bigger.
Canada has be magically renamed to Earth.
The entire Earth has been covered with a wave of FUNK.
The moon is a DISCO BALL.
The FUNKY Church is a thing, and its divided, Half follows CABL and the other half follows WyrdByrd.
Large space station filled with aliens that are willing to buy your ill-gotten goods.
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Topic: Minimalist Halloween thing 2: Revenge of the Electric Boogaloo: Its dead Jim. (Read 103026 times)