A giant tree has started attacking the Spacenoid mothership.Another billion of the pumpkin zombies are dead!November 1, 9:30 AMIts sunny.The sky is clear.A giant pumpkin zombie army two billion strong as appeared and is destroying everything that isn't Canada then adding it to Canada, all of them have weapons now and they are also immune to brain alteration.The town the game started in has been lifted lifted into space, but people still in the town don't have to worry about air as it's in a bubble of breathable air.An evil sorceress is doing evil stuff.Everything on Earth and the town is washed in a wave of FUNKINESS.Kakaluncha didn't post for the sixth time so random action.Smoke Mirrors didn't post for the third time so random action.Avetruetotheimperator didn't post for the third time so random action.Plan B, bombard alien spaceships with acidic sacs, making holes in the hull.
Make several "transport" sacs to bombard the spaceships with, so that the creatures inside enter the ships through the holes.
One transport sac can hold 10 Demonic Foliage.
(Bombarding alien ship with acidic sacs = 5) You quickly begin throwing your acidic sacs at the alien mothership.
(Making holes in the hull = 6) Your sacs fly forth and strike the ship melting several large holes in the hull, but some of the acid splashes back and hits you.
(Do the aliens react = 4) The alien mothership starts firing lasers at the town destroying some of the buildings you just got rebuilt.
(Making transport sacs = 6) You make several transport sacs, some of which immediately fall apart.
(Bombarding alien ship with transport sacs = 3) You launch a dozen of the sacs at the ship, some of them get shot down, others fall apart in flight, only three make it to the ship.
(How much damage do they do inside the ship = 4) The thirty of them do some damage to the rooms they manage to get into.
(How do aliens react to being boarded = 1) It turns out they can't fire lasers at your troops sense they're inside, and all of the enemy troops that were close are dead.
Try once again to take a walk around the city.
(5) You finally leave your house and wander around the town and watch the lasers rain from the sky and destroy several building, but other than that the walk was uneventful other than the fact that there aren't any humans around just a bunch of flaming guys and plant creatures.
Make TNT go boom boom and use godly bs powers to magically restore my mind
(TNT going boom = 4) You immediately detonate the TNT which blows one of the mecha's legs off and badly damages the other.
(Using god BS to fix brain = 3) You use your godly BS to fix your brain, but only manage to fix some of the damage.
Everyone goes to build the space-pirate ships
(Building space-pirate ships = 6) They start building but during the construction some crucial parts get damaged and they don't get it repaired in time.
(Building space-pirate ships = 5) It doesn't take that long for them to build a medium sized ship.
Alright the coast is clear, probably Head inside the tower and look for the wizard
(5) Your group quickly runs into the tower, where you find lots of books and other magical stuff, then suddenly you hear someone coming down the stairs and you see the DISCO WIZARD he demands to know why you killed his DISCO zombies and broke into his house.
Have a talk with the tree, then put it to the FUNKY test.
(Talking to the tree = 1) You try to get to the tree but a house next to you explodes and you get trapped under some rubble.
I LIKE HOW CABL BANISHED ME TO DEMON BLOODSPORTS DIMENSION BUT IS ACTUALLY P. MUCH PARADISE
ALSO IS A RELIEF THAT GLADIATOR DEMONS DOING SO VOLUNTARILY. CONSCIENCE DODGED BULLET THERE
WALK BACK TO PARTY, PASS JOINT AROUND MY NEW FRIENDS IF THEY WISH TO PARTAKE
THEN CONTINUE SMOKING AND DRINKING AND SEE IF THE COMMERCIAL'S OVER YET. OTHERWISE, WATCH WHATEVER STRANGE HELL COMMERCIALS THEY HAVE IN THIS REALM
(Getting back to the party = 4) It doesn't take long to get back to your where the party is.
(Passing the joint = 2) You would pass the joint around but you smoked it all while you walked.
(Continuing to smoke and drink = 3) You continue to drink, but not smoke as you already smoked the joint.
(Are the commercials over = 4) Its back to the show when you get there, and the guy you liked is still alive.
(What kind of commercials are there = 2) Turns out you missed the commercials while you were gone.
Have the troops continue to expand the planet side base, and try to repair the damage done to my mind and kick that create away.
(Troops expanding the planet side base = 5) Your troops continue to expand the base, and now its a medium sizes fortress.
(Kicking the create = 2) You go to kick the create but you miss and it explodes blowing off one of the mecha's legs and badly damaging the other.
(Repairing brain = 5) You manage to repair your mind completely.
Your commander calls you on the radio and says something in the town is attacking the mothership.
Keep aiding in the fight by killing the pumpkin zombies.
(2+2 For magical powers) Using your powerful magics you destroy large amounts if the incoming pumpkin zombie hoard.
Continue to try to establish communications with North America.
(3) Turns out reestablishing long distance comms is incredibly hard and your only manage to get a big radio tower built.
NPC STUFFEverybody keep defending the fief from the pumpkin zombies, and I will continue to use my holy powers to kill the pumpkin zombies.
(You using holy magic to kill = 6) While you kill loads of the creatures you also accidentally damage the fief.
(Militia defending = 3) They only kill a few of the things.
(Civilians defending = 3) They also kill a few of them.
Everyone keep enlightening the pumpkin zombies, and actually repair the monastery.
(You enlightening pumpkin zombies = 3) You only manage to get a few to join.
(Followers enlightening pumpkin zombies = 5) They gather a large amount of the monsters.
(Followers enlightening pumpkin zombies = 6) They damage some stuff as they leave to gather huge amounts of followers.
(Repairing the monastery = 6) They fix every bit of the damage, including the damage caused this turn.
The zombies and demons keep killing while I use some spells to make the zombie pumpkins explode.
(Demons attacking = 6) They damage the fortress as they run out to kill loads of the pumpkin zombies.
(Zombies attacking = 2) They just kind of wander around.
(Casting explosive spells = 4) You blow up several large chunks of the hoard.
Destroy everything that isn't Canada.
(1) They all fall into space and die.
(2) They sit and do nothing.
(2) They don't really do anything.
(4) They tear down some stores.
(4) They break all kinds of stuff.
(4) They break a several stores.
(1) They explode for no reason.
(6) They blowup some stuff and then die.
(6) They break a bridge and die.
(2) They sit and drink beer and scream at cows.
(6) They all blow up a damn and die.
(2) They start some fist fights with each other.
(3) They break a few windows.
(5) They break all the hospitals.
(6) They eat a bunch of gas then explode.
(1) They all fall off mountains.
Get other pumpkin zombies to join.
(2) They just sit around the fire and smoke some pot.
(6) They gather a bunch of followers, and accidentally damage some stuff celebrating.
(4) They gather loads of followers.
(6) They gather so many followers that they damage some stuff coming back to base.
Places in space:-
Percent of The Town destroyed: 3.12%-
Percent of Ziizo's Animal City destroyed: 0%-
Percent of Spacenoid mothership destroyed: 2.15%Percent of America destroyed: 29.74%-
Percent of Dustan Hache's fief destroyed: 0%-
Percent of Outsider's monastery destroyed: 10.46%-
Percent of Evil sorceress's fortress destroyed: 8.42%-
Percent of Spacenoid base destroyed: 0%Percent of Canada Earth destroyed 29.35%-
Percent of Pumpkin Hippy commune destroyed 19.51%Yoink
Health: FINE / flaming pants
Inventory: loaded shotgun, some marijuana, a few lighters, some rolling paper, chips, candy, soda, glass bottles of beer, different kinds of chips, big ass sword, sword surfing skills, beer, small bag of chips
Kakaluncha / Emperor of Mankind costume / The Emperor of Mankind / Telepath / Able to teleport small items
Health: FINE
Inventory: a bowl, two animated trees, Ninja Elvis costume, The Flying Guillotine, manifesto about the Cult to the Supreme Being, air plane, blood pilot, Maximilien Robespierre's ghost, Napoleon Bonaparte's ghost, knows everything about coups, knows about different propaganda, laptop, Leon Trotsky's ghost, Vladimir Lenin's ghost, know everything about revolutions, 34 ghostly Russian troops, Robespierre costume, a bunch of candy, 100 ghosts in the afterlife, some radiation as an ally, some mecha parts, unknown amount of followers in North America, plan to takeover Europe, more radiation friends, partly build comms system, big radio tower
France: United, 314,852 follows, no radiation, one power plant, super efficient economy, the most stable, efficient, and self sustaining version of France EVER, global superpower, great again
Afterlife: a French puppet state, lead by distinguished puppers
Europe: back to what it was before the apocalypse, 2,426,321 followers
Dustan Hache / knight / blessed with strength
Health: MORE DAMAGE / broken arm in sling
Inventory: slightly damaged Plate armour, shield, sword, one small candy, bowl of candy, two bags of candy, even more candy, one factories worth of candy
Fiefdom: walls, lots of food, crops, Good moral, hunting party, water snake with arms that takes care of the crops, militia ready to fight some more injured
ziizo
Health: FINE
Inventory: road atlas, lime green hatchback with full tank of gas slightly damaged, large pipe, music CD, all kinds of cooking tools, mutant deer thing has the legendary laser gun, very big army of animals, zord manual, ULTRA-MEGA-ZORD made from ten zords and has nine animal pilots, space pirate ship, one partly finished space pirate ship
Animal city: traps, trenches all around, razor wire, landmines, fortified walls and positions, more mounted machine guns, improved to with stand being space, space worthy, in space, space port of pirates
Naturegirl1999 / doesn't have the power to switch bodies / has telekinesis
Health: DAMAGED
Inventory: three canned goods, some bottled water, three followers
CABL / Is a fully grown giant eucalyptus tree with a house in it / never able open a portal to the demon bloodsports dimension / giant sword arm / magic barrier filled with breathable atmosphere / power to make fire elementals from people that get burnt by you and your fire elementals, second prophet of FUNK
Health: SOME MORE DAMAGE
Inventory: living furniture, better dance moves than any tree, Holy FUNK book
Some weird, hellish, 666 degree Celsius, plane of existence: 8,090 fire elementals two injured members of the FUNKY Church, 8,166 Demonic Foliage members of the FUNKY Church, some more acidic spore sacs
ANGRY_DEMON_NOISES / Is Angry Halloween Kaiju / soul magic / ULTRA OVERDEITY OF HALLOWEEN / combined with Samhain and Gates of Hell haunted house / blessing of strong bones and spookiness
Health: SLIGHT DAMAGE
Inventory: 4000 page waiver that has to be signed to get into the haunted house if you sign it or read it you lose your soul, one soul, posters advertising the GATES OF HELL HAUNTED HOUSE, Smoke Mirrors's ankles, thirty souls, a bunch of demons, all of Earth's gumball machines, necronomicon, bigger suit case
The Canadian kitten / ability to fly / god powers / mind moderately crushed crushed / explosion proof
Health: FINE
Inventory: several cans of food, can opener, some cans of food, some bottles of water, 9mm handgun, bike, first aid kit with aspirin a few bandages and a first aid pamphlet, knife, shotgun, rifle, .44 magnum revolver, anti-tank rifle
Enemy post / employee of the month
Health: FINE
Inventory: rock, has a job in a "office" organizing files and papers regarding new species and issues faced by the new world
Smoke Mirrors / Angelo and Diablo / couldn't lose your soul even if you wanted to / one ankle / angel magic / OVERDEITY OF ALL HOLIDAYS / on fire
Health: SOME MORE DAMAGED
Inventory: six million souls, "Totally Average Human"TM costume
Avetruetotheimperator / SPACE GUY / in badly damaged Mecha with one missing leg and the other is badly damaged / vauge space psychic powers
Health: FINE
Inventory: one brand new mecha, and a slightly damaged tank, some earthnoids weapons, massive pile of candy, scientist, APC, infantry squad
Fortified base in a park, medical tent, fortified, repair equipment, device that allows trans port back to the planet
Medium sized fortress on the planet
Outsider / ascetic monk
Health: MORE DAMAGE
Inventory: 12 enlightened, 36 injured enlightened people, a bunch of tools, some of building materials, 782,172 enlightened pumpkin zombies
Monastery: farm, wall
WyrdByrd / FUNK-Master / increases FUNKability
Health: FINE
Inventory: 15 FUNKY disciples, 23 FUNKY creatures, LAVA LAMP, DISCO BALL, STEREO, 36 people enlightened about the FUNK
FUNKY Church: Filled with FUNKY stuff, "Holy FUNK book", split between two parties
Evil sorceress
Health: FINE
Inventory: 58 zombies, 367 demons
Former gas station now a proper fortress: high walls, towers, a moat, in the middle of nowhere
The country of Oman has been destroyed.
If you wear a costume you become whatever the costume depicts.
The more candy you have the more powerful you become.
There's a massive army of animals.
The apocalypse happened.
The town may or may not exist, and is now in space, has a wall built around it.
Ceres has been destroyed.
Jupiter has been destroyed.
Super Hell has been destroyed.
The Unholy Pail has been killed.
VY Canis Majoris has been destroyed.
There's a giant ball made from dead animals in the town.
There's a demon bloodsports dimension.
There's a portal to the Funkiverse in the town.
A giant pumpkin zombie army seven billion strong that hates everything but Canada and has free will.
The city with animals has traps.
The moon is much bigger.
Canada has be magically renamed to Earth.
The entire Earth has been covered with a wave of FUNK.
The moon is a DISCO BALL.
The FUNKY Church is a thing, but its divided.