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[Laterigrade]

I refuse to eat them.

[King Zultan]

I refuse to eat them.

But what if they want to eat you?

[Laterigrade]

I refuse to eat them.

But what if they want to eat you?

I will politely decline. I will say, ‘friends don’t eat friends.’

[Eric Blank]

Friends with benefits do

[Laterigrade]

Friends with benefits do

What? Really? What kind a’ benefits? Like tax deductions?

[King Zultan]

Friends with benefits do

What? Really? What kind a’ benefits? Like tax deductions?

They give you mushrooms.

[Laterigrade]

Friends with benefits do

What? Really? What kind a’ benefits? Like tax deductions?

They give you mushrooms.

Why would friends who give each other mushrooms eat each other? Doesn’t that defeat the whole point of giving someone else mushrooms? Like, why give that fibrous goodness to someone else if you’re just going to eat it out of them later anyway?

[King Zultan]

The mushrooms make friends taste better when you eat them.

[Laterigrade]

The mushrooms make friends taste better when you eat them.

Well that sort of makes some kind of sense, I sort of might guess. Is it that they are sweeter, or is it that they are crunchier?

[King Zultan]

Well that sort of makes some kind of sense, I sort of might guess. Is it that they are sweeter, or is it that they are crunchier?

I assume it would be based on the kind of mushrooms you are given.

[PlumpHelmetMan]

I'm gonna go ahead and assume that this is the real reason hobbits enjoy mushrooms so much. No wonder Tolkien never showed us that side of them.

[Spriggans]

It is indeed said that Hobbits had a passion for mushrooms, surpassing even the greediest likings of "Big People".
Especially, the ones which grew on Old farmer Maggot's fields were of exquisite taste.
Some even say that Old Maggot trained his dogs especially for the purpose of protecting his fungal loot.

[PlumpHelmetMan]

So it's agreed then? Alright, we must prepare the heist on Farmer Maggot's precious mushroom crop.

Everyone roll Stealth checks.

[Spriggans]

I rolled 2 out of 10... hu hooo... 

[PlumpHelmetMan]

Same...though with modifiers mine adds up to 4.

As you cross the mushroom fields, you hear the barking of old Farmer Maggot's dogs in the distance.