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[Sosoku234]

HELP WANTED!

All persons may apply. Experience welcome, but not required. Equipment not provided.

Wanted: Individuals for miscellaneous jobs such as Salvage, Repair, Rescue, Extermination, etc.
As stated above, any may apply. Pay rates are negotiable. To sign up, fill in this document and bring it in to your nearest recruiting office.

Possible Hazards: All of them.

^{This flyer is approved and supported by the DELVER INC recruiting team.}

What is your name? ____________________________________________________
What are you? ________________________________________________________
Where are you from? ___________________________________________________
Do you have any next of kin? ____________________________________________
... ((The rest continues in the Char Sheet))

Spoiler: Character Sheet for Easy Copy (click to show/hide)

((Preface. Single parenthesis is on the paper, double is me speaking directly to you, the player.))

What is your name? ____________________________________________________
What are you? ________________________________________________________
Where are you from? ___________________________________________________
Do you have any next of kin? ____________________________________________
EXPLOSIONS? ________________________________________________________
Does the previous question confuse you? ___________________________________
Are you a felon? (This does not affect your employment.) _______________________
If your answer was yes to the above, State your felony. ________________________
Are you ready for ADVENTURE? ___________________________________________
Who is the current POTUS, if applicable? ((If you're from the future, make someone up.)) _______________________________________________
[REDACTED]
What are you taking with you? (Give your equipment here. (I don't particularly care what you bring))
Are there any peculiarities about you? ((If you have powers tell me here and describe them. Try not to be extremely OP, but feel free to go wild with it.))

Spoiler: game mechanics (click to show/hide)

Rolls are from Random.org. For Most rolls I will use 20. There are no stats, all rolls are based on current condition, buffs, and debuffs from said condition.
I will use the patented Chunky Salsa health system. I will make effects as the game progresses and damage occurs (example: Concussion: -1 to all rolls for 5 turns or until fixed, whichever is first.)

The Living Employees

Spoiler: Theta-5 (click to show/hide)

Status: Limb Broken [Hammer Arm]
Location: Road to Pripyat

Spoiler: Diggy (click to show/hide)

Status: Broken Foot [R]
Location: Road to Pripyat

Spoiler: Blarg (click to show/hide)

Status: Fine
Location: Road to Pripyat

Spoiler: Bullet Cassidy (click to show/hide)

Status: Fine
Location: Road to Pripyat

Spoiler: Nemra (click to show/hide)

Status: Fine
Location: Shed

Spoiler: Decimatius (click to show/hide)

Status: Fine
Location: Shed

The Dead Employees

[Glass]

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

What is your name? Theta-5
What are you? I am a warforged artificer!
Where are you from? Eberron
Do you have any next of kin? Not to my knowledge
EXPLOSIONS? Um, sure?
Does the previous question confuse you? It is not really a question...
Are you a felon? (This does not affect your employment.) What is a felon?
If your answer was yes to the above, State your felony. ________________________
Are you ready for ADVENTURE? I was built for adventure!
Who is the current POTUS, if applicable? What is a POTUS?
[REDACTED] ? ? ?
What are you taking with you? (Give your equipment here.) I have a crossbow attached to my arm, a big hammer, a thunder cannon, a tinker's toolkit, a smaller hammer, a couple flintlock pistols, and a lot of assorted mechanical scraps.
Are there any peculiarities about you? Well, I mean, I am made of metal and all that. And I am pretty good at magic, better than the magewrights the dragonmarked houses have. Oh, and I have gotten pretty decent at doing self-modifications.

Behold a very confused character.

[Sosoku234]

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

What is your name? Theta-5
What are you? I am a warforged artificer!
Where are you from? Eberron
Do you have any next of kin? Not to my knowledge
EXPLOSIONS? Um, sure?
Does the previous question confuse you? It is not really a question...
Are you a felon? (This does not affect your employment.) What is a felon?
If your answer was yes to the above, State your felony. ________________________
Are you ready for ADVENTURE? I was built for adventure!
Who is the current POTUS, if applicable? What is a POTUS?
[REDACTED] ? ? ?
What are you taking with you? (Give your equipment here.) I have a crossbow attached to my arm, a big hammer, a thunder cannon, a tinker's toolkit, a smaller hammer, a couple flintlock pistols, and a lot of assorted mechanical scraps.
Are there any peculiarities about you? Well, I mean, I am made of metal and all that. And I am pretty good at magic, better than the magewrights the dragonmarked houses have. Oh, and I have gotten pretty decent at doing self-modifications.

Behold a very confused character.

Looks good to me.

[Superdorf]

Heyy, this looks fun! I'll bite!

Spoiler: Presenting... Diggy! (click to show/hide)

What is your name? frends call me diggy. forgot real name.
What are you? im a diggberd hairy-mijet filfy-animul dworf.
Where are you from? dunno. ben riding treyns for long time.
Do you have any next of kin? der was mama. forgot name. was nice mama.
EXPLOSIONS? yaaaaahh!
Does the previous question confuse you? not rely. was gud queshton quesiton.
Are you a felon? (This does not affect your employment.) only if dey cot me. i dont think dey cot me.
If your answer was yes to the above, State your felony. maybe lots. i stoll sum stuf, i fink. also ride treyns wen treyn drivers not luking.
Are you ready for ADVENTURE? wot AD% ADVENT% A%VENTU ADVENTURE? diggy dig.
Who is the current POTUS, if applicable? diggy not no wot dat is.
[REDACTED] wot REDACT% REDACTED?
What are you taking with you? diggy hav pik. also diggy hav helmet wif liddul layt light leygt. also diggy hav bagpag wif lotsa meet and stuff. also diggy hav deynamit daynameyt dagnabbit diynamit canon. is good canon. is prezent frum mama.
Are there any peculiarities about you? diggy short. also diggy see in dark. also diggy get rely mad sumtyems sumtymes. also diggy smel layk cheez, not know why.

Diggy cannot spell very well. Also, what's a "POTUS"? Diggy doesn't know, and neither do I.

[Sosoku234]

Heyy, this looks fun! I'll bite!

Spoiler: Presenting... Diggy! (click to show/hide)

What is your name? frends call me diggy. forgot real name.
What are you? im a diggberd hairy-mijet filfy-animul dworf.
Where are you from? dunno. ben riding treyns for long time.
Do you have any next of kin? der was mama. forgot name. was nice mama.
EXPLOSIONS? yaaaaahh!
Does the previous question confuse you? not rely. was gud queshton quesiton.
Are you a felon? (This does not affect your employment.) only if dey cot me. i dont think dey cot me.
If your answer was yes to the above, State your felony. maybe lots. i stoll sum stuf, i fink. also ride treyns wen treyn drivers not luking.
Are you ready for ADVENTURE? wot AD% ADVENT% A%VENTU ADVENTURE? diggy dig.
Who is the current POTUS, if applicable? diggy not no wot dat is.
[REDACTED] wot REDACT% REDACTED?
What are you taking with you? diggy hav pik. also diggy hav helmet wif liddul layt light leygt. also diggy hav bagpag wif lotsa meet and stuff. also diggy hav deynamit daynameyt dagnabbit diynamit canon. is good canon. is prezent frum mama.
Are there any peculiarities about you? diggy short. also diggy see in dark. also diggy get rely mad sumtyems sumtymes. also diggy smel layk cheez, not know why.

Diggy cannot spell very well. Also, what's a "POTUS"? Diggy doesn't know, and neither do I.

I like him. A bit hard to understand at times, but still good. The POTUS is the President of the United States. I'm using it as a sort of measurement of when the character is from, assuming their from our version or a similar version of earth in the future/past/present.

[King Zultan]

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

What is your name? Blarg
What are you? A bipedal zebra.
Where are you from? A swamp in Florida.
Do you have any next of kin? Maybe I don't know.
EXPLOSIONS? Yes.
Does the previous question confuse you? Maybe?
Are you a felon? (This does not affect your employment.) Probably not.
If your answer was yes to the above, State your felony.
Are you ready for ADVENTURE? Yeah.
Who is the current POTUS, if applicable? They make Porta toilets or something don't they?
[REDACTED] I feel like I'm missing something here.
What are you taking with you? (Give your equipment here.) A M1911, spare ammo and mags for the M1911, a golf club, a brick, and a knife.
Are there any peculiarities about you? No idea.

[Sosoku234]

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

What is your name? Blarg
What are you? A bipedal zebra.
Where are you from? A swamp in Florida.
Do you have any next of kin? Maybe I don't know.
EXPLOSIONS? Yes.
Does the previous question confuse you? Maybe?
Are you a felon? (This does not affect your employment.) Probably not.
If your answer was yes to the above, State your felony.
Are you ready for ADVENTURE? Yeah.
Who is the current POTUS, if applicable? They make Porta toilets or something don't they?
[REDACTED] I feel like I'm missing something here.
What are you taking with you? (Give your equipment here.) A M1911, spare ammo and mags for the M1911, a golf club, a brick, and a knife.
Are there any peculiarities about you? No idea.

Sounds zany. You're in. Also no need to say extra magazines and ammo. I'm not gonna regulate that. If you want to replace that, then go ahead. If not, then have fun.

[Failbird105]

Spoiler: Bullet Cassidy (click to show/hide)

What is your name? Bullet. Bullet Cassidy.
What are you? Novakid
Where are you from? I dunno, does it matter?
Do you have any next of kin? Uh, jeeze, was I really supposed to remember that? I usually leave the remembering up to the family
EXPLOSIONS? Boom
Does the previous question confuse you? Nah
Are you a felon? (This does not affect your employment.) Not that you can prove
If your answer was yes to the above, State your felony. What are ya, a sheriff?
Are you ready for ADVENTURE? You bet your sweet sunshine I am
Who is the current POTUS, if applicable? Uh, that was an Earth history thing, wasn't it?
[REDACTED] [RESPONSE REDACTED]
What are you taking with you? (Give your equipment here.) Oxygen(durasteel revolver), Hydrogen(dragonhead pistol), Gambler's armor, a Matter Manipulator(doesn't work on moving things, trust me, I've tried), and this weird Space Sword that I can't spell.
Are there any peculiarities about you? Well uh, Novakids glow real bright, so that'll probably be nice in caves. I've also got myself a Sonic Sphere, Blink Dash, and Rocket Jump techs. Oh and uh, we kinda get... volatile, if our brand breaks. As in, we explode

I basically gave her some the best stuff that doesn't require being the main protagonist of Starbound. So uh, sorry if the last two items are a bit too much.

[Sosoku234]

Spoiler: Bullet Cassidy (click to show/hide)

What is your name? Bullet. Bullet Cassidy.
What are you? Novakid
Where are you from? I dunno, does it matter?
Do you have any next of kin? Uh, jeeze, was I really supposed to remember that? I usually leave the remembering up to the family
EXPLOSIONS? Boom
Does the previous question confuse you? Nah
Are you a felon? (This does not affect your employment.) Not that you can prove
If your answer was yes to the above, State your felony. What are ya, a sheriff?
Are you ready for ADVENTURE? You bet your sweet sunshine I am
Who is the current POTUS, if applicable? Uh, that was an Earth history thing, wasn't it?
[REDACTED] [RESPONSE REDACTED]
What are you taking with you? (Give your equipment here.) Oxygen(durasteel revolver), Hydrogen(dragonhead pistol) Gambler's armor, a Matter Manipulator(doesn't work on moving things, trust me, I've tried), and this weird Space Sword that I can't spell.
Are there any peculiarities about you? Well uh, Novakids glow real bright, so that'll probably be nice in caves. I've also got myself a Spike Sphere, Blink Dash, and Rocket Jump techs. Oh and uh, we kinda get... volatile, if our brand breaks. As in, we explode

I basically gave her some the best stuff that doesn't require being the main protagonist of Starbound. So uh, sorry if the last two items are a bit too much.

I think the first (spike sphere) and last (rocket jump) Seem a bit OP. I'd say get rid of one and you're good.

[Failbird105]

I think the first (spike sphere) and last (rocket jump) Seem a bit OP. I'd say get rid of one and you're good.

Alright, switched out the Spike Sphere for the Sonic Sphere, which just goes fast.

[Sosoku234]

I think the first (spike sphere) and last (rocket jump) Seem a bit OP. I'd say get rid of one and you're good.

Alright, switched out the Spike Sphere for the Sonic Sphere, which just goes fast.

How does the sonic sphere differ from the dash?

[Failbird105]

How does the sonic sphere differ from the dash?

The sphere's dash is done while in effectively morph ball form, so it's smaller and can't be done easily mid-air, and also the blink dash passes through enemies while the sphere dash doesn't.

Although, perhaps they are too similar, in which case I could do the aqua sphere instead(the same thing, but instead of a dash it floats on water and can move easily through liquids, provided it can survive said liquids that is)

[Glass]

I think the first (spike sphere) and last (rocket jump) Seem a bit OP. I'd say get rid of one and you're good.

Alright, switched out the Spike Sphere for the Sonic Sphere, which just goes fast.

How does the sonic sphere differ from the dash?

You charge it up, cannonball away, and you're significantly smaller. Also, you only do the dash bit when you first shift; afterwards you're at standard ball mechanics.

[Sosoku234]

The sonic sphere is pretty nice. Alright. You're in.

I just wasn't sure if that was a mod thing or a core game thing. I actually really liked that in SB.

[Sosoku234]

"Today, you gather here for one thing. ADVENTURE!" A large and heavily muscled man, ((Not unlike Mr Torgue from Borderlands)). He points to an extremely large plasma screen TV and says in a loud tone "Now listen to these NEEEEEEEEEEERDS for the details of your first mission."

The screen roars to life and you see two disheveled scientists, that look like a trailer park after a tornado had rolled through. They shout out near incoherent technobabble. The gist is that they want you to root around in massive underground soviet bunker complex built into some caverns somewhere near Chernobyl  to look for a prototyped nuclear driven tank. For the Tiny nuclear reactor, they say. "Do you fine genetlemen have any questions?" The more calm of the two asks.