Turn 47(Init:Shaun, Angelo/Diablo, Thainos, Primus.)
With Power Milk-booster comms systems: Thainos, you owe me nothing right now, but I’ve got some Chaos assholes on my ship and I’d appreciate them stopping being a problem. Permanently, preferably.
And also if I could maybe check the molecular structure of your Milks, I’d appreciate it.
Also, reactivate the anti-Warp shielding.
As Thainos hefted the Unlimited Gauntlet, pulsating with awesome might. He looked at Delta. And from his lips, he spoke one word, a word that promised to destroy and unmake the AI's world.
"Nope"
"After all these years, all these battles. All the sacrifices I've made and the 18 movies and 31 turns spent on this quest...I've gathered the awesome power of the Infinite Dairies on my Unlimited Glove. Noone shall stand before me now. Not the Guardian of the Universe, Angelo/Diablo, not you, Delta the AI. And not even the Servant of the Emperor! For I. AM. INEVITABLE!"
Thanos will snap his fingers, and destroy HALF of all beings capable of producing any kind of milk, and destroy ALL Milk, in all planes, realities and dimensions. Hell Milk, Eldritch Milk, Heaven Milk, that weird thing Vegans call Milk. All will be reduced to dust.
His mind wanders to a weir dreamscape that's may or may not be the Soul Milk.
"Favorite Daughter?"
"Did you do it?
"Yes..."
"What did it cost?"
"More than 30 Turns. Oh and everything I ever loved..."
3 to grab the Glove, AUTO-5.As I lie dieing from the duel, the battle almost over, I cry to all sorts of gods, all sorts of powers, to please, please, please give me the power to defeat thainos and take the unlimited glove! Desperation fills me as I screech to even the ruinous powers to take hold of the glove. I shall have it...At all costs
6Strum my infinity guitar and try to disrupt Thainos through the connectiont to the infinity dairies.
3+1 to focus on Thainos, +1 for the connection. Guitar:22(Disadvantage on saving throws, which I interpreted as "weakening against attacks". It didn't matter in the end, though.)Transfer the actual weight of the Tardis to its exterior. Land on Thainos. Hide in an auxiliary control room, preferably with shields of some form. Contemplate where my life took the turn that brought me here.
6With Power Milk-booster comms systems: Thainos, you owe me nothing right now, but I’ve got some Chaos assholes on my ship and I’d appreciate them stopping being a problem. Permanently, preferably.
And also if I could maybe check the molecular structure of your Milks, I’d appreciate it.
Also, reactivate the anti-Warp shielding.
Try to get a scan of the infinity milks from my location.
(In addition to my other stuff.)
Snap survival:Not targeted.2, 5Thainos stands triumphant over the shattered body of Primus. His destiny is finally at hand, and the Universe will soon be set to his idea of balance. Thainos puts on the Unlimited Glove. As the power courses through him, he receives a communication from Delta.
"Thainos, you owe me nothing right now, but I’ve got some Chaos assholes on my ship and I’d appreciate them stopping being a problem. Permanently, preferably.
And also if I could maybe check the molecular structure of your Milks, I’d appreciate it."Thainos responds with a grin.
"Nope"
"After all these years, all these battles. All the sacrifices I've made and the 18 movies and 31 turns spent on this quest...I've gathered the awesome power of the Infinite Dairies on my Unlimited Glove. Noone shall stand before me now. Not the Guardian of the Universe, Angelo/Diablo, not you, Delta the AI. And not even the Servant of the Emperor! For I. AM. INEVITABLE!"At this point, Thainos is interrupted by the distinctive whooping sound of an incoming TARDIS.
Shaun O'Brian's TARDIS dematerializes in midair, about 20ft overhead. Inside, Shaun furiously works a control panel, inventively swapping all the bigger on the inside with the smaller on the outside. The TARDIS hits the unknown planet with the force of a large meteor, shattering the surface, darkening the sky, and crushing most of the evil army. The TARDIS and Thainos are driven deep underground by the impact, ultimately coming to rest in a large cavern. The blackened sky is faintly visible above them as the Irish phone box sits atop the fallen Titan. Rubble from above falls in a continuous trickle and thuds dimly around them. However, Thainos continues to move.
In Hell, Angelo and Diablo try a final desperate plan to stop Thainos. They strum the potentially world-ending Infinity Guitar. They successfully use its connection to the Infinity Milks to limit the effects to Thainos alone. This weapon could have turned Thainos into a potted plant, or made him explode, or rendered him too insane to use the Glove. Unfortunately, in this case it just sickens him and leaves him vulnerable to a finishing attack.
With another thud, the top half of Primus lands in the pit, screaming prayers to all the powers of Chaos for one last chance to take the Glove and dragging himself toward Thainos with all his strength. However, although the daemons keep him moving, he isn't fast enough to reach Thainos in time.
Thainos weakly raises his hand, and snaps his fingers one last time. As before, a massive flash of light is unleashed. Delta's quantum brain gets to work, scanning the Unlimited power washing through and past the Moloko.
The will of Thainos is carried out, everywhere, on every world and plane. All milk is reduced to dust. Cartons and glasses are left with nothing but dust. Countless farmers milking their dairy creatures are shocked to see nothing but dust in their buckets. Most importantly, all the liquid water of the universe was accidentally turned to milk by Angelo/Diablo. When the Snap hits, the former water is nothing but dust. Then the second half of Thainos' command is carried out.
It wasn't enough to eliminate all currently existing milk. The supply must be cut as well. To Thainos, this means halving the mammal population of the Universe. Everywhere, exactly half of all mammals start to turn to dust.
Thainos' mind wanders to a strange landscape, where he has a vision of the daughter he sacrificed for no reason.
"Favorite Daughter?""Did you do it?
"Yes...""What did it cost?"
"More than 30 Turns. Oh and everything I ever loved..."At the core of Thainos' ideas was the idea of fairness. That applies even now. As Thainos returns to reality, he sees the Milks boiling off his Glove, erased as well by the Snap. As he watches this, the Glove falls off and thumps to the ground. Underneath is his rapidly disintegrating hand. Thainos leans back and smiles in grim fulfillment as he turns to dust.
The top half of Primus crawls over to the Glove in the last moments before the Milks disappearing. He's barely placed his hand into the Glove when the Snap finally finishes off the rest of him.
Everywhere in existence, wherever and whatever they are, people realize that they just ran out of milk and they need to get more.
And then things
really started to get bad.
Try to find and control an Eldritch creature that can fly, use this flying creature to bring both of your bodies to the mortal plane
Snap survival:Not targeted.6, 1-1You successfully burst tendrils from the skin of your current host and add a thing that is not altogether crows, buzzards, or decomposed human beings to your merged body. The wings flap awkwardly under your power as you push it into the mortal plane. You make it back over the threshold as the Eldritch Plane finally rots the portal network connecting it to the Bazaar and the Void. You've made it to the mortal plane just in time to see the beginning of the Milkpocalypse.
"No need to thank me for accidentals actions"
Stop dreaming about Chaos erasing it completely
Snap survival:Not targeted.3You cease to dream of Chaos, but somehow Eliphas manages to persist in existing through sheer will. In any event, you have bigger problems coming up. You're the mind of the Universe, but you're also a janitor. Thainos just made a massive mess of the cosmos. Cleaning it up will be quite the project.
Perform blood ritual to move myself to Prospero during the height of the great crusade and before Magnus broke everything
1+1You sense that this timeline is no longer survivable and decide to evacuate. You try casting the necessary spells, but it's too late. The Snap reaches you, and you are disintegrated along with half of all other mammals.
Get my shit together and fly outta the building, FALCON PAWNCHING and penetrating several star being fragments.
Snap survival and action:"Best of all possible worlds."You get back up from the desk and consider your situation. All you've got to do is take down a godlike cosmic being using only your fists. You're glad you took that extra course in training, even if you never thought it would come up at the time. AllBob lashes out with more space-themed than you can count. You activate your rocket boots and begin dodging. Somehow, you make it through. It seemed highly improbable, but you realize you made it through and deliver a deadly FALCON PUNCH to AllBob's face. AllBob is destroyed by your blow and falls apart into a rain of golden DNA. You land on the street, expecting cheers.
Instead, you see chaos everywhere. The oceans are dust, all milk is gone, and half the people are disintegrating in the street. Someone needs to restore order.
You have your work cut out for you.
"That was the Alliance's best guy? I was expecting more, at least he almost got me with that grenade and that made it interesting, but I'm done fighting now."
Use the power of gravity to smash the building and crush that guy, then crush the Alliance building as well.
Snap survival:Immune.TRANSCENDENTYou watch from the disconnected perspective of all possibilities as Jordan Alexander charges you. In most timelines, you kill him here. The building crumples, and he dies. You unleash the Sun, and he dies. You drop the Moon, and he dies. In a good 50% of timelines, it's a moot point when Thainos' snap dusts him. There's one odd timeline where he does everything perfectly, survives the Snap, and actually defeats you. You file that timeline away for later study.
But in the end, that fight doesn't matter too much. You return your awareness to the endless timelines around you. You have access to the DNA of potential itself. And you are Doctor AllBob after all.
It's time to do some science.
Silence: Sighs in relief now that its over
Silence: Goes to Douges aid
Silence: Fumbles around for medical supplies
Silence: Attempts to reattach Douges horn
2+1 for mini-Douges.
The end.
Shaun O'Brian sits alone in a saferoom contained within the ruins of his broken TARDIS, considering the life choices that led to this point. Outside, he can dimly hear the howls and crashes of the ongoing Milkpocaylpse outside. He jumps up and raises a broken bottle to defend himself as footsteps sound from the door of his saferoom. Angelo/Diablo walks in, raising a hand in a friendly gesture.
"Hello, Shaun. Things don't seem to be going very well lately, are they?"
Shaun peers over the broken bottle, gauging Angelo/Diablo's intent. Angelo/Diablo responds by holding up a holographic projector displaying Delta's molecular-level scan of the Infinity Milks.
"I'd like to talk to you about the Avengers Initiative."
Author
Topic: Minimalism and Milk 3 (Read 136376 times)