Turn 41"I've come so far, my destiny awaits me...But let me catch up with my green baby girl first, don't want to lose track of what's really important in life, the small things."
Go see my favorite daughter by using a time portal created via a combo of Time + Space Milk.
"Hey kiddo...I know we haven't talked much, due to me replacing your sister's body parts with cybernetic implants and you leaving to live with your boyfriend and his outlaw friends. He's a cool guy, by the way, I like him, nice catch...But I just...*Sigh* I don't know how to do this...I think, that we kind of lost the closeness we had. I was thinking we could get together, just you and me. And go camping in the center of the universe next to Azatoth like we used to when you were little, try to get back on speaking terms. Watcha say kiddo?"
If she agrees, portal time.
(The sheer implicit cruelty of this one...it does put a smile on my face.)
4+1, 4+1It's important not to
sacrifice time with your kids. It's always tragic when a relationship
falls apart. You can't
throw away little moments like camping over at Azathoth's place. You decide to go meet with Gamora. Since your daughter hasn't been born yet in this timeline, you use the Space and Time milks to teleport onto her new friends' spaceship, the Milano. About half a dozen weapons are immediately leveled at you when you appear in their meeting room, yet your emotional appeal gets through to them. Your daughter agrees to accompany you (much to the irritation of her boyfriend), and the two of you teleport to that planet at the eye of the storm that is Azathoth. Vormir's skyline looks more unstable than usual. Apparently, someone is waking up Azathoth. Tentacles writhe and blind eyes roll in their sockets. At least enough light drips from the creature to allow you to see in Vormir's typical dim lighting. If Azathoth fully wakes up, Life will end immediately.
"Thanks man this is exactly the thing I needed, hey what happened to those little suns you were trying to make, you know the ones that were going to make it easier to get the sun's DNA?" Just as he was about to leave suddenly remembers something, "Also its been two years do you think the government stopped looking for that mailman you killed, because I really need that mail truck out of my garage."
Ask my questions then head back to my house and give UberBob the sun's DNA, then find out what we're doing from there.
1You ask Burt about his mini-sun project. It seemed like a harmless enough question, but you hear a humming noise as he levels his pistol at the back of your head. He speaks, but his voice is slightly muffled by him putting a hand over his own mouth to prevent you from grabbing his teeth.
"I TOLD DR. BOB THIS ONCE BEFORE. DR. BOB AND I USED TO EXCHANGE LETTERS. I PUT A LOT OF EFFORT INTO CUTTING UP THOSE MAGAZINES FOR THE LETTERS. HE ASKED ME THEN, AND I KNOW I TOLD HIM ABOUT THEM. WHO ARE YOU??? WHY DO YOU LOOK LIKE BOB???"Hooded Bob attempts to get a flanking position, but Burt shoots a glare at him.
"I CAN INTERROGATE ONE O' YOU FAKES JUST AS GOOD AS ANOTHER. YOU MOVE AND YOUR GOVERNMENT BUDDY HERE GETS HIS BRAINS SCORCHED OUT!"Start cleaning the floors that small pinhole is perfect in case I need to refill the bucket
2+1 for getting milk for this purpose.You set up a bucket to gather the milk and start mopping the floors. It seems to be working out, but there's a lot of mess to clean up. You get about a third of the work done this time.
At least I can't die due to being already dead. At least Azathoth seems to be on our side, being an eldritch god and wanting to destroy the universe.
Attempt to use the ADN and power of the blood I consumed, and evolve the ability to manipulate blood. Use it to release the Seven.
4, 1+1You successfully evolve the power to skillfully manipulate blood, but for some reason you aren't able to break Rana's cages this time. As you make the attempt, you notice Three suddenly cry out in pain and grip his arm. Moments later, Seven is both injured and empowered by some unseen attacker. The Seven collectively turn and start flying at warp speeds, accompanied by their Eldritch guardians.
I’m going to conduct a few experiments. First of all, find a long-abandoned part of the Universe with functioning machinery. If it doesn’t fit the bill, change places to somewhere else.
First: Take one of the bones of the Seven, and subject it to the force of an industrialconpressor. Try to retrieve anything left of it, if it’s destroyed.
Second: Take one from a diferent goat, and immerse it in milk. Then, heat up the milk to boiling. Retrieve bone and note results.
Second: get one of those hammers that mechanical stand hammers modern blacksmiths use anx turn it on to full with the bone under it. Note results and retrieve.
Also, chexk to see what auxiliary control rooms there are in the Tardis.
5, 4, 1, 6, 2You decide to start your experiments in an abandoned part of the Universe that has working machines. No other place fits this description than Mechanus One. It is the former home of a robotic empire that fell when their bioengineered servants went rogue and destroyed them. The servitors have long since gone extinct themselves, so this should be an excellent place for your work. First, you take one of Three's bones, and crush it. Your instruments detect a quantum entanglement between the bone and its demonic owner elsewhere in the universe. Three effectively suffers a broken arm. You then try boiling one of Seven's bones in milk. This only powers her up, as she is refreshed by the milk. You then crush the bone in an automatic hammer. This hurts her, but the damage is balanced out by the boost from the milk. Finally, the Seven are now keenly aware of your location and what you're doing.
You also check for auxiliary control rooms, but your TARDIS is simply too big to find any such rooms right now.
Try to Resorb some of the blood I lost to grow a spike to impale the small creature coming towards me
5As the creature closes in on you, you hurriedly fly into a blob of floating blood and absorb just enough mass to make a spike. You set it against the creature and successfully impale it through the brain. It continues to twitch around long after you remove the spike, but it is no longer a threat to you.
Silence: Ties him up
Silence: Brings him to the space police
Silence: Celebrates!
(Also to smoke I wouldnt exactly call thainos universe ending since he just wants to wipe out half the space cows in the universe but no one really knows that so yeah)
1Moloko: Get into stratosphere and analyze Thainos DNA signatures.
Imperial Guard: Give out the red helmet with red horns for analysis. Await the order to beam down at the location of the latest DNA signatures of Thainos.
GiantDad: Beam down along with the Imperial Guard.
3, 6, 3You order the Moloko to search the atmosphere for traces of Thainos. His most recent location on Earth is the rubble of the Grail temple in England. You beam down with the Guard and investigate the rubble. He was clearly there, but left a while ago. According to the Alliance guards, he teleported inside with the Space Milk, briefly battled the turrets in a chamber where a sample of the Holy Grail's milk was kept, and ultimately successfully escaped with the sample after destroying the temple with the Power Milk. Thankfully, several other samples of the Grail's milk were saved from the destruction and are being moved to other facilities for safekeeping.
You also order the Guardsmen at the ancient house to analyze the red helmet. The archives indicate that this helmet belonged to the Chaos general known as Eliphas the Inheritor. As they research the topic, some of the Moloko's scientists start to show an unsettling admiration for this Eliphas.
Give the robots a standing order to only discuss their mobile games with each other.
Can I search time for traces of Thainos? Especially be on the lookout for history in the process of being changed.
3, 4You order the drones to only talk about mobile games with each other. They agree to be much more subtle about it, at least. Now they just sneak in references while talking about other topics.
You also use the tachyon DNA scanners to search for Thainos' presence in the timestream. Surprisingly, he just returned to the present. His current location is at the center of the universe, on the planet Vormir. As is normal for it, Vormir is surrounded on all sides by Azathoth's body. You can still get in, but it will take some effort.
Contact Nyarlothothep via blood magic and ask him, how to fix all this shite with goats, azatoth waking up and madman going to erase universe ? Do whatever he tells.
(I'm a bit surprised that you want a solution to the Azathoth problem. Why'd you wake him up if you didn't want the universe to end? Also, your "blood magic" was a clever invention. I don't think I've seen a more powerful ability since Lincoln's Hat.)
3+1You use blood magic to contact Nyarlathotep and ask how you can deal with all these apocalyptic threats. You convulse on the ground as the Crawling Chaos sends you a nightmare of the Unlimited Glove snapping its fingers and unleashing infinite power across the universe. He also shows the universe dying at the hands of Azathoth and the Seven. However, you survive to witness this by escaping to an alternate time and/or place. The vision is unclear on where exactly you went.
EDIT: Hey, EP, Thainos should be triggering past Angelo and Diablo's apocalypse senses.
4Since I am in Azathoth’s dream, logically I am in his mind. Thus, in proximity to use my “Eldritch Beings go to sleep” spell again. Do that, targeting Azathoth.
1+1You try to access Azathoth's thoughts and put him back to sleep, but are unsuccessful this time.
At about this time, Thainos' trip to the past alters your personal history. In Genericville, Angelo and Diablo are distracted from Diablo's scheme to turn all milk into orange juice by sensing Thainos' brief appearance in their time. You aren't able to do anything then, but the advance warning gives you time to prepare. You use the time to learn specialized anti-titan techniques. You now have +1 on rolls to fight Thainos, which cancels out his Power Milk for you. (You're also immune to his ability to kill PCs in one hit.)
Alright, they're not cooperating then. Turn off that device and locate the LAST Infinite Dairy
3You switch off the broadcast and refocus your efforts on research. You review archive footage of the Temple attack and other sources to determine which Milks Thainos likely already has, and then compare it to old legends to determine the remaining Milks. According to your findings, the last Infinity Milk is the Soul Milk, which is located on the planet Vormir. Vormir is at the center of the universe, surrounded by Azathoth.
Thainos has five of the six Infinity Milks.
The Seven will devour the mortal universe in four turns unless prevented.
Azathoth will end the dream of the universe in four turns unless prevented.
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Topic: Minimalism and Milk 3 (Read 136418 times)