Turn 29
Look at Dr Bob’s research notes and learn as much as possible
ask the hooded man if I could come with him to Cervidae to visit Dr. Bob, he possibly knows more about the creature than his notes alone
If he says yes, board the Z Wing, if he says no, search for and absorb any stray liquids in the lab to grow some sort of grabbing appendage and use said appendage to grab onto the Z wing, so I can still come with
(If Rana absorbs a liquid, its color will change to the color of the liquid it absorbs. Any new body part it makes will be the color of the liquid used to make the part
(I wanted to make sure I understand what you mean. Say you absorbed coffee, grew a limb, and then absorbed milk. Would Rana then be white with a brown limb?)
6, 2, 4, 4Find Dr. Bob
5-1 for loss of tracking.You study Dr. Bob's notes. You learn a lot from them, including a genetic recipe that is stated to produce safe and controllable minions. After that, you ask the hooded man if you can accompany him. The hooded man proudly refuses and marches off to steal a Z-wing. Once his back is turned, you reach into a beaker and absorb some green acid. You safely metabolize the material and form a tendril of green light. The hooded man steals a Z-wing with the effortless air of someone who's done it before, but doesn't notice as you latch on to the Z-shaped wing and trail along behind him.
The tracker shuts down, but the hooded man flies to Dr. Bob's home simply from memory.
(Continued in King Zultan's turn.)
"I'd better return that ship I "borrowed", I hope they like where I'm gonna put it."
Use my portal gun to teleport the Z-wing back to the Moloko inside the mainframe computer that runs it, and turn on my anti-tracking thing, then go buy some milk from the store.
4 vs 5, 4, 6You point the portal gun at the Z-wing and send it back to the Moloko. There's no way of telling from here if it landed where you wanted it to, but at least you sent a fairly clear message. You also activate a device to protect you from electronic scanners. That done, you head out to the store to buy more milk. You make it to the store, but then a Z-wing hovers down above you. Your device is still working, but this person must have found you some other way. The Z-wing lands, blowing away dust as it does. The DNA thief from the bazaar steps out of the cockpit and stands before you.
"Dr. Bob! Stop right there. I have a plan for us all, you see. All of us, Superior! All. of. us."The hooded man throws back his hood, revealing a face very similar to your own deer head. His horns have been shaved off, his fur is more patchy and gray, and he lacks vampiric traits, but he's still clearly you. He steps forward again. As he basks in the reveal, you see a tiny glowing creature attached to his ship. He doesn't seem to be aware of it.
"Perhaps I should explain. I am you, but from another timeline! You see, according to my calculations, every time anyone makes a decision, about six alternate timelines are created. In my world, I killed a man named Mr. Shaun O'Brian and stole a time machine from him! Of course, what the multiverse needs is a "primary" Dr. Bob. I've been collecting DNA from every Dr. Bob I can find, plus anyone else who seemed useful. I already got yours, but the Abomination was a truly special creation! Not many of us could have crafted such a thing. So this is my demand. Join me, Dr. Bob, and help me craft the Ultimate Bob. If not...The alternate Dr. Bob twirls his crowbar.
"Well, I can't let anyone potentially endanger Ultimate Bob, now can I?"Help kill the evil goats to gain PR to get into Earth. Do it by flying near them and using the Power Milk to turn them into purple stuff.
"Don't you seven ever tire? I am inevitable, no god, goat or man will stop my quest.
1At the helm of the repaired Sanctuary 2, you quickly fly back to the Bazaar. Some might think the sight of Thainos rushing to save the universe unusual, but you know the truth. Everything you've done, it's always been for the greater good. Most people simply lack the will to see it.
After arriving, you board the Thainoscopter and point the Power Milk at the circle of goats. They sense the incoming attack and react with a surprising burst of cold fury. Each goat snaps its head toward you, even the ones who have to twist their necks all the way around to do it. The goats draw power from another cosmic attack and hit you with a blast of pure unreality. The Thainoscopter takes the brunt of the damage and is blasted to dust. You fall a long way and crashland in the ruins of the Bazaar. The goats then go back to their ritual, greatly reinvigorated by the exercise.
-1 to goats destroying the universe.Hmmm...
Care to share your thoughts?
Yeah, I was just thinking, we already used the void, so...
I suppose that might work.
Send the now weakened Seven, and their summoner, to the Eldritch Plain.
1+1You weave a spell to send the Seven to the Eldritch Plain. It worked on the Doom Mug back in that timeloop you left behind, so perhaps it'll work here. You send the attack, but it fails. If it weren't for your practice in the field of saving the universe, it would have only strengthened their presence in the mortal world. As it is, they deflect your spell and use it to shoot down the Thainoscopter.
Well, now’s the part where I quietly try to figure out what the fuck I’m supposed to do, how I’m supposed to do it, what I actually want out of my life, what have my achievements actually done to make my life any better, and once again, what the hell am I doing with my life. I’ve become a Janitor on a ship, and I have no goal or ambitions. Except what? Make a cup of tea? Hah! I need to find my purpose... what I’m doing with my life...
What if I were to get a Tardis? Find soe way to Gallifrey, and get my hands on one of the old buggers? A proper, real time machine, like mine, but ten thousand times more infinitely better? It wouldn’t work much differently from the fundamental mechanics of mine, since there’s only so many ways to manipulate the Time vortex, though if it turns out to be also powered by Cows, I’ll be in trouble...
Begin by finding the Ship’s vault, and retrieving any Time Lord artefacts within.
(I'm very happy with your die roll just now.)
5You hatch a plan to steal a TARDIS. To get one, you'll need to lure in one of the Time Lords. You decide that a logical place to start would be with the ship's vault. You get in easily enough by using your position as a janitor. Passing by various unrelated relics, you open up the case of Time Lord items. Inside, you find a long coat, a fez, a bow tie, technical reports on Dalek armor and its weaknesses, and finally a sonic screwdriver in a place of honor. There is also a carefully sealed section. Inside is a
Stattenheim remote control. A warning label cautions that the linked TARDIS is currently occupied by an active Time Lord, who is expected to retaliate violently if her TARDIS is compromised.
Capture the scout bot and turn it into a roomba.
5The scout bot enters the room to apprehend you, but you grab it out of the air, pry it open, and rapidly reprogram it. The bot wanders off, blowing dirt into corners with its hover engines.
Sleep gas is then pumped into the room, but doesn't affect you. The swarms of rats and bats that follow however, those hurt quite a bit when they start biting and scratching. It could have been a lot worse, but they flee once the sleep gas starts dropping them.
Dominate rats/bats and other creatures of night present on the ship and send them after criminal scum janitor
Dr Bob did never ran into sun light during all that time being in cockpit of star fighter/going around planet?
5+1 vs 3You compel the rats and bats aboard the ship to go devour T'zzz. You're not even sure how bats got aboard the ship, but you take control of them anyway. They serve well, viciously tearing into T'zzz until sleep gas forces them to retreat.
...alright, Captain, now what do we do?
...captain?
...
Goddamnit Crunch where the fuck are you.
Try to locate the captain. Failing that, review the crew member database for who has the highest rank on the ship aside from myself.
6, no roll because the information is public on the OP.You review security footage and find the last known sighting of the captain. He's sitting at his desk and reviewing crew logs when a time vortex suddenly opens behind him. The Captain falls into it and the portal then closes. The camera reveals no further relevant information. It looks like you'll have to manage without a Cap'n for now. According to the usual rules of spacecraft rank, the next in line would usually be First Mate Joshua Dantès. However, since he revealed that he was actually a supernatural being and left his post, the current highest ranking crew member is Security Officer GiantDad.
Greet fellow creatures of the Void, since we're supposedly on the same side. Request that they give me some milk, so that I can open more gates between the Void and this plane.
5You successfully persuade the Void nightmares to hand over their milk by communicating that you are responsible for unleashing them and the Seven. They happily step aside and allow you the pool. As you collect it, you see that their drool has mixed in with the milk and made this sample particularly well suited to your plans.
Silence: Knows what to do
Silence: Gets his phone out
Silence: Goes to the Space Amazon Website
Silence: Orders a snake
Silence: Salutes the sky
6Fill the room/closet where T'zzz is hiding with sleeping gas by politely asking the Moloko's AI.
3You contact Delta and gas the room. Somehow, T'zzz is unaffected. You scan the room to check if he is perhaps a hologram or an android or the like. Surprisingly, his brain scans are consistent with a being experiencing REM sleep despite the fact that he's acting normally.
One turn to possible Doom Mug impact, although it won't naturally hit anything in the Void.
Unless prevented, the Seven will devour the universe in three turns.
Author
Topic: Minimalism and Milk 3 (Read 137002 times)