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[King Zultan]

You got a 2.
You got a jazz ensemble, but they can't play their instruments, talk or do much of anything, and when you take a closer look you find that they're just cardboard cutouts.

I wish for a lovely bunch of coconuts.

[RoseHeart]

I wish for a lovely bunch of coconuts.

5

An island girl in a grass skirt and coconut bra brings you endless coconut refreshments and falls madly in love with you.

"I wish, I wish, I was a fish!"

[The_Saladman]

2

Your wish came true but you forgot to get in the water before wishing. You are a fish, a drowning fish.

I wish for Reggie's son to be the next CEO of Nintendo America!

[FakerFangirl]

3
Reggie Jr takes over Nintendo and starts making mobile games... After major community backlash he gives up and focuses on Mario, Star Fox, Smash, and Pokémon. Reggie Jr monopolizes the children's console market, and with the help of Japanese developers, releases the world's best-selling title: Super Smash Bros. Royale

"I wish more people played DCSS."

[King Zultan]

1
Everyone stops playing DCSS as it is discovered to be a virus.

I wish for a zebra that talks.

[The_Two_Eternities]

You got a two!

You now have a talking zebra. Unfortunately, it makes only the sounds a normal zebra does.

I wish to be the supreme legal authority over the TRI-STATE-AREA!

[FakerFangirl]

it is discovered to be a virus.

[Imic]

You got a two!

You now have a talking zebra. Unfortunately, it makes only the sounds a normal zebra does.

I wish to be the supreme legal authority over the TRI-STATE-AREA!

2
You didn’t specify which Tri-state-area, and you end up beibg the legal authority over a piece of India in Pakistan in India. You’re nkt allowed to leave, because you don’t have a passport, because you can’t get a passport because you can’t leave the Tri-state-area because you’re still a citizen of Pakistan and you can’t get permission from India to leave. You eventually die of a heart attack one day because the people next door with a defibrelator were in a different country and as such weren’t allowed to cross the border.

[The_Two_Eternities]

You got a two!

But since you didn't wish for anything the genie throws half a brick at your head.

I wish I had an arrow.

[HmH]

I wish I had an arrow.

[1] Sudden sharp pain rings our from your leg, and you fall down screaming. A few seconds later, you force the scream down to the volume of a pained wheeze, blink your eyes clear and look down.
There is an arrow stuck in your kneecap.
But look at it from the bright side! You're now qualified to be a guard.

I wish I could do magic.

[Superdorf]

I wish I could do magic.

5

"Yer a wizard, Harry!"

Your eyes are opened to the heretofore unseen world of the arcane! Though you aren't capable of much more than cantrips yet, you'll grow far more powerful with practice, and in years to come will become a mighty wizard indeed. Time to grow that beard you always wanted!

I wish for the ability to summon food of any kind at will.

[Spriggans]

You rolled a 2

Your wish came true ! With a snap of your fingers, the food you were thinking of appear before you by magic !
But the food is very stinky, it is spoiled by several months and eating it would make you sick.


I wish I could breathe underwater...

[Superdorf]

6: Overshot!

You grow gills along your neck, develop webs between your fingers and lengthened toes-- and your lungs atrophy. You are as comfortable in water as any fish, a faster swimmer than any human athlete could hope to be... but can now survive only for scarce minutes in the unforgiving air.

You retire to the boundless ocean, isolated from civilized folk by your very biology. You speak with dolphins, sing with whales. Your life is the stuff of legend, your bond with the marine a kinship beyond the dreams of divers... but you have cast off your humanity forever.

It was worth it.

------------------------------

I wish for control over my dreams: to manipulate them at my choosing, and to make them real if I see fit.

[HmH]

I wish for control over my dreams: to manipulate them at my choosing, and to make them real if I see fit.

[3] You can control your dreams perfectly, and when you wish for it, they feel as real - no, more real - than what you experience when you're awake.
Sadly, they do not replace it, nor does your control allow you to stay in the dreams forever.
You find yourself longing for the vibrant colors, sensations and smells of your dreams through the hours you're forced to spend in the bleak, unforgiving reality.

I wish to be able to master any skill whatsoever in mere hours of practice.

[FakerFangirl]

I wish to be able to master any skill whatsoever in mere hours of practice.

[2] You install a Dwarf Fortress mod which speeds up skill-training in adventure mode. Yet not all of the skills are implemented yet, so you can't learn them.

I wish I was rich.