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Author Topic: Terrible Suggestions Thread  (Read 542738 times)

Eric Blank

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4320 on: March 24, 2022, 02:11:45 am »

The IRL apocalypse has no timer and can occur at any moment. This would imply an immediate apocalypse for all dwarf fortresses running on all computers worldwide, and thus would be both.

What we need is a DF condition that will end the world as we know it.
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I make Spellcrafts!
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

PlumpHelmetMan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4321 on: March 24, 2022, 02:36:27 am »

Come to think of it...strictly speaking there is always the minuscule chance of an apocalypse occurring at any moment, and that chance grows infinitesimally more likely with every six seconds that pass, so one could argue that this particular suggestion has already been implemented.
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It's actually pretty terrifying to think about having all of your fat melt off into grease because you started sweating too much.

Mobbstar

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4322 on: March 24, 2022, 10:41:25 am »

Come to think of it...strictly speaking there is always the minuscule chance of an apocalypse occurring at any moment, and that chance grows infinitesimally more likely with every six seconds that pass, so one could argue that this particular suggestion has already been implemented.

Yet another invisible depth to the game. Well done, Toady One!

IndigoFenix

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4323 on: March 24, 2022, 11:41:18 am »

When installed, DF plants a virus on your computer, in the form of AI-controlled dwarves than mine through your data and construct fortresses on your desktop.

Starver

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4324 on: March 24, 2022, 11:56:49 am »

When installed, DF plants a virus on your computer, in the form of AI-controlled dwarves than mine through your data and construct fortresses on your keyboard.
FTFY
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King Zultan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4325 on: March 25, 2022, 02:31:31 am »

Why stop at a fort in the keyboard why not also make a fort in YOUR SOUL!
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The Lawyer opens a briefcase. It's full of lemons, the justice fruit only lawyers may touch.
Make sure not to step on any errant blood stains before we find our LIFE EXTINGUSHER.
but anyway, if you'll excuse me, I need to commit sebbaku.
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dikbutdagrate

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4326 on: March 26, 2022, 11:45:03 pm »

Give the normal Dwarf Fortress client VR support.
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Eric Blank

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4327 on: March 26, 2022, 11:49:24 pm »

definitely not the steam version though. they dont deserve vr support.
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I make Spellcrafts!
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

rico6822

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4328 on: March 28, 2022, 05:44:09 pm »

Bone armor transforms humans into Darkwraith that can turn other humans into beef jerkies by life draining them fully aware. Produces moans as side effect.
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Does anybody know how to become an elephant man in adventure mode? I literally did all advanced world settings possible to increase chances.

PlumpHelmetMan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4329 on: March 28, 2022, 06:31:47 pm »

I misread that as "procedural moans as side effect" at first.

So if you're not gonna say it...procedural moans. For any situation that warrants them.
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It's actually pretty terrifying to think about having all of your fat melt off into grease because you started sweating too much.

Uthimienure

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4330 on: March 28, 2022, 07:05:03 pm »

If you're not saying it, I will... procedural moans when dwarves "get together" so we know it's actually happening, and it should also be in the announcements.

(edit: quotation marks added for innuendo's sake)
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FPS in Gravearmor (925+ dwarves) is 2-5 (v0.47.05 lives on).
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Laterigrade

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4331 on: March 28, 2022, 07:48:02 pm »

The apocalypse has a chance of happening every six seconds.
I mean, depending where you’re situated, that’s sometimes so.
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and the quadriplegic toothless vampire killed me effortlessly after that
bool IsARealBoy = false
dropping clothes to pick up armor and then dropping armor to pick up clothes like some sort of cyclical forever-striptease
if a year passes, add one to age; social experiment

PlumpHelmetMan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4332 on: March 28, 2022, 08:14:54 pm »

If you're not saying it, I will... procedural moans when dwarves "get together" so we know it's actually happening, and it should also be in the announcements.

(edit: quotation marks added for innuendo's sake)

Said procedural moans will also be accompanied by procedural saxophone music.
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It's actually pretty terrifying to think about having all of your fat melt off into grease because you started sweating too much.

Starver

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4333 on: March 28, 2022, 09:55:54 pm »

Procedural Yakety Saxophone music...
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PlumpHelmetMan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #4334 on: March 29, 2022, 12:18:56 am »

Procedural Yakety Saxophone music...

Nah...that should be saved for adventure mode combat.
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It's actually pretty terrifying to think about having all of your fat melt off into grease because you started sweating too much.
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