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Author Topic: Terrible Suggestions Thread  (Read 542035 times)

King Zultan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2025 on: August 27, 2020, 04:37:41 am »

Imagine thousands of micro dwarves building micro fortress, and fighting micro wars on your body, and that sounds like the itchiest thing I can think of.

I wonder if they'd count as parasites?
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The Lawyer opens a briefcase. It's full of lemons, the justice fruit only lawyers may touch.
Make sure not to step on any errant blood stains before we find our LIFE EXTINGUSHER.
but anyway, if you'll excuse me, I need to commit sebbaku.
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Starver

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2026 on: August 27, 2020, 06:03:26 am »

If all the little people just created cities all over your body, I'd rename them as metronomes.
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Naturegirl1999

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2027 on: August 27, 2020, 07:18:59 am »

Imagine thousands of micro dwarves building micro fortress, and fighting micro wars on your body, and that sounds like the itchiest thing I can think of.

I wonder if they'd count as parasites?
probably, in all likelihood they’d dig at you and take pieces of you, you’d have to get rid of them before they continue this, eventually turning your body into a giant flesh fortress after defeating/assimilating into their culture all of the opponents. The process will be very painful
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King Zultan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2028 on: August 28, 2020, 02:04:34 am »

Imagine thousands of micro dwarves building micro fortress, and fighting micro wars on your body, and that sounds like the itchiest thing I can think of.

I wonder if they'd count as parasites?
probably, in all likelihood they’d dig at you and take pieces of you, you’d have to get rid of them before they continue this, eventually turning your body into a giant flesh fortress after defeating/assimilating into their culture all of the opponents. The process will be very painful
After your body becomes a flesh fortress the micro dwarves can take over your body and use it to seek out people to spread micro dwarves to them.
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The Lawyer opens a briefcase. It's full of lemons, the justice fruit only lawyers may touch.
Make sure not to step on any errant blood stains before we find our LIFE EXTINGUSHER.
but anyway, if you'll excuse me, I need to commit sebbaku.
Quote from: Leodanny
Can I have the sword when you’re done?

anewaname

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2029 on: August 28, 2020, 04:33:06 am »

When a siege arrives and a player decides to wait behind a locked gate, sometimes this should result in the invaders igniting a bonfire and then igniting any flammable constructions they can access, including doors and raised gates.
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There is something to be said about, if the stakes are as high, maybe reconsider your certitudes. One has to be aggressively allistic to feel entitled to be able to trust. But it won't happen to me, my bit doesn't count etc etc... Just saying, after my recent experiences I couldn't trust the public if I wanted to. People got their risk assessment neurons rotten and replaced with game theory. Folks walk around like fat turkeys taunting the world to slaughter them.

Maximum Spin

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2030 on: August 28, 2020, 06:42:27 am »

When a siege arrives and a player decides to wait behind a locked gate, sometimes this should result in the invaders igniting a bonfire and then igniting any flammable constructions they can access, including doors and raised gates.
No, that actually sounds extremely reasonable and is also why you build castles out of stone. What are you some kinda elf?
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Starver

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2031 on: August 28, 2020, 07:30:08 am »

The game slowly but inexorably changes the person playing it into 'some kinda elf'. There is no cure. Nor any benefits.
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King Zultan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2032 on: August 29, 2020, 04:11:21 am »

The game slowly but inexorably changes the person playing it into 'some kinda elf'. There is no cure. Nor any benefits.
The game also slowly makes everyone that doesn't play it hate elves.
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The Lawyer opens a briefcase. It's full of lemons, the justice fruit only lawyers may touch.
Make sure not to step on any errant blood stains before we find our LIFE EXTINGUSHER.
but anyway, if you'll excuse me, I need to commit sebbaku.
Quote from: Leodanny
Can I have the sword when you’re done?

xZippy

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2033 on: August 29, 2020, 05:47:35 am »

They should just add Bruce Willis in the game because... comedy reasons.
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Fikilili

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2034 on: August 29, 2020, 08:35:25 am »

Re-do the elves. Cuz they don't make any sense.
Now alright, I'm pretty sure that DF's elves are more reminiscent to nymphs than the pointy eared bastards we love to hate. Lovin' nature and hatin' anyone else, alright?
So first off, they claim to be pissed off by the fact that people "butcher" trees, but they have no problems with killing their own kind on purpose or killing off anyone else. And of course, they use born artifacts most of the time, but they think that butchering animals in wrong, so they just wait around for an animal to die and take its bones. That's fucked up on so many levels.
Second, they use bows. Made of wood and bones. And I thought these pansies hated wood artefacts, but here they are, shooting wooden arrows at my dwarves with their wooden bows. And where do they live, uh? WHERE DO THEY LIVE? In trees. Carved, of course. What the hell is wrong with them?
So I'd say, to satisfy everyone, let's just make elves similar to LOTR's elves. They are a-okay with cutting down trees, but they'll be most likely to allow nature in their fortress, with vines scourging on their walls and trees growing everywhere. Also being closer to animals and eat exclusively vegetables. They would also be closer to magic, I suppose. What could be interesting is having some differences between certain groups of elves, one being higher/closer to magic than the others for example.
And they could complain about... Huh... Dwarves hunting too much? I dunno.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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BigUglyWorm

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2035 on: August 29, 2020, 02:42:47 pm »

The elves are right: as in Don't Starve, if you harvest too many trees, the rest will start coming to life and attacking your fortress.  Unlike in Don't Starve, you can solve this problem pretty handily with magma.

Also, every kind of wood lends a specific aesthetic to objects and furniture made from it; dwarves will praise oak for its sturdy shapes, pine for its clean grain, and mahogany for its sweeping curves.  None of this is reflected in the graphics or item descriptions.

(Incidentally: does burning down trees on your map anger elves like harvesting them does?  Or do they only get mad if you actually get use out of them?)
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Egan_BW

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2036 on: August 29, 2020, 02:52:05 pm »

Animated trees are heat-proof, can punch down drawbridges and constructed walls, and will instantly kill any adjacent dwarf by draining all of its blood, using the nutrients gained to split off into two animated trees.
Teach you to disrespect nature, mountain dweller.
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delphonso

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2037 on: August 29, 2020, 09:50:54 pm »

Animated trees throw starved sheep skeletons from their branches

Starver

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2038 on: August 30, 2020, 02:02:29 am »

And the occasional light-blue Ford Anglia...
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IndigoFenix

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #2039 on: August 30, 2020, 10:06:26 am »

All stone, including constructed and natural walls, is now flammable.
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